The Breakfast Club (1985)
Molly Ringwald: Claire Standish
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Quotes
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[last lines]
Brian Johnson : [closing narration] Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
Andrew Clark : ...and an athlete...
Allison Reynolds : ...and a basket case...
Claire Standish : ...a princess...
John Bender : ...and a criminal.
Brian Johnson : Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.
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Richard Vernon : You're not fooling anyone, Bender. The next screw that falls out will be you.
John Bender : Eat my shorts.
Richard Vernon : What was that?
John Bender : Eat... my... shorts.
Richard Vernon : You just bought yourself another Saturday.
John Bender : Ooh, I'm crushed.
Richard Vernon : You just bought one more.
John Bender : Well I'm free the Saturday after that. Beyond that, I'm going to have to check my calendar.
Richard Vernon : Good, cause it's going to be filled. We'll keep going. You want another one? Just say the word say it. Instead of going to prison you'll come here. Are you through?
John Bender : No.
Richard Vernon : I'm doing society a favor.
John Bender : So?
Richard Vernon : That's another one right now! I've got you for the rest of your natural born life if you don't watch your step. You want another one?
John Bender : Yes.
Richard Vernon : You got it! You got another one right there! That's another one pal!
Claire Standish : Cut it out!
Richard Vernon : You through?
John Bender : Not even close bud!
Richard Vernon : Good! You got one more right there!
John Bender : You really think I give a shit?
Richard Vernon : Another! You through?
John Bender : How many is that?
Brian Johnson : That's seven including when we first came in and you asked Mr. Vernon whether Barry Manilow knew that he raided his closet.
Richard Vernon : Now it's eight. You stay out of this.
Brian Johnson : Excuse me sir, it's seven.
Richard Vernon : Shut up, peewee.
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Allison Reynolds : I'll do anything sexual. I don't need a million dollars to do it either.
Claire Standish : You're lying.
Allison Reynolds : I already have. I've done just about everything there is except a few things that are illegal. I'm a nymphomaniac.
Claire Standish : Lie.
Brian Johnson : Are your parents aware of this?
Allison Reynolds : The only person I told was my shrink.
Andrew Clark : And what did he do when you told him?
Allison Reynolds : He nailed me.
Claire Standish : Very nice.
Allison Reynolds : I don't think that from a legal standpoint what he did can be construed as rape, since I paid him.
Claire Standish : He's an adult.
Allison Reynolds : Yeah, he's married too.
Claire Standish : Do you have any idea how completely gross that is?
Allison Reynolds : Well, the first few times...
Claire Standish : The first few times? You mean you did it more than once?
Allison Reynolds : Sure.
Claire Standish : Are you crazy?
Brian Johnson : Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing a shrink.
Allison Reynolds : Have you ever done it?
Claire Standish : I don't even have a psychiatrist.
Allison Reynolds : Have you ever done it with a normal person?
Claire Standish : Didn't we already cover this?
John Bender : You never answered the question.
Claire Standish : Look, I'm not going to discuss my private life with total strangers.
Allison Reynolds : It's kind of a double edged sword isn't it?
Claire Standish : A what?
Allison Reynolds : Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?
Claire Standish : Wrong.
Allison Reynolds : Or are you a tease?
Andrew Clark : She's a tease.
Claire Standish : I'm sure. Why don't you just forget it.
Andrew Clark : Oh, you're a tease and you know it. All girls are teases.
John Bender : She's only a tease if what she does gets you hot.
Claire Standish : I don't do anything.
Allison Reynolds : That's why you're a tease.
Claire Standish : OK, let me ask you a few questions.
Allison Reynolds : I already told you everything.
Claire Standish : No. Doesn't it bother you to sleep around without being in love. I mean, don't you want any respect?
Allison Reynolds : I don't screw to get respect. That's the difference between you and me.
Claire Standish : It's not the only difference I hope.
John Bender : Face it, you're a tease.
Claire Standish : I'm NOT a tease.
John Bender : Sure you are. Sex is your weapon. You said it yourself. You use it to get respect.
Claire Standish : No, I never said that she twisted my words around.
John Bender : What do you use it for then?
Claire Standish : I don't use it period.
John Bender : Oh, are you medically frigid or is it psychological?
Claire Standish : I didn't mean it that way. You guys are putting words into my mouth.
John Bender : Well, if you'd just answer the question.
Brian Johnson : Why don't you just answer the question?
Andrew Clark : Be honest.
John Bender : No big deal.
Brian Johnson : Yeah answer it.
Andrew Clark : Answer the question, Claire.
John Bender : Talk to us. Every one: C'mon, answer the question. Come on. Answer it.
John Bender : C'mon, it's easy. It's only one question.
Claire Standish : NO I NEVER DID IT.
Allison Reynolds : I never did it either. I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar.
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Claire Standish : You know why guys like you knock everything?
John Bender : Oh, this should be stunning.
Claire Standish : It's because you're afraid.
John Bender : Oh God, you richies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy into activities.
Claire Standish : You're a big coward.
Brian Johnson : I'm in the math club.
Claire Standish : See, you're afraid that they won't take you, you don't belong, so you have to just dump all over it.
John Bender : Well, it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes, now would it?
Claire Standish : Well, you wouldn't know, you don't even know any of us.
John Bender : Well, I don't know any lepers either, but I'm not going to run out and join one of their fucking clubs.
Andrew Clark : Hey! Let's watch the mouth, huh?
Brian Johnson : I'm in the physics club too.
John Bender : Excuse me a sec. What are you babbling about?
Brian Johnson : Well, what I had said was I'm in the math club, uh, the Latin, and the physics club... physics club.
John Bender : Hey, Cherry. Do you belong to the physics club?
Claire Standish : That's an academic club.
John Bender : So?
Claire Standish : So academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs.
John Bender : Ah... but to dorks like him, they are. What do you guys do in your club?
Brian Johnson : Well, in physics we... we talk about physics, properties of physics.
John Bender : So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social. Right?
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Andrew Clark : I taped Larry Lester's buns together.
Brian Johnson : That was you?
Andrew Clark : Yeah, you know him?
Brian Johnson : Yeah, I know him.
Andrew Clark : Well, then you know how hairy he is. And when they pulled the tape off, most of his hair came off and some - some skin, too.
Claire Standish : Oh my God.
Andrew Clark : And the bizarre thing is that I did it for my old man. I tortured this poor kid because I wanted him to think that I was cool. He's always going off about how when he was in school and all the wild things he used to do. And I got the feeling that he was disappointed that I never cut loose on anyone, right? So I'm sitting in the locker room and I'm taping up my knee, and Larry's undressing a couple lockers down from me. And he's kinda, he's kinda skinny. Weak. And I started thinkin' about my father, and his attitude about, about weakness. And the next thing I knew, I jumped on top of him and started whaling on him. And my friends, they just laughed and cheered me on. And afterwards, when I'm sitting in Vernon's office, all I could think about was Larry's father and Larry having to go home and explain what happened to him. And the humiliation - the fucking humiliation he must have felt. It must have been unreal. I mean, how... how do you apologize for something like that? There's no way. It's all because of me and my old man. God, I fucking hate him. He's like this mindless machine that I can't even relate to anymore.
[crying, imitating his father]
Andrew Clark : 'Andrew! You've got to be number one! I won't tolerate any losers in this family! Your intensity is for shit! Win! Win! Win!' You son of a bitch. You know, sometimes I wish my knee would give. And I wouldn't be able to wrestle anymore. And he could forget all about me.
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John Bender : Uh, Dick? Excuse me; Rich. Will milk be made available to us?
Andrew Clark : We're extremely thirsty, sir.
Claire Standish : I have a really low tolerance for dehydration.
Andrew Clark : I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross.
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John Bender : [after Claire performs her lipstick trick, claps sarcastically] Wow, Claire. That was great. My image of you is totally blown.
Allison Reynolds : You're a shit. Don't do that to her, you swore to God you wouldn't laugh.
John Bender : Am I laughing?
Andrew Clark : [shouts angrily] You fuckin' prick!
John Bender : What do you care what I think anyway? I don't even count, right? I could disappear forever and it wouldn't make any difference. I might as well not even exist at this school, remember?
[turns to Claire]
John Bender : And you... don't like me anyway.
Claire Standish : You know, I have just as, many feelings as you do and it hurts so much when someone steps all over them.
John Bender : God! You're so pathetic. Don't you ever, *ever* compare yourself to me, okay. You got everything, and I got shit. Fuckin' Rapunzel, right? School would probably fuckin' shut down if you didn't show up. Queenie isn't here. I like those earrings, Claire.
Claire Standish : Shut up.
John Bender : Are those real diamonds Claire?
Claire Standish : Shut up.
John Bender : I bet they are. Did you work for the money for those earrings?
Claire Standish : Shut your mouth.
John Bender : Or did your daddy buy those for you?
Claire Standish : [shouts] SHUT UP!
John Bender : I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. Right? You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." All right? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?
Andrew Clark : My God, are we gonna be like our parents?
Claire Standish : Not me. Ever.
[Bender nods]
Allison Reynolds : It's unavoidable. It just happens.
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John Bender : [after Claire kisses his neck] Why'd you do that?
Claire Standish : 'Cause I knew you wouldn't.
Claire Standish : [pause] Were you truly disgusted with what I did with my lipstick?
John Bender : The truth?
Claire Standish : Yeah.
John Bender : [nods] No.
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[Claire is doing Allison's make-up]
Claire Standish : You know, you look a lot better without all that black shit under your eyes.
Allison Reynolds : Hey, I like all that black shit... Why are you being so nice to me?
Claire Standish : Because you're letting me.
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John Bender : What's in there?
Claire Standish : Guess? Where's your lunch?
John Bender : You're wearing it.
Claire Standish : You're nauseating.
John Bender : [pointing to Claire's lunch] What's that?
Claire Standish : Sushi.
John Bender : Sushi?
Claire Standish : Rice, raw fish, and seaweed.
John Bender : You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth, and you're going to eat that?
Claire Standish : Can I eat?
John Bender : I don't know. Give it a try.
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John Bender : YOU ARE A BITCH.
Claire Standish : Why? 'Cause I'm telling the truth, that makes me a bitch?
John Bender : NO. 'Cause you know how shitty that is to do someone, and you don't got the balls to stand up to your friends and tell them you're gonna like who you wanna like.
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Claire Standish : Why didn't you want me to know that you are a virgin?
Brian Johnson : Because it's personal business. It's my personal, private business.
John Bender : Well, Brian, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business.
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Claire Standish : Do you know how popular I am? I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school.
John Bender : Poor baby.
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Claire Standish : [about her parents] I don't think either one of them gives a shit about me. It's like they use me just to get back at each other.
Allison Reynolds : [her first word of dialogue so far] Ha!
Claire Standish : [long pause] Shut up!
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Claire Standish : What would your friends say if we were walking down the hall together. They'd laugh their asses off and you'd probably tell them you were doing it with me so they'd forgive you for being seen with me.
John Bender : Don't you ever talk about my friends. You don't know any of my friends. You don't look at any of my friends. And you certainly wouldn't condescend to speak to any of my friends. So you just stick to the things you know: shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW, and your poor, rich drunk mother in the Caribbean.
Claire Standish : SHUT UP!
John Bender : And as far as being concerned about what's gonna happen when you and I walk down the hallways of school together, you can forget it cuz it's never gonna happen. Just bury your head in the sand and wait for your fuckin' prom.
Claire Standish : [Crying] I hate you!
John Bender : Yeah? Good!
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[John Bender is absently tearing up books]
Andrew Clark : That's real intelligent.
John Bender : You're right. It's wrong to destroy literature. It's such fun to read. And
[examines title]
John Bender : Moe-Lay really pumps my nads.
Claire Standish : Moliere.
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Claire Standish : I hate it. I hate having to go along with everything my friends say.
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Claire Standish : He's just doing it to get a rise out of you. Just ignore him.
John Bender : Sweets. You couldn't ignore me if you tried. So... so. Are you guys like boyfriend-girlfriend? Steady dates? Lovers? Come on, sporto, level with me. Do you slip her the hot beef injection?
Claire Standish : GO TO HELL!
Andrew Clark : ENOUGH!
Richard Vernon : [from his office] Hey! What's going on in there? Spoiled little pricks.
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Claire Standish : What's your name?
John Bender : What's yours?
Claire Standish : Claire.
John Bender : Claire?
Claire Standish : Claire. It's a family name.
John Bender : Oh, it's a fat girl's name.
Claire Standish : Oh, thank you.
John Bender : You're welcome.
Claire Standish : I'm not fat.
John Bender : Well not at present, but I can see you really pushing maximum density. See I'm not sure if you know this, but there are two kinds of fat people: there's fat people that were born to be fat, and there's fat people that were once thin but became fat... so when you look at 'em you can sorta see that thin person inside. You see, you're gonna get married, you're gonna squeeze out a few puppies and then, uh...
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John Bender : [after putting his head between Claire's legs under the table] It was an accident.
Claire Standish : You're an asshole.
John Bender : Sue me.
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Richard Vernon : Well, well. Here we are. I want to congratulate you for being on time.
Claire Standish : Excuse me, sir. I think there's been a mistake. I know it's detention, but I don't think I belong in here.
[Vernon ignores her and looks at his watch]
Richard Vernon : It is now 7:06. You have exactly 8 hours and 54 minutes to think about *why* you are here, to ponder the error of your ways.
[Bender spits out a wad of saliva in the air and catches with his mouth, prompting Claire to almost exclaim in disgust, but Vernon stops her by pointing]
Richard Vernon : You may not talk.
[Brian tries to move to the chair next to him on the table]
Richard Vernon : You will not move - from these seats.
[to Bender, who is relaxing his feet on a chair, but Vernon pulls it out from under Bender's feet]
Richard Vernon : And *you* - will not sleep. Alright, people, we're going to try something a little different, today. We are going to write an essay - of no less than a thousand words, describing to me who you think you are.
[starts handing out sheets of paper]
John Bender : Is this a test?
Richard Vernon : And when I say 'essay' I mean *'essay'*. I do not mean a single word repeated a thousand times. Is that clear, Mr. Bender?
Richard Vernon : Crystal.
Richard Vernon : Good. Maybe you'll learn a little something about yourself. Maybe you'll even decide, whether or not, you'd care to return.
Brian Johnson : Uh, you know, I can answer that right now, sir. That'd be no. No from me, 'cause...
Richard Vernon : [contemptuously] Sit down, Johnson.
Brian Johnson : Thank you, sir.
Richard Vernon : My office is right across that hall. Any monkey business is ill-advised. Any questions?
John Bender : Yeah, I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?
Richard Vernon : I'll give you the answer to that question, Mr. Bender, next Saturday. Don't mess with the bull, young man, you'll get the horns.
[exits the library]
John Bender : That man - is a brownie-hound.
[after he and the other students see and hear Allison biting her fingernails]
John Bender : If you keep eating your hand, you're not gonna be hungry for lunch.
[Allison bites another fingernail, and spits it out]
John Bender : I've seen you before, you know.
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John Bender : Claire, you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitis of the nuts? It's pretty tasty.
Claire Standish : No thank you.
John Bender : How does he ride a bike?
John Bender : Oh Claire, would you ever consider dating a guy who looked like this?
Claire Standish : Can't you just leave me alone?
John Bender : I mean even if he had a nice personality and a cool car... although you'd probably have to ride in the backseat because his nuts would ride shotgun.
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John Bender : Are you a virgin? I'll bet you a million dollars that you are. Let's end the suspense! Is it gonna be... a white wedding?
Claire Standish : Why don't you just shut up?
John Bender : Have you ever kissed a boy on the mouth?
[Claire doesn't answer]
John Bender : Have you ever been felt up? Over the bra, under the blouse, shoes off... hoping to God your parents don't walk in?
Claire Standish : Do you want me to puke?
John Bender : Over the panties, no bra, blouse unbuttoned, Calvins in a ball on the front seat, past eleven on a school night?
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Brian Johnson : You're so conceited, Claire. You're so conceited. You're so, like, full of yourself. Why are you like that?
Claire Standish : I'm not saying that to be conceited. I hate it. I hate having to go along with everything my friends say.
Brian Johnson : Then why do you do it?
Claire Standish : I don't know. I don't - you don't understand. You don't - you're not friends with the same kind of people that Andy and I are friends with. You know, you just don't understand the pressure that they can put on you.
Brian Johnson : I don't understand what? You think I don't understand pressure, Claire?
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John Bender : Oh, shit! What're we s'posed to do if we have to take a piss?
Claire Standish : Please.
John Bender : If you gotta go, you gotta go.
Claire Standish : Oh my god!
Andrew Clark : Hey, you're not urinating in here man!
John Bender : Don't talk, don't talk. It makes it crawl back up.
Andrew Clark : You whip it out and you're dead before the first drop hits the floor.
John Bender : You're pretty sexy when you get angry.
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Allison Reynolds : I can write with my toes. I can also eat, brush my teeth
Claire Standish : With your feet?
Allison Reynolds : Play "Heart and Soul" on the piano...
Brian Johnson : I can make spaghetti.
Claire Standish : What can you do?
Andrew Clark : I can, tape all of your buns together.
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Richard Vernon : [enters the library before lunchtime] All right, girls, that's 30 minutes for lunch.
Andrew Clark : Here?
Richard Vernon : Here.
Andrew Clark : Well, I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch in, sir.
Richard Vernon : [irritably] Well, I don't really care what you think, Andrew.
John Bender : [raises his hand] Dick, uh, excuse me. Rich, will milk be made available to us?
Claire Standish : [to Vernon] I have a low tolerance for dehydration.
Andrew Clark : I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross.
John Bender : Relax, I'll get it.
Richard Vernon : [stops him] Ah-ah-ah! Grab some wood, there, bub. What do you think, I was born yesterday? You think I'm gonna have you roaming these halls?
[points to Andrew]
Richard Vernon : You
[Andrew willingly points to Claire, but Vernon points to a spaced-out Allison]
Richard Vernon : and you. Hey!
[snaps fingers and turns to the others]
Richard Vernon : What's her name? Wake her up. Wake her up. Hey, come on, missy, on your feet, let's go! This is no rest home.
[Allison stares strangely at Vernon as she stands up]
Richard Vernon : There's a soft drink machine in the teacher's lounge. Let's go!
[the rest of the kids take their time giving Andrew and Allison change]
Richard Vernon : Come on, shake your tail feather, let's go, ante up! Some people don't even get a lunch hour. Come on, get a move on!
Claire Standish : [takes out a $20 bill] Excuse me, sir, can you break this?
[Vernon scoffs sarcastically]
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Claire Standish : Why would anybody want to steal a screw?
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Claire Standish : [to Bender] Why don't you shut up? Nobody here is interested.
Andrew Clark : Really. Butt face.
John Bender : Hey, sporto, what'd you do to get in here? Forget to wash your jock?
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John Bender : Brian's trying to tell me that in addition to the number of girls in the Niagara Falls area, that presently you and he are riding the hobby horse.
Claire Standish : Little pig.
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Brian Johnson : When I step outside myself, kind of, and, like, when I look in at myself, you know? And I see me. I don't like what I see. I really don't.
Claire Standish : What's wrong with you? Why don't you like yourself?
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Claire Standish : What would I do for a million bucks?
Andrew Clark : I guess I'd do as little as I had to.
Claire Standish : That's boring.
Andrew Clark : How am I supposed to answer?
Claire Standish : The idea is to, like, search your mind for the absolute limit. Like, would you drive to school naked?