MrVB

IMDb member since April 1999
    Lifetime Total
    25+
    IMDb Member
    25 years

Reviews

Do It for Uncle Manny
(2002)

Do It For Yourself
Good story. The film is funny without being vulgar and excellent chemistry between all the characters. Kari Wuhrer is probably the big draw but you ain't gonna see too much of her, as in her anatomy; you don't have to as the film doesn't, and DOESN'T HAVE TO, rely on titillation.

The progression of the film makes sense and I loved the Camaraderie between the characters. There are many moments that are totally unexpected, but in a very clever manner.

The ending has a few TINY cop-out moments, but overall a very satisfying experience.

The Hills Have Eyes
(2006)

"Wrong Turn" gone Wrong
As the film is "spoiled", so is my review full of Spoilers.

I must admit up front that I gave up after an hour. Of course, I was hoping the family would be massacred before my boredom threshold was reached, but no such luck.

There is nothing subtle about this film regarding character development, plotting or "creation" of suspense, of which there is absolutely no suspense whatsoever. We are deluged almost from the start with interactions between family members and all too soon get to meet, in daylight, the evil radiation diseased coal-mining monsters.

First of all, I don't really give a hoot about this boring family, but the director apparently coerced the screen writers to pad this film to the hilt giving us all the clichéd characters under the sun. The family is a caricature of the generation gap and political polarization which has existed since before the Constitution was written up.

Let's see, the dad's a private eye who haphazardly fires his gun at oxygen molecules and then gets into a vehicle during a duress causing scenario, in the dark of night, without looking in the back seat first. Brilliant screen writing, but I was bored to tears way before this scene.

Oh yes, let's not forget that mister private eye, whose job it is to find people, has led his family into a completely deserted desert which was used by the government for atomic weapons testing.

The son, influenced by his father's gun-toting antics, is portrayed as freaked out after finding one of his dogs guts ripped open and yet wanders off the main "camp site" alone, at night, without his gun.

The mentally deranged gas-station attendant has, gasp, almost no teeth and looks not at all affected by radiation poisoning like the others of his ilk do. Mr. gas-pump spends about 10 really dull minutes with the family pumping their vehicle with gasoline, and telling them exactly how to proceed to their destination. After an impromptu scene where he suspects they might find out he's a deranged gas-pump attendant with cannibalistic tendencies, he then proceeds to guide the family in the direct opposite direction. And Mr. private eye listens!

By the way, who delivers the gasoline to the gas-station in the middle of an area abandoned by and forbidden by the U.S. government? Who delivers the food and drinks to this diner in no man's land?

The nuclear coal-mining victims are portrayed as wild, mindless cannibals, yet know how to fire weapons, gut out dogs and outwit stupid families who listen to the gas-stop attendant who thankfully finally shoots his brains out almost half-way through the film.

The son-in-law is a peace loving democrat who sells cell phones and won't pick up a gun, but will venture out, at night, without a gun, to search for mr. private eye with mr. private eye's son.

Apparently, my suspension of disbelief failed me.

The Last Dragon
(1985)

Good fun and VANITY!
I saw this about 4 or 5 times when it first came out.

Good production, plot, dialog, acting, choreography, music and the luscious Vanity!

Has worn well with time.

H.O.T.S.
(1979)

Best Of The Genre
It's not Citizen Kane, but it does deliver. Cleavage, and lots of it.

Badly acted and directed, poorly scripted. Who cares? I didn't watch it for the dialog.

Modesty Blaise
(1966)

Huh?
Warning: Those who watch 60's movies while under the influence of mind alteringing chemicals will not appreciate this review.

Where's the movie? Where's the plot? Where's the dialog, the acting, the sound editing? This piece of garbage is a COMPLETE waste of time and deserved to bomb at the box office.

NOTHING in this film makes any sense. I can barely understand a word anyone is murmuring. I've seen The Crying Game, Educating Rita, A Hard Day's Night and I've made it through the accents. Modesty Blaise is a complete drug trip. You can't blame the direction when there's no movie in the first place.

People compare this badly compiled montage to Austin Powers? Forget Modesty Blaise (Monica Vitti) and Mrs. Fothergill (Rossella Falk); Irma Eckman (Elke Sommer) in Deadlier Than The Male completely blows them away.

Somebody...ANYBODY...Find the master print and burn it!

Secrets & Lies
(1996)

A Waste of Good Acting
Time is precious. This film isn't. I must learn to ignore critics who rave about small films like Fargo and this complete waste of time.

The theater was packed and everyone left with the same reaction: Is this the film the critics are raving about? What a piece of crap!

The hook of this film is the upwardly mobile black daughter seeking out and finding her white trash family. Get it?

The acting is superb.

The production (lighting, sets, editing, sound) is about 2 steps above a 60 minutes story. The characters are shallow and unintelligent. I was insulted by the fact that these people could not figure out about each other what was blatantly obvious to the audience; the audience was murmuring to the movie screen what the characters should say next.

I have had more fun doing the laundry.

Star Trek: The Next Generation: All Good Things...
(1994)
Episode 25, Season 7

The movies should be this good
Along with "Yesterday's Enterprise", "I Borg", "The Inner Light" and "Tapestry", among the very best of the ST:TNG episodes.

Only one MAJOR technical glitch (for those of you who remember the episode). The current Enterprise travels back to the space anomaly to prove time is moving backwards. If so, the space anomaly should NOT have been visible because it didn't exist BEFORE the photon torpedo was fired.

Superbly produced, written, directed, acted; thought provoking. This is the BEST last episode of ANY series.

The Crying Game
(1992)

What's The Point?
I don't have to go into the details of this pointless, meandering movie because just about every human being on the face of the planet was conned into believing (thanks to the critics) that this was a modern day Gone With The Wind.

The production, direction, editing, sound and acting are superb, but what is the point of the story (is there a story?). This film is like a day in the life of...what? A man can learn to question his own sexuality or accept other people's alternative life styles?

Before I forget. The scene. You know. THAT scene. As soon as Dil shows up I whisper in my wife's ear, "That is one masculine looking chick". I was shocked but it takes more that a one second scene to make an entire movie.

The film reminded me of 2001: A Space Odyssey (a great film). Not because of the film itself, but because of people's reaction. People need to rationalize paying a baby sitter, a movie, popcorn and a soda, so for days after seeing this people were actually having discussions of the films meaning.

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
(1999)

Pleasantly surprised
Caveat: I do NOT worship the "Star Wars: Trilogy". I appreciate the SUPERB special effects but I also appreciate a well thought out story-line, good dialog and acting, which I felt were sorely lacking in Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back.

I waited 6 weeks before seeing the Phantom Menace and was expecting to react the same way I react to a new James Bond movie; all that money and no movie!

Well, I was shocked. This is not only a very good sci-fi movie but a damn good movie in general.

Good points:

1] The movie moves the characters from local to local for good reasons.

2] the direction is well above average, with Liam Neeson turning in a superb performance (he has an amazing presence which at the same time doesn't keep telling you, "Hey, isn't that guy Liam Neeson?").

3] The dialog goes well above, "We are conquering your planet because our guns are bigger than yours".

Star Wars fans complain about Queen Amidala (Natalie Portman) being so "proper" compared to Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher); that's like comparing Captain Kirk (William Shatner) to Captain Picard (Patrick Stewart). In real life, Princess Leia would be a COMPLETE anomaly in regards to the way a princess, so to speak (Oh man, I'm actually taking this nonsense seriously!), would behave.

The movie does have several weak points:

1] The absolute funniest moment in the movie follows when Qui-Gon Jinn (Liam Neeson) and Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) realize they are about to be ambushed in the conference room. There's a sequence where they are seen, from a distance, jumping from a hole in the wall into a large warehouse area. It looks like two jelly beans being abruptly plopped. I mentioned this to several hard-core Star Wars fans who, in retrospect, remembered the scene, and went into convulsions laughing.

2] Jar Jar Binks is a one dimensional, and very NOT funny, joke, and completely unnecessary (I really didn't want to have to translate his broken English while I'm trying to sit back and enjoy a movie).

3] There's way too much time spent on Anakin Skywalker's home planet (but then George Lucas would have had to cut at least 40 minutes out of the movie).

4] Samuel L. Jackson's acting is completely embarrassing (really, look at him staring blankly into the camera during the Jedi council meetings). Samuel L. Jackson is quoted in People as begging George Lucas to cast in him in the Phantom Menace; I guess by the time the cameras started filming, George Lucas was too embarrassed to tell him how bad his acting was and that he should leave while he's ahead of himself.

5] The special effects are VISUALLY impressive but, overall, not IMAGINATIVE. There's no object morphing that made me say, "Wow, I wouldn't have thought of that!". One possible exception is the Federation Council room consisting of floating platforms.

The "Star Wars Myth" aside, I enjoyed this movie. In MY opinion, a movie has to stand it's own merits, and not be held up to a "cult following" status.

Apollo 13
(1995)

A Masterpiece
The danger of a really big film is the more a producer and director try to accomplish, the larger the opportunity to miss hitting the target.

This film hits one bullseye after another. The production, direction, acting and dialog are nothing short of brilliant. After all, Failure is NOT an option!

What blew me away was the portrayal of technology while making the audience truly care about the characters and even though we knew the ending, the audience still gasped when we heard Apollo announce a safe entrance into Earth's atmosphere.

Star Trek: The Next Generation: Encounter at Farpoint
(1987)
Episode 1, Season 1

Dismissed!!!
I have been a rabid Star Trek fan since 1966. Still am. One thing I learned from Star Trek is that the special effects are secondary to the characters. Encounter At Farpoint fails in its mission.

Superbly produced.

POORLY directed, written, acted. D.C. Fontana really blew this one. This episode is so embarrassing the master tape should be burned.

The first half of the first season didn't fare much better.

The Big Store
(1941)

Fast-forward when The Marx Brothers are not on the screen
Same old note: The Marx Brothers INGENIOUSLY twist any phrase or object into HILARITY.

Unfortunately, this film has a plot.

The usual hilarity when The Marx Brothers are left to their own devices, but too much screen time not dedicated to The Marx Brothers.

NOTE: If you have a heart-beat and love to laugh yourself silly, you MUST see Horse Feathers, Duck Soup, The Coconuts and Monkey Business.

Duck Soup
(1933)

The 2nd funniest comedy ever made (after Horse Feathers)
I apologize up front. My comments for Duck Soup will be the same as Horse Feathers and The Coconuts as these are the 3 funniest movies ever made the by the 3 funniest people ever to grace this planet.

What's there to say? Three brothers wield their TIMELESS comedic and musical GENIUS before the cameras. In this film The Marx Brother go to War. The Marx Brothers go to WAR (Duck Soup)!? The Marx Brother go to COLLEGE (Horse Feathers)!?The Marx Brothers take over a hotel (The Coconuts)!? Who CARES? The story-line DOESN'T matter. The Marx Brothers INGENIOUSLY twist any phrase or object into HILARITY.

Duck Soup and The Coconuts are SLIGHTLY edged out by Horse Feathers (the most brilliant display of the Marx Brothers genius).

If they made only these three films they would still be hailed as the greatest comedic geniuses of all time.

Horse Feathers
(1932)

THE funniest comedy ever made
What's there to say? Three brothers wield their TIMELESS comedic and musical GENIUS before the cameras. In this film The Marx Brother go to college. The Marx Brother go to COLLEGE (Horse Feathers)!? The Marx Brothers go to WAR (Duck Soup)!? The Marx Brothers take over a hotel (The Coconuts)!? Who CARES? The story-line DOESN'T matter. The Marx Brothers INGENIOUSLY twist any phrase or object into HILARITY.

Horse Feathers SLIGHTLY edges out Duck Soup and The Coconuts as the most brilliant display of the Marx Brothers genius.

If they made only these three films they would still be hailed as the greatest comedic geniuses of all time.

Monkey Business
(1931)

You'll laugh till it hurts!!!
It's almost IMPOSSIBLE to comment on the best Marx Brothers films because nothing matters except The Marx Brothers. They are The Beatles of comedy; or are The Beatles the Marx Brother of MUSIC? The Marx Brothers INGENIOUSLY twist any phrase or object into HILARITY.

One warning: When watching a Marx Brothers film with a plot (you know, other characters that you can COMPLETLEY ignore), do yourself a favor and fast-forward past what should have been left on the cutting room floor.

NOTE: If you have a heart-beat and love to laugh yourself silly, you MUST see Horse Feathers, Duck Soup, The Coconuts and Monkey Business.

The Cocoanuts
(1929)

The 2nd funniest comedy ever made (after Horse Feathers)
I apologize up front. My comments for The Cocoanuts will be the same as Horse Feathers and Duck Soup as these are the 3 funniest movies ever made the by the 3 funniest people ever to grace this planet.

What's there to say? Three brothers wield their TIMELESS comedic and musical GENIUS before the cameras. In this film The Marx Brother take over a hotel. The Marx Brothers take over a hotel (The Cocoanuts)!? The Marx Brother go to COLLEGE (Horse Feathers)!? The Marx Brothers go to War (Duck Soup)!? Who CARES? The story-line DOESN'T matter. The Marx Brothers INGENIOUSLY twist any phrase or object into HILARITY.

The Coconuts and Duck Soup are SLIGHTLY edged out by Horse Feathers (the most brilliant display of the Marx Brothers genius).

If they made only these three films they would still be hailed as the greatest comedic geniuses of all time.

Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
(1983)

Best of the Star Wars Trilogy
If you think Star Wars is one of the greatest movies ever made, read no further. If you enjoy well made films of the sci-fi genre as well as other genres, read on.

One of the things I look for in a film is progression. Why are the characters moving from one place to another? How are the characters developing throughout the film.

Star Wars and The Empire Strike Back FAIL on both counts. Yes, they have great special effects but to a person looking beyond the visuals; for plot, character and dialog they are both MAJOR disappointments. Return Of The Jedi succeeds FULLY in plot development and PARTIALLY in terms of character development.

The hero, and by far the most likable character, of this series winds up being Hans Solo. Luke Skywalker is rendered as an ineffectual emotionless cardboard character who accomplishes virtually nothing in both The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi. Star Wars fans hate hearing that Luke Skywalker is useless in this film; they defend him by offering his redemption of his father. Ooh, how original! How many PIRATE films have used this plot device countless times? Darth Vader is a COMPLETE wuss as he is TOTALLY subservient to The Emperor.

Most people argue that the opening sequence is a waste of time and has nothing to do with the main story. Well perhaps, but then the film would have been 20 minutes shorter and everyone would have complained about THAT. I propose that Star Wars has at least 30 minutes of boring footage (Sand dunes, sand dunes, sand dunes. YAWN!) and The Empire Strikes Back should have advertised as "Sci-Fi Fans ONLY Need View".

The Ewoks are fine. Remember, George Lucas had lots of cash to spend and you see it on the screen.

Ms .45
(1981)

Disturbing Rape Study
Well produced, directed, written, acted, study of rape. Displays her progression from horror to revenge to delusional homicide.

She is snatched into an alleyway where she is violently assaulted and raped. She then meanders to her apartment, not realizing it is being burglarized. She is sitting on the couch trying to cope with her rape when the burglar appears before her, and discovering that she is mute, proceeds to rape her at gunpoint, knowing that she can't call for help. During the rape she kills him by striking his head with a blunt instrument and then with an iron. She now has possession of a .45.

Without detailing the entire film, she begins by killing out of fear and anger. Her next step is baiting rapists. After suffering from persistent flashbacks she pursues any man she sees touching a woman. She then progresses into seducing and killing men.

Slight problems I ignored via suspension of disbelief: Where DOES she get all those bullets? She makes sounds while barfing and actually mutters her friends name at the end; Histrionic device or was her muteness a sign of emotional instability in the first place?

Ignore any titillatng VHS covers or advertisements; this is neither Gone With The Wind nor Porky's. Does one HAVE to see this movie? No. Will one have wasted one's time if one SEES this movie? No.

Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
(1980)

Live Comic Book for Sci-Fi Lovers Only
A good live COMIC BOOK SCI-FI film as opposed to a good film. Lots of special effects, costumes, aliens, sophomoric dialog and cardboard acting. Great, daring film in its time. Great film for sci-fi lovers who will watch anything sci-fi because it had a tremendous budget and didn't skimp on production values.

Boring to a mature viewer who enjoys other genres as well as sci-fi. Overly violent, illogically sequenced; this is the weak link in the Star Wars saga.

Killing Time
(1998)

A good opportunity blown
The picture on the video is pretty intriguing. Slender, long legged girl wearing a skin tight suit holding two guns. Ah! A sexy femme-fatale flick! Nope! Not even close.

This film commits the worst sin that an action femme-fatale movie could ever commit: The girl is incredibly average looking and has absolutley no charisma. Every guy in the movie drools over her. Why? Had they been stranded on a desert island for ten years before they saw her?

The production is decent, the storyline is actually quite clever, the acting overall is not bad, but my suspension of disbelief in this indestrucable assassin (due to her physical attributes, as the film makes quite explicit) is not so strong that I would ever find her that attractive.

By the way, the sound is horrible.

Fargo
(1996)

Yawn!!!
The interwoven 1/3 of the movie that deals with crime and pursuit is OK. The plot is on the level of the average weekly cop show, the direction is so casual you can slip into a coma, the acting is OK and the dialog is uninspired. There's a bit of violence.

A VERY average made for TV movie. I really don't know what all the fuss was about.

Star Wars
(1977)

Overrated and BORING!!!
I watched Star Trek the first time around from 1966 to 1968. Then poof. Low ratings. No more Star Trek. Every now and then an oasis (such as 2001 or Soylent Green) would pop up and temporarily satiate my apetite for good sci-fi.

Then...Star Wars!!! Man, was my adreneline pumping! I went to the theatre, plucked down my money and was blown away by the special effects, the story, the FORCE!!!

Well...it's 30 years later and I realize it takes about an hour and a half for Star Wars to start. The effects are still great (I judge movies by when they were produced, not by today's standards) but the script is drawn out (how many sand dunes do I REALLY want to see), the dialog is not quite as witty as I remember (though some of the quips between Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher are still quite amusing) and the space battles are very badly editted.

Yes, Harrison Ford became a mega-star which I do not at all attribute to Star Wars because Mark Hamill's career went absolutley nowhere and Carrie Fisher only managed to pop up in a Woody Allen film (sorry, can't remember which one).

All in all, it's not Gone With The Wind or Citizen Kane or 12 Angry Men. It's just an average movie that was produced when the genre was considered too risky for studios to pump money into it's production.

See Return Of The Jedi or Phantom Menace; they're more fun.

12 Angry Men
(1957)

Black & white, no special effects. Just Brilliant!!!
The plot, production, direction, dialog, acting! 90 minutes of brilliance!!! I have seen this film 10 times or so in the last 35 years and it is without question the greatest film ever made!

See it!!!

Citizen Kane
(1941)

A Great Movie!
A brilliant plot whereby a reporter seeks the soul of a man who it ends up doesn't have one.

The drive to abandon a childhood of poverty and gain the world devours Charles Kane in his endless pursuit of wealth, fame and self-indulgence.

The direction is natural, the dialog is sharp and the cinematography is brilliant, even by today's standards. Orson Wells packs each scene with visual and sound effects, which grab the viewer and stimulate the imagination.

This is a character study meant to stimulate the intellect, not the emotions.

This is a great movie and certainly was one of the most daring movies ever made in its time.

As an aside: I saw this in film studies 18 years ago (egads, am I getting old!) and it's stunning on the big screen.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
(1991)

Excellent!!!
The best of the Classic series. Superior to The Wrath of Khan and The Voyage Home and on par with First Contact and any other science fiction film. Intelligent plot. Witty dialogue. Self-effacing humor throughout. Christopher Plummer is THE penultimate Trek villian. Superb special effects. Scotty, Uhura, Chekov and Captain Sulu are integral to the plot! Too be watched over and over again. All science fiction movies should be this well made.

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