Diggin' Up Business (1990)

Yvonne Craig: Lucille

Quotes 

• Widow Knockerby : Dear? Dear? Dear, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine. Lucille Cross.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Oh, so nice to meet you, Miss Cross.

  Lucille : Mrs. Cross, thank you.

  Widow Knockerby : Well actually now it'd be the widow Cross.

  Lucille : You're right.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : I'm so sorry.

  Lucille : It's very recent.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Oh, I understand.

  Albert : Isn't that Deputy Don?

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Don! I forgot!

  Lucille : Oh, I forget sometimes too, dear. It gets worse as you get older.

  Widow Knockerby : Lucille was commenting on the extraordinary way you displayed Clarence. So decorative.

  Albert : You're meeting him here? Love among the dead? It's so gothic.

  Widow Knockerby : Lucille was seriously considering having Marvin done here.

  Albert : Sounds as if she wants him to have a haircut.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Don!

  Don : Hiya honey.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Hi dear.

  Don : Albert.

  Albert : Hi partner.

  Don : Don.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Don, I'd like you to meet Mrs Knockerby and, I'm sorry, what was your name?

  Lucille : Lucille.

  Widow Knockerby : The widow Cross.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Don, I'm afraid I'm going to have to cancel tonight.

  Don : Oh drat! It's only one night, Teezy-weezy.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Something has come up, dear.

  Albert : Teezy-weezy?

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Albert! And I have to work tonight.

  Don : Oh? Do you work here now, Albert?

  Albert : No, actually I'm still in linen.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Albert sells bathroom towels.

  Albert : Well, because you can never have enough after-bath wraps.

  Don : I can.

  Widow Knockerby : The widow Cross's Marvin was a big fan of Gypsy Rose Lee.

  Lucille : That's right, and I was thinking maybe a burlesque motif for the service.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : I beg your pardon?

  Lucille : Well, you know, a kind of New Orleans feel.

  Widow Knockerby : Oh, Lucille, this is the girl who designed Clarence's face.

  Lucille : Oh, I was so impressed. We were just discussing my Marvin. I think I'd like to send him off as a chorus line kicker!

• Tesia Papadapacropolis : Mrs, that is to say widow Cross, I'm afraid that won't be possible.

  Lucille : Why not?

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Well, we're really not set up to accommodate that sort of request.

  Lucille : Now, I understand that a theme such as this doesn't come cheap, and I'm willing to pay for all the extras. Just name your price.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Oh... uh, what do you think?

  Albert : I think it's your funeral. Get the cheque. Get the cheque!

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Entertain Don while us girls talk business.

  Albert : Oh, righto. Thank you.

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Is it a problem, Mona?

  Mona : No problem!

  Widow Knockerby : Well, what did I tell you? Trust me, it is going to be the hit of the season!

  Tesia Papadapacropolis : Shall we make the arrangements now? You did say you brought your check book?