Eddie Cantor Poster

Quotes (15)

  • [after attending the premiere of the film The Eddie Cantor Story (1953)] If that was my life, I didn't live.
  • [commenting about losing most of his money in the 1929 stock market crash] Well, folks, they got me in the market just like they got everybody else. In fact, they're not calling it the stock market any more. They're calling it the stuck market.
  • [on Al Jolson] He was more than just a singer or an actor. He was an experience.
  • It takes twenty years to make an overnight success.
  • We call our relatives the kin we love to touch.
  • When I see the "Ten Most Wanted" lists I always have this thought: If we made them feel wanted earlier, they wouldn't be wanted now.
  • Marriage is an attempt to solve problems together which you didn't have when you were on your own.
  • Slow down and enjoy life. It's not only the scenery you miss by going too fast--you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.
  • A wedding is a funeral where you smell your own flowers.
  • [on his vaudeville days] When [George Jessel] and I were not acting, we were playing. We had no outside games or diversions, so all our fun had to be born of the theatre. On one occasion we ruined a perfectly boring mystery thriller. Just as the distracted father cried, "Where is my daughter?" we walked across the stage behind him, both of us in black-face, with brooms slung across our shoulders. The audience broke into laughter and the actors of the piece were mystified, instead of the audience. On another occasion we found that a newcomer to our act, a little girl violinist, was getting more applause than was healthy for her. The next night when she took her bow we were right beside her, each of us with a violin of his own, and shared the hand. Another time, as she finished her number, I suddenly appeared in one of the boxes of the theatre and began a campaign speech: "Ladies and gentlemen- If I am elected the public monies will be safe. I will guard them and keep them. You'll have nothing to worry about". A distraction like this always brought a laugh and diverted some applause.
  • It doesn't matter how much the boss likes you, you can't work in a bank and take home samples.
  • Lovely girl. Lovely family. Her poor father died of throat trouble. They hung him.
  • All women are natural born espionage agents.
  • [on blackface] I don't myself quite understand why people will laugh more at a joke delivered in blackface than the same wheeze without the burnt cork. But they do.
  • [on blackface] I do the same stuff with it or without it, but folks have me pegged as a blackface man and a blackface man I've got to be.