Cassie Glenn
Maggie
Heather
Dirk
Brett
Other Heather
John
Ms. Glenn
Mr. Klein
Ms. Mallow
Madame Mulva
Ms. Wood
Jenny
Mrs. Cranberry
Jim Nast
Randall
Steve Smith
Talent Judge 1
Talent Judge 2
Thesbian
Buck (as Sean Riggs)
Jo
Eugene
Wesley
Arturo
Stephen Nicks
Principle McGee (as Steve Smith)
Hot Angry Homeless Guy