- Cinderella: Look at me, poor old Cinders, scrubbing floors and cleanin' windows. Always wearing the same old rag - isn't life a bleedin' drag?
- Bob Cratchit: Mr Scrooge, I was wondering, could you make a little advance to me?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: [Turns to face the camera] Not only long and stupid, but bent to boot!
- [Robert Browning has arrived to take Elizabeth Barrett to Venice]
- Robert Browning: We can leave by the fire escape.
- Elizabeth Barrett: There *is* no fire escape!
- Robert Browning: Now, she remembers!
- Bob Cratchit: Mr. Scrooge, is it alright if I go off now?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Yeah. Soon as you put all the books in alphabetical order, clean away the cobwebs, polish the floor and wash the windows. And a merry Christmas to ya.
- Bob Cratchit: But Mr. Scrooge, it'll take me a whole week to get through that lot.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: In that case, scrub the merry Christmas, make it happy New Year.
- Spirit of Christmas Present: I am the spirit of Christmas Present.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Give away. It's the best Christmas present I ever had.
- Spirit of Christmas Present: No, no, you just sit and behave while I tell you all your faults.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Yeah, well hurry up, cause I'm getting hot under the collar.
- Spirit of Christmas Present: Well, there's two things that stick out a mile.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: That's what's making me hot under the collar.
- Robert Browning: [to Elizabeth] The colour's come back in your cheeks. They look lovely when they're green like that.
- Cinderella: Oh Buttons, how I wish I was dead, old Scrooge wants to get me into bed.
- Buttons: The saucy thing, oh aren't you lucky? I always thought he was rather ducky.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: I'm going off now.
- Bob Cratchit: [Looking around] I thought there was a funny smell!
- Ebenezer Scrooge: I'll thump you!
- Robert Browning: [after climbing down the chimmny] I'll tell you this, now I know what it feels like, I'll never use a pipe cleaner again!
- Ebenezer Scrooge: [the Ghost has kicked the chamber pot full of coins] You've struck gold, there!
- Spirit of Christmas Past: Your chamber of commerce, I suppose!
- Robert Browning: [Pushing Mr Barret aside] Do you mind? I'm kicking the bucket!
- Mr Barrett: [picking up a gold coloured bucket] I'll just move it out of your way!
- Ebenezer Scrooge: [waking up] what a nightmare! It must have been that cheese I had for supper - maybe I should have left it on the mousetrap!