Idiocracy (2006)
David Herman: Secretary of State
Photos
Quotes
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[cabinet has been debating putting water on the plants instead of Brawndo]
Pvt. Joe Bowers : What *are* these electrolytes? Do you even know?
Secretary of State : They're... what they use to make Brawndo!
Pvt. Joe Bowers : But *why* do they use them to make Brawndo?
Secretary of Defense : [raises hand after a pause] Because Brawndo's got electrolytes.
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Secretary of State : I'm Secretary of State, brought to you by Carl's Jr.
Pvt. Joe Bowers : Why do you keep saying that?
Secretary of State : Because they pay me everytime I do.
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Pvt. Joe Bowers : For the last time, I'm pretty sure what's killing the crops is this Brawndo stuff.
Secretary of State : But Brawndo's got what plants crave. It's got electrolytes.
Attorney General : So wait a minute. What you're saying is that you want us to put water on the crops?
Pvt. Joe Bowers : Yes
Attorney General : Water. Like out the toilet?
Pvt. Joe Bowers : Well, I mean, it doesn't have to be out of the toilet, but, yeah, that's the idea.
Secretary of State : But Brawndo's got what plants crave.
Attorney General : It's got electrolytes.
Pvt. Joe Bowers : Okay, look. The plants aren't growing, so I'm pretty sure that the Brawndo's not working. Now, I'm no botanist, but I do know that if you put water on plants, they grow.
Secretary of Energy : Well, I've never seen no plants grow out of no toilet.
Secretary of State : Hey, that's good. You sure you ain't the smartest guy in the world?
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Secretary of State : You're so smart, why don't you know that?
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Secretary of State : They found that whore you wanted.
Pvt. Joe Bowers : Hey, that may be how you refer to women in the future, but come on.
Secret Service Thug : No, sir. Turns out she charged some guy a lotta money and didn't put out. Don't worry though. We'll get her out on a work-release whorin' license, as long as you're doin' her.