The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Pork Chop Indeterminacy (2008)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Sheldon : Eat this cheese without farting, and you can sleep with my sister.
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Howard Wolowitz : Is is because I'm Jewish? Because I would kill my rabbi with a pork chop to be with your sister.
Sheldon Cooper : It has nothing to do with religion. It has to do with the fact that you're a tiny man who lives with his mother.
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[Sheldon's hot twin sister, Missy, is in town for a wedding]
Leonard Hofstadter : If the wedding's not until tomorrow, why don't you stay with us tonight?
Missy : Oh, I don't think so. Shelly doesn't like company. Even as a little boy, he'd send his imaginary friends home at the end of the day.
Sheldon Cooper : They were not "friends". They were imaginary colleagues.
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Raj Koothrappali : Everyone knows genetic diversity produces the strongest offspring. Why not put a little mocha in your latte?
Sheldon Cooper : That is true, but consider the fact that you require medication to even talk to someone of the opposite sex.
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Sheldon Cooper : She's my twin sister. She thinks she's funny, but frankly, I've never been able to see it.
Missy : That's because you have no measurable sense of humor, Shelly.
Sheldon Cooper : How exactly would one measure a sense of humor? A humormometer?
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Sheldon Cooper : Yes, we shared a uterus for 9 months, but since then, we've pretty much gone our separate ways.
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Sheldon Cooper : If anyone is to get at Missy's Fallopian tubes, they have to get through me.
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Sheldon Cooper : I always thought I was more like a cuckoo bird. You know, a superior creature whose egg is placed in the nest of ordinary birds. Of course, the newly hatched cuckoo eats all the food, leaving the ordinary siblings to starve to death. Luckily for you, that's where the metaphor ended.
Missy Cooper : I thought it ended at cuckoo.
