Bean (1997)

Pamela Reed: Alison Langley

Quotes 

• [the Langleys have a conference about Bean's arrival] 

  Jennifer Langley : [in sarcastic tone]  You're kidding.

  David Langley : Come on, it's gonna be great! Let's say there's a chart of the most intelligent people you've ever met in your lives. Well, at number one with the bullet is Doctor Bean.

  [family sighs] 

  Kevin Langley : Kevin, you know how sometimes you ask me questions that I can't answer.

  Kevin Langley : Yeah Like "What is an intrauterine device"?

  David Langley : I think more like "What's the meaning of life?"

  Kevin Langley : I never asked you that.

  David Langley : That's fine. It doesn't matter! What I'm saying here is that Doctor Bean is a very remarkable man.

  David Langley : [to Jennifer]  Hey, for all you know, he could be very cute.

  [cuts to Bean standing in London raising his eyebrows at the camera] 

  David Langley : [cuts back to Jennifer] 

  Jennifer Langley : Come on, the guy's gonna be a creep. All Englishmen are ugly. I just look at Prince Charles and weep.

  David Langley : Okay, so he's gonna look like meatloaf's butt.

  Jennifer Langley : Yeah, and that's if we get lucky.

  [Jennifer prepares to leave the room] 

  David Langley : Jennifer, no one is asking you to marry him!

  Jennifer Langley : I don't know why we have these family conferences if Dad's already made up his mind.

  Alison Langley : Perceptive child.

  Kevin Langley : Hey, what's wrong with meatloaf's butt?

  David Langley : [stands up and shouts loudly across the room]  Oh, come on, everybody! It's gonna be great! Doctor Bean is a genius at the very highest order!

• Kevin Langley : [return a short while with their mother, with Bean absent]  Hi, Dad.

  Jennifer Langley : Hi, Dad.

  Alison Langley : [Bean appears]  Hello, doctor.

  Kevin Langley : Bye, dad.

  Jennifer Langley : Bye, dad.

  [both leave, leaving David full of distress]