jiggles-50181

IMDb member since November 2016
    Lifetime Total
    10+
    IMDb Member
    7 years

Reviews

Lou
(2022)

Old Lady Snuffs Out TWO Green Berets?!
A 70 year old lady beats up a giant Green Beret in hand to hand combat. I'm not even kidding. He kicks her 3 times to the gut, delivered 3 haymaker punches to her face, and then throws her against the wall. But don't worry! She somehow bests him with an empty can of soup. Lololol.

It was so bad that I burst out laughing hysterically. This woman would've had a legit broken face, broken ribs, and internal bleeding. This guy was a giant, trained in elite special forces and this woman is ancient? Just don't insult me. Now, if she got the drop on them and shot them...ok, maybe I can get with that, but a fight?

Obi-Wan Kenobi
(2022)

What a joke
Worst acting in history. The little girl ruins everything and a toddler must've written the script. It's just so dumb. So many plot holes. And the girl is supposed to be 10?! She looks 6 and sounds 3. She literally out runs multiple adults several times. I feel unclean after watching it and I need to get to confession.

Cheaper by the Dozen
(2022)

I'd give it zero stars if possible.
I knew I was in trouble when I saw the Black Lives Matter sign in the window of the opening scene. I have no issue with BLM, none at all, but it clearly showed what direction the film was heading. The white people are ALL idiots. All of them. Of course there's the obligatory goofy white man trying to dance, the white police officer offending the black woman, and pretty much every other liberal in your face nonsense. It's all forced and so cringe. What did we learn? White people are bad.

One Magic Christmas
(1985)

Holiday Magic
Watch it every year and cry every time. Reminds me of being a child and watching movies with my mother and father. Give it a chance and watch until the end.

Ragnarok
(2020)

Something different...in a good way.
Ok, so you probably know this is a foreign show, so you'll have to be ok with dubbed English. It's a rather slow burn and I'm having fun with it. Give it a try if you want something different.

Max Payne
(2008)

It's just so boring and dumb
Title says it all. There's simply nothing to this movie. It's just another "somebody killed my family and I'm dark and miserable while I get revenge" film. The acting is dull and everyone speaks monotone with no feelings. Lord this movie stinks.

The Last of the Mohicans
(1992)

"Someday I fear you and I will have a serious disagreement."
I can watch this over and over again. Daniel Day Lewis is captivating and the action builds and builds. The music is absolutely fantastic and this is the perfect movie to get lost in for a while.

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
(1999)

Shameful
I don't understand how awful movies like this actually get created. Don't directors watch the movie as it's being developed? Don't people tell them how atrocious it is? The acting is soulless and abysmal. The plot dumb. And the droids now have childish personalities for whatever reason. Shame on you, George Lucas.

Broadchurch
(2013)

As good as it gets.
It's somber, beautiful, thoughtful, and impossibly well done. You won't find better.

Belzebuth
(2017)

Cheap, predictable, and boring
This movie appears to be made by a high school film group. The acting is absolutely deplorable. It's painful.

Downhill
(2020)

Rather be waterboarded
What I don't understand is how people get paid to make stuff like this. Not only that, these actors, directors, and producers earn a LOT of money. It literally infuriates me. This movie was SO INCREDIBLY TERRIBLE that I am now shopping for multiple therapists to tackle a myriad of conditions developed as a result of watching this film.

To say I loathe this film is an understatement. I honestly believe anybody associated with it should be held criminally liable for the product they made and the resulting physical and mental afflictions caused. During the entire film I kept waiting for the wife to get struck down by some cataclysmic event so the suffering would stop.

If you're reading this, maybe it's not too late for you. Perhaps you've been spared. If you don't heed my advice I can't be held responsible for your fate. You will know pain. You will experience torment. You will be absolutely HAUNTED for the duration of your now meaningless life.

The Curse of La Llorona
(2019)

It's nothing new but watchable
You've seen it all before, but as long as you aren't expecting greatness, it's watchable.

Man of Steel
(2013)

Better than I expected
It's not perfect but it's a dang good movie. Cavill is ideal for the role and the rest of the cast is solid. The movie drags on a bit but it's finally a Superman movie worth your time.

Allegiant
(2016)

Painful, miserable, and thank God it's over
I don't even know where to begin. This movie made no sense, it was literally painful to watch, and the script must've been written by a 12 year old on drugs. It's...just...so...bad.

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