Billy Crystal Poster

Quotes (5)

  • Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
  • In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is, the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
  • [on hosting the Academy Awards] Whatever your approach, the world is a rough room. And it's a big room. Not everybody is going to like what you have to say. But when you're up there, look like you want to be there. You're the captain of show business that night. That's your job.
  • My first trip into the men's room at Yankee Stadium was when I was 8. Not being very tall, I was at eye level to a pretty horrible sight. They had these troughs. Everyone was standing over them. It was like all the horses in the lineup at the Kentucky Derby-like the wall would open and they'd all start running. It was awful. I couldn't pee in public restrooms until I was 39.
  • [on his life as a university student] I have to admit I was a little bit of a misfit. I was a film directing major at NYU - I'm still not sure why I became a directing major when I was really an actor and a comedian. It was a class of film people and my professor was Marty [Martin Scorsese]. Mr. Scorsese, as I called him, which I still do when I see him because he gave me a C.