The first film was rubbish, the second film was terrible, the third film was awful, the fourth film was crap, and the fifth was stupid, the TV-made Sharknado series has been one of the trashiest movie franchises ever created, I was relieved, as both a critic and a sane person who doesn't enjoy watching the film that this was the final instalment. Basically it continues right where Global Swarming left off, the Earth has been completely devastated from the global sharknado swarm. Fin Shepard (Ian Ziering) and his now-adult son Gil have travelled back in time, 66 million years to the Cretaceous period, filled with dinosaurs, to prevent the first sharknado and destroy the phenomena once and for all. It turns out Gil was just a hologram message, as the energy to time travel is unstable, an individual can only travel back in time once. Fin is shocked to find his wife April Wexler (Tara Reid), Nova Clarke (Cassandra Scerbo) and Bryan (30 Rock's Judah Friedlander) are there, Gil changed the past and brought them back to life to join him in his quest. The first sharknado appears during a meteor storm, the group ride on a pterodactylus and Fin uses fragments of heated meteorites for the storm to consume, the sharknado is exploded and dissipates. They believe history has been changed and the sharknado phenomenon has been erased, so they use a capacitor to travel back to the present day. But instead they travel to medieval times, Bryan is changed into a woman (Debra Wilson) due to a temporal alteration, they encounter Morgana le Fay (drag artist Alaska) and are brought to Merlin (Neil deGrasse Tyson), it is revealed that Gil's time traveling has altered space-time, unleashing the sharknados throughout history as he searches for his parents. April is unintentionally made aware of her future fate, as she and Fin are about to reconnect, a sharknado forms above the castle. Morgana warns Fin that only the one worthy can pull the magical sword Excalibur from the stone, but he manages to take it, Morgana is killed by a falling shark, and Fin uses the sword to defeat the sharknado. The group then travel to the Revolutionary War where they meet Benjamin Franklin (Will & Grace's Leslie Jordan) and George Washington (Darrell Hammond), they use the cannons to destroy the sharknado that threatens the fleet, they succeed, but Bryan, back as a man, is left behind. The group next travel to the Wild West, Fin is arrest by the local sheriff (Dee Snider) for allowing Billy the Kid (Jonathan Bennett) to escape, Nova and April are saved from an oncoming sharknado by Skye (Vivica A. Fox), also brought back to life by Gil. They realise they cannot alter Gil's journey through time, or they will interfere with his search for his parents, it will stop, and time events will not occur if they do. They use the head of Robot April (also Reid) to zap the sharknado and use a railroad train to create the next time portal. The end up on a beach in the 1950s, as a new sharknado forms, Fin encounters younger versions of his parents Gilbert (Dean McDermott) and Raye (Tori Spelling), he then surfs and destroys the sharknado with a ray gun. The group intend to travel back to 2013, when the first sharknado formed in their time, but Nova sabotages the capacitator to travel back to 1997, where she wants to save her grandfather (Christopher Knight) from being killed in the shark attack that traumatized her as a child. Fin has warned her of the consequences altering events from history, including her personal timeline, but she ignores him, rescues her grandfather, and ends up eaten by a shark herself, along with April, and Robot April's head is lost in the ocean. Devastated, Fin and Skye decide to continue to the year 2013, but they wind up accidentally travelling far into the future, to the year 20013, where they find Robot April has become supreme ruler, in a world ruined by sharknados, and armies of clones and flying, robotic sharks. Robot April explains she manipulated their time travel, after her head was found at sea, she felt abandoned for 20,000 years, she freezes Skye in carbonite and tries to convince Fin to be with her. Fin refuses and she tortures him, but human April was revived by Robot April, she wakes and intervenes, the two Aprils fight. Fin uses the time machine Robot April built to travel to 2013, he lands on the boat Captain Carlos Santiago (Israel Sáez de Miguel), at the moment the true first sharknado forms. They work together to battle the sharknado with aid from Robot April's head, which Santiago recovered, preventing her from turning evil. But Robot April of the future arrives, her struggle with Fin inside the sharknado causes time to begin collapsing, resulting in a "timenado", causing historical figures like Cleopatra (La Toya Jackson) and Adolf Hitler to all appear together, threatening to destroy the universe. The present-day Robot April's head helps Fin finally destroy her future self, and he triggers her nuclear reset failsafe, causing an explosion that kills them and the sharknado, and stitches time back together, creating a new timeline. In the new, sharknado-free timeline, all of the Shepard family and friends are alive, they are running the bar, and April is pregnant with Gil. Skye is on television and has become a politician and a leading presidential candidate, and Fin's daughter Claudia (Ryan Newman) delivers Fin a letter from his father who is in space. Fin plans to retire to Kansas with April and Gil, he delivers an emotional farewell speech to his friends and family. April goes into labour, and everyone rushes out of the bar to head to the hospital. As they leave, The Today Show with Al Roker is on television, he reports that there are no clouds in the sky at all, an occurrence that will likely never happen again, but warns there may be a tsunami of alligators, but these are less of a threat than sharks. Also starring Brendan Petrizzo as Hologram Gil, M. Steven Felty as D. Brown and Voice of Hologram Gil, Matie Moncea as Gil on Dinosaur, Tiberiu Hansan as Medieval Gil, American Pie's Chris Owen as 30-Year-Old Gil, Aladdin's Gilbert Gottfried as Rand McDonald, Ron McDonald's father, Anthony C. Ferrante (the film's director) as Quint Singer, James Hong as Confucius, Eileen Davidson as Marie Antoinette, Shad Gaspard as Muhammad Ali, Patrick Labyorteaux as Julius Caesar, Gary Busey as Wilford Wexler and Bo Derek as May Wexler. It's pointless mentioning any acting "talent" in the film, there are some well-known faces who don't mind humiliating themselves (deliberately of course), like the other five films it is intentionally trashy and ridiculous, the special effects are cheap and unconvincing, I did not titter at any point like I may have a little in previous entries, there are obvious spoof references, e.g. 2001: A Space Odyssey, Back to the Future, Planet of the Apes ("Planet of the Aprils"), Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back, The Princess Bride, it is knowingly ridiculous and idiotic, I am truly relieved there will be no more of these movies that are a complete waste of time, as the title says "It's About Time", a final unintelligent science-fiction horror. Poor!
