Add a Review

  • As far as I am aware this is the only mermaid porn film in existence. If anybody knows of any others please let me know!!! For that reason alone it is unique.

    Its an adult take on "Splash" with Traci Lords as our voluptuous mermaid who can conveniently materialise legs when out of the water. Lords is amazing and lights up the screen, it is unbelievable to think that she is just 16! This film was quickly taken off the shelves and reshot with a different actress and I hear that the remake is awful since what makes this movie is Lords.

    The film has a clear plot, attempt at acting and a great deal of charm. Secretly I rather enjoyed it!
  • When porn was shot on film, like this was, it wasn't the disposable mush it is now. There was some artistry (I said "some" artistry) and there was an effort to layer in a story. With the exception of some recent Brad Armstrong films and some of Paul Thomas's work, most X-raters these days, especially the conservative efforts from the larger corporations like Vivid, are bland. As I've discussed in other "X" reviewers, there are ultra-rough and nasty vids being churned now, too, but these feed a niche.

    "Talk Dirty To Me 3" has little in common with solid entries that came before it. The first, directed by Anthony Spinelli, is considered a classic. The second is a seriously good effort, too. This installment, which turned Ron Howard's "Splash" premise into a porn premise, is reasonably well made (for porn) and does boast a killer cast -- most notably Traci Lords, Ginger Lynn and the super-cute Rikki Blake. John Leslie, who starred in the previous installments, stars in this episode also, as does the infamous Jamie Gillis and newbie actor (at the time) Tom Byron. Missing was veteran of the previous flicks Richard Pacheo.

    By today's jaded standards, the sex in TDTM3 is fairly tame and not at all mean-spirited or overly graphic. The film is certainly X-rated, but it has an innocence to it that suited the source material it was borrowing.

    Avoid the non-Traci version at all costs.

    Director Ned Morhead also made the sleazy "Desperate Women".
  • An adult version of the hit movie SPLASH. This features Traci as a mermaid who runs into Leslie and learns to talk dirty to add to the sexual passion.

    This has since been re-released with the 16 year old Traci removed and replaced with another actress. But it was done very badly, with Leslie recreating the scenes (obviously older then when he originally did them), and the replacement were obviously done on video where the original was done on film. The original I rate highly, the re-release I rate poorly.
  • Traci Lords is a mermaid, who apparently not having male mermaids (how the hell do they procreate the species anyway) decides to go among the land of the humans for some fun, in this porn takeoff on "Splash". She spies two people going at it, Jack (the star of most of the films in the "Talk dirty to Me" series) and Rikki Blake, and naturally is enthralled. She falls for Jack of course. But her limited vocabulary and no one believing Jack when he says she's a mermaid is the source of "humor"It's not really funny, just annoying. But the sex scenes are good, plus Traci, Ginger Lynn, Amber Lynn, and a pre-enhanced Bunny Bleu are all hot. This is the most sought after of the films in the series by porn fans, because of the rarity of the original picture after Ms. Lords outed herself as underage.

    My Porn Grade: B
  • When I was 16 years old the guy at the video store said that he could not rent or sell the movie because of Tracy Lords being underage. But nobody said he couldn't give it away, so he gave it to me. Thanks Dude! I must have watched that movie 1,426 times! It was perfect because Tracy Lords was 16 too. Now I would be a perv if I watched it (not that I can because I lost it ten years ago) but back then it was my one and only porno and it got me through High School. I do remember that Tracy Lords had this crazy high squeal so I mostly watched it with the sound down (a practice I still use today when watching porno) and she had a Huge Rack that I guess was natural but not on any 16 year old I ever knew. And John Leslie was a Cool Mo Fo. He knew how to treat the ladies.
  • According to Traci Lords autobiography, "Underneath it all", in addition to winning an award this film also really boosted her reputation due to her offstage adventures. "The story of my poolside threesome spread through the porn world like wildfire, making me even more sought after in porn films. I was thought of as insatiable. But it wasn't that I couldn't get enough on-screen. It was that I got nothing. I was venting, releasing the garbage that polluted my mind in the only way I knew how."

    Traci also claims there was quite a bit of tension between her and Ginger Lynn who significantly resented her status as a rising star.
  • scottutsler19 April 2005
    Warning: Spoilers
    Talk Dirty To Me 3 Ahhh. Harken back to the days of 70's porn. Where men were studs and women never shaved. Our story begins at a country club. A mermaid, (yes, a mermaid), decides it's time for a man in her life. Enter two men who are strictly there for the view. Seems the women work out naked. Marty is married with children. Jack likes the ladies. The mermaid decides to keep an eye on Jack and spies on him as he makes love to the coach of the womens workout team. She then hides behind the building a learns about her new body. Jack is then at Marty's place eating dinner when Marty's son Tommy comes home and over hears a plan to break him and his girlfriend, Linda, up. The mermaid, meanwhile is hanging out with Linda and her friends. Right in the middle of her English lesson, Tommy comes to warn Linda of the plan to break them up and they make love vowing to stay together no matter what. The next morning, Jack goes to Linda's house pretending to be a pool cleaner and runs into the mermaid. Thinking that Tommy is the mermaid's boyfriend, Jack accidentally pushes her into the pool and learn what she really is. He changes his mind about Linda right there and then thinking that Marty played a joke on him. The mermaid decides that she wants Jack all to herself and would do what she had to to get him. Jack, meanwhile, thinking he's going crazy, go to see a shrink friend of his. While Jack is making love to the shrink, a man named Fast Eddie comes into the office and overhears the mermaid talk. He offers Jack a boat load of money for proof of the mermaid's existence. That night, Tommy confronts his parents about their plan and moves into Linda's place. Jack and Marty both show up at Linda's place. Jack for proof and Marty cause his wife kicked him out for standing up for his son. While Marty has a threesome with Linda's friends, Jack looks for the proof.The next morning, Marty decides to go home and work things out with his wife. Realizing that he really does love her, Jack takes the mermaid to a safe location and makes love to her. Eddie finds them but is quickly arrested. Everyone is happy and the movie ends at linda's house with Jack and the mermaid in the pool and Tommy and Linda (another mermaid) kissing on the edge of the pool. And Marty with his two new mermaid lovers sitting on a lounge chair. This has everything you'd expect from a 70's porn. Relive the golden age of porn and watch i
  • Warning: Spoilers
    There's nothing like the original,don't hesitate to believe that the re-edited version just didn't cut it. The downside to this movie is that most of John Leslie's scenes are too short.That's relative though. Leslie has scenes with Rikki Blake and Traci Lords. The movie was a production of the times.Back in the early 80's adult film makers was generous to something called dialogue and plot.Its like they wanted to make to justice in ripping off Hollywood. The cast is talented and shows damn good acting! Marc Wallice and Peter North makes cameos.

    John Leslie (jack) and his friend Marty (jamie Gillis) share humorous wiseass moments.Even Traci Lords back then looks appropriate in her role as a sweet innocent lonely mermaid looking for love. With her girlish voice, pasted down wet hair, she desires Leslie's character,Jack, whom she first saw at the nudist camp. She got caught before she lost her 1000 fires. She was never that innocent, getting acting experience before may 1986. Traci's at her most cutest saying stuff like "hot throbbing Dick" and "I want you to come all over my face" without knowing what they meant.Talk dirty to me. The camp instructor (Rikki Blake), warms up to Jack, and the mermaid wants her piece. Marty's ice queen wife (Sylvia-Sharon Kelly) plots with Jack to break up her stepson's (Tommy,Tom Byron) relationship with Linda (Ginger) 'cause he's flunking college. Tommy tells Linda and the two hit the bed. Jack shows up the next day, but Tommy points him to someone else. That person was 'dick' the mermaid. She resumes coming onto jack until he mistakenly knocks her in the pool and she has fins for legs. She looks normal once she comes back out. Jack quickly got out of dodge. Maybe he's seeing stuff. He goes to see a scientist,Dr. Spangler,(Amber Lynn) for business, that's after they screw. Traci followed Jack and overhears. So did Fast Eddie, the fast talking salesman who believes Jack. Tom tells Sylvia and Marty he knew about the plan, and pisses his evil Stepmother off. He leaves and Sylvia kicks out.They end up at Linda's house and Jack apologized. Marty gets a 'tour' with Therese and Chrissie in a great triplet scene. The final nail in his and Slyvia's marriage is finding her with Mr. Cunninglus, as he calls him. Jack backs out of the deal with Fast Eddie and finds the Mermaid to warn. She upset with him though, he's been ignoring her. They make up by getting physical and escapes from Eddie in the water. They come up on the other side for a surprise. Marty hooks up with his own Mermaid and Tommy's Linda is a mermaid.
  • Traci plays a mermaid who seeks shelter in a nudist camp where she falls in love with John Leslie after watching his adventures with a very hot activity director, Rikki Blake. I have little to add to other reviews except Leslie's seduction of Rikki will steam up your memory for quite a long time. Leslie cannot convince most of the others he has seen a mermaid, so he returns to Traci for quite a passionate love scene. Amber Lynn plays a biologist Leslie goes to for advice where she strip teases him without slowing the pace too much of a fairly exciting scene. Leslie died recently. He was much well loved or liked by his leads in contrast to the leering scoundrel tough guy portrayed on film. This film was called Splash X and renamed Talk Dirty, I think.