smashthecontrolmachine

IMDb member since August 2011
    Highlights
    2012 Oscars
    Highlights
    2011 Oscars
    Highlights
    2010 Oscars
    Lifetime Total
    75+
    Lifetime Name
    1+
    IMDb Member
    12 years

Reviews

Saltburn
(2023)

rich in style, poor on substance
Here's a film that wants to pretend to convey a message, but try as you might to figure it out...and you will but it's not going to matter because the characters here are plastic, the set is overstated & furthermore the narrative gets lost (along with the dialog) in all this along the way. I feel bad for Barry Keoghan here as he is the one and only saving grace of this film yet even with his performance, still it remains lackluster at best. I think the many issues arise in that we have a cast of unlikable and often strange personalities that do not mesh well at all together and it just never seems to work.

Ich seh, Ich seh
(2014)

trauma paints it's own picture
What we have is characters dealing with enormous grief and anger issues, and also throw in the added element of lack of trust and it can become downright toxic. This movie at times becomes very unsettling to watch but I think it's necessary as we start to really see the unraveling of Elias, he doesn't know what to trust with his own eyes, he's at his wits end, he himself is feeling tortured so I think this is him deflecting that pain outward in way onto someone else. The darkness, shame, and violence pouring out of him towards the end becomes an inferno. He questions the truth and his own mind perhaps in those final moments.

Bullet Train
(2022)

Snakes 🐍 on A Train
This one blasts off from scene one, never letting up, while packing plenty of bite along the way. Humor, action, cleverness, and style. The best I have seen of Brad Pitt, he's the shining star here as Ladybug, but there are other notable stands out (let's hear it for 'the twins' Tangerine & Lemon) as prime examples played by none other than Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Brian Tyree Henry. Loved Sandra Bullock, too and hey even the snake was a stand out. It is a literal edge of your seat thrill ride that you won't ever wanna get off, so be sure to strap in for the ride of your life. I hope there is more to come.

Earthquake Bird
(2019)

hardly a tremor
I found this film to be not much more than a rather meandering, noir art house style mess if I'm honest. I don't like when a painfully slow paced movie drags on & on and at the end there's never any satisfying payoff. In my opinion, unfortunately- this was precisely the case here.

The Power of the Dog
(2021)

loneliness is the killer
Riddle me this, a film so carefully crafted, tightly weaved - almost intricately so, but yet never seeming so from any angle. I can't possibly convey to you the brilliance of Benedict's performance here, it's an all out masterclass. The riveting nature of his portrayal of Phil is just beyond. Pay attention to every scene, it is necessary here because you won't wanna miss a thing.

Siberia
(2018)

Baby, it's cold inside
Nothing to see here. The diamonds weren't the only blue things here in the drab, poor excuse for a spy caper that never manages to get itself up to speed. Keanu appeared as lost as the rest of the cast in this going nowhere sleeper of a flick, as he muddles through the scenes aimlessly, with little to no intensity. Who can blame Reeves though, the script was about as exciting as watching paint dry & the ending in & of itself - even worse!

The Killing of a Sacred Deer
(2017)

Eagle eye
I can't say enough about the stellar performance of Barry Keoghan here as Martin, but alas it wasn't enough to raise this film to the level it could have been. Certainly this movie will not be for everyone, and the way it is done will be deemed polarizing in most instances. It's a style all its own to be sure. I feel this way about it, without Barry this film would have been nothing, he was what carried this all the way for me. Aside from him, this flick is a bit too predictable in some ways and in other ways too relentlessly sluggish in its pacing.

Schwarze Insel
(2021)

Don't Stand So Close To Me
Despite a great performance by Jolene Andersen as Helena - I'm afraid this beautifully shot movie, the majority of which was filmed on Amrun (one of the North Frisian Islands on the German North Sea coast), still gets lost in translation. I really think this had so much potential, it certainly had an amazing backdrop, but a movie needs a lot more than this. It's still a very watchable film nonetheless, though never amounting to all that it could be.

Velvet Buzzsaw
(2019)

Dear John..
Let me start off with this film's flagrant under-use of John Malkovich, which is enough to give any viewer an 'art' attack. Now, aside from this, I will say most of the movie early on at least is a hot mess. It just seems to be trying to find itself, and in the process it was losing my interest. Nonetheless, I stuck with it, and it did eventually pick up some steam but by that time it was too little too late I'm afraid. The cast here was also far too pretentious (perhaps on purpose) for anyone to care what happens to them. It's tough to sell this kind of drama, when you can't connect with any of the characters on any level.

Non mi uccidere
(2021)

Ciao Baby
Here's the thing, while not a terrible movie, it's half baked & that's its biggest issue. It's your average stylish, film noir-esque bad romance zombie flick. It succeeds at some of these elements & in some ways it does it quite well, but in its attempts to check all the boxes, it falls short. I give it props for attempting to breathe new life (so to speak) into a played out genre. Its failure doesn't represent to me that its by any means a total disaster, it's certainly watchable, just not spectacular & certainly never amounting to all that it could be.

Tides
(2021)

birth control
Here we have a classic case of a film with an identity crisis. I don't know if the film ever truly got out of it's own way - between the obvious plot holes, cliché dialogue & banal flashbacks. I think what is clear here is that this mess of a script was never really going anywhere & since the movie couldn't decide what it wanted to be - it was just - there. A rather ineptly put together tale that's at times too perplexing for its own good and at other times, just plain half-baked.

Das Privileg
(2022)

kein Würfel
They tried to go somewhere here. There was an attempt to create some sort of story, some sort of intensity...there were even rumors of a plot dare I say? But alas, it was all an illusion. Not sure what exactly the director was going for here but if it was a hot mess then - nailed it! Look, a film of this genre (well really one of any genre) can have all the promise in the world, but if it's thrown onto the screen haphazardly audiences are gonna eventually see it for the muddle that it is. In all fairness, if this was spun a different way, and in not such a dysfunctional fashion - maybe it would have succeeded better... Naja.

Vile
(2011)

Saw Golightly
As my review title reads, it's Saw light & seeing as the soundtrack was written & peformed by Holly Golightly and The Brokeoffs, it also appears this is a broke/low budget version of a light Saw wannabe film. Nothing to see here, but I wasn't expecting much anyway. Bad acting, bad script, no potential, no build up, it just goes no where, and it does it slowly...I think the idea behind the film should have been to effectively entertain the viewers by torturing the characters in the movie - not by torturing the audience in the theater or in their homes, forced to have to watch this junk.

The Lighthouse
(2019)

a world without walls
I wish I could rate this higher than 10 cause I definitely would! Very few films truly live up to the word masterpiece as this one does. It's a slow build that is relentlessly effective, and crafted so expertly - the best compliment I can pay it is, before you know it you are entrenched in it, and you are living it. It's madness, it's twisted, it's enchanting, it's disturbing & it's brilliant. This is the sort of tale that defies explanation at times, but you don't mind because you're so ensconced in it that your brain doesn't need to process what it sees. When fantasy & reality are so perfectly inter-weaved, escape seems futile and pointless indeed.

The Farm
(2018)

you are what you eat
Look who's coming to dinner? We'll make a meal out of you yet! This one is interesting to say the least I think this one had potential, and it wasn't half bad actually. The point it was driving home, it did well. The dreadful atmosphere & vibe was also well crafted and detailed throughout. I suppose there were moments that I felt could have been pushed farther and ideas more thoroughly fleshed out (so to speak, of course). Nonetheless, it was entertaining & engaging enough to get a tasty 7 out of me.

A Quiet Place Part II
(2020)

speak softly & carry a big ...
I think Cillian Murphy in part saved this one. I saw some missed opportunities here, but overall it was entertaining. I felt that there were scenes here that were not as well developed & fully realized as they could be, and some of those were on the island. I can appreciate the suspense as this movie knows how to build it and deliver in that department. I hear A Quiet Place part 3 is a go, so let's see how that one unravels. I wasn't totally feeling the entire movie here as a whole truth be told but it packs enough of a punch in it's duration to satisfy fans of the first one.

El practicante
(2020)

take a seat...
This one had potential and it may have been going places at times, but then at other times it was just plodding along aimlessly. I can't say it was a terrible movie, but I can't say it was great either. The biggest issue I had with it was it's slow pacing, there's pacing yourself& then there's a snail tale. This film took its time to get to anything remotely gripping happening and then by that time, it was like - too little... too late.

Hostel: Part III
(2011)

All Bets Are Off?
I don't understand the hate. I am a fan of the first two. I agree this one is not up to par with those but that said I don't find it as bad as so many reviewers say. Less gore, yes it has that, however it doesn't take away from the film, instead you get dutifully curated scenes of splatter that matters. I found the character build to be decent, the story average but it was more developed then many films of this genre. Where this third installment succeeds most though is coming across as more believable & that in and of itself is a win, no matter how the cards are dealt.

Things Heard & Seen
(2021)

ship of fools
This one just doesn't go anywhere nor seemingly ever try to. There was perhaps some possibility here, some assemblence of a plot that could have amounted to something worth watching but in the end it's all for not because this lost story is just that - lost. Seyfried's performance is the only reason I am giving this a 3 because she does her best here, cast in this mess and her talents were otherwise wasted. She however couldn't save this & I imagine she did about all she could. I think the actual non ending to the film is rather befitting in a way...if not ironic as it was never really going anywhere anyway.

Truth or Dare
(2018)

cliché or dare
This one should be filed under 'd' for dumb. I kept waiting for it to get better, for it to become entertaining - for it to - well start and it never actually goes anywhere interesting. Ride the cliché, the old cliché into the ground - that's all this film manages to perfect the exception on. I mean I have seen my share of subpar scare movies but this one really can't even be classified as even well - scary. The overacting is shameful, the decision making is painfully predictable, this movie is a carbon copy of all the films like this that never work in this genre. If it hasn't worked 100x before & you use the same exact ingredients how can expect to come out any different...the answer is - surprise - it won't!

Afflicted
(2013)

Bloody Brilliant
This one starts a bit slow but once it gets going it really goes! There is some stunning camera work here and brutal scenes of which I wasn't expecting that were quite exemplary. This film is proof that mastering the art of horror & suspense doesn't require a large budget it simply needs creativity and wicked story line. Derek Lee is off the charts, his character transformation eclipses all expectations here. The action scenes are absolutely staggering, you feel like you are there almost - quite the visual feast. This is a must see and more importantly a must experience! Oh & stick around for the closing credits too.

Midnight Special
(2016)

nothing special
This was as dull as can be from start to finish sadly. I was the entire time waiting for something to happen to get the film going but it just never did. Sullen, boring characters - dark brooding environments and a mundane + lifeless script. This movie had it all when it comes to ingredients on how to make a bad picture. I actually found myself yawning & rubbing my eyes halfway through - it was just painful honestly.

The Worthy
(2016)

the Worthless
Don't see much of a point to this story honestly, I went into watching it not expecting much & well that's exactly what I got. Besides the fact that the plot (what there was of one) was subpar at best - the film itself just dragged on aimlessly & bleakly meandering along with no real sense of purpose or substance. I didn't get to the know any of the characters well enough to even care what happens to them therefore as the movie plods along I have zero connection to them or the peril they find themselves in. This is an empty tale with a nothing ending spun with no direction or proper pace.

Homunculus
(2021)

reel big fish
This one makes you think and I can appreciate that. It's not that the story is so unwieldy that it's implausible - actually in some ways this rings true but this is what ends up working to it's advantage. Some scenes border on the absurd but they are so stylistic that they illuminate the story in a uniquely innovative way. This film explores the potential of the human psyche (the totality of the human mind that helps us navigate through life). Furthermore it's a study on the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and the unconscious mind. Not every facet of this exploration is by any means precise or an exact science but this movie does on such a explorative scale that it's a riveting ride nonetheless so strap in & enjoy!

Death of Me
(2020)

cryptic twisty cautionary tale
I appreciate the attempt at Wicker Man like atmosphere this creepy story makes, and how Maggie really aces her role here. Tense, imaginitive dark film that teaches you to be careful what you drink, who you trust & what gifts you accept while on a remote foreign island.

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