The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Transporter Malfunction (2012)
Leonard Nimoy: Mr. Spock
Photos
Quotes
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Mr. Spock : Dr. Cooper! Dr. Cooper!
Sheldon Cooper : Is someone there?
Mr. Spock : Down here, on your desk.
Sheldon Cooper : Spock?
Mr. Spock : I need to speak with you.
Sheldon Cooper : Fascinating! The only logical explanation is that this is a dream.
Mr. Spock : It is not the only logical explanation. For example, you could be hallucinating after being hit on the head by, say, a coconut.
Sheldon Cooper : Was I hit on the head by a coconut?
Mr. Spock : I'm not going to dignify that with a response. Now, to the matter at hand, you need to play with the transporter toy.
Sheldon Cooper : Yes, but it's mint in box.
Mr. Spock : Yes, and to open it would destroy its value. But remember like me, you also have a human-half.
Sheldon Cooper : Well, I'm not going to dignify *that* with a response!
Mr. Spock : Consider this. What is the purpose of a toy?
Sheldon Cooper : To be played with.
Mr. Spock : Therefore, to not play with it would be...?
Sheldon Cooper : Illogical. Oh, damn it, Spock, you're right! I'll do it!
Mr. Spock : Sheldon, wait. You have to wake up first.
Sheldon Cooper : Oh, of course. Set phasers to dumb, right?
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Mr. Spock : Well, I am unhappy.
Sheldon Cooper : I thought where you come from they don't have emotions.
Mr. Spock : I come from a factory in Taiwan.
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Sheldon Cooper : You know what you are? well you're a green-blooded buzzkill. Perhaps it's time you beam on outta here.
Mr. Spock : Fine. I will just use the transporter. Oh, right, you broke it.
Sheldon Cooper : Very well. Cooper to Enterprise, one to beam up. Energize.
[picks up the Spock action figure and throws it]