Being pragmatic about it, you can’t blame the producers of espionage series “Matador” for trading the stodgy old tennis circuit in “I Spy” for a growth sport like soccer – especially (and opportunistically) coming out of World Cup mania. But this latest original offering from Robert Rodriguez’s El Rey Network comes in so wide of its gooooal of approximating an old-fashioned spy yarn as to practically border on parody. Gabriel Luna plays a DEA agent who is drafted to go undercover as a professional soccer player, but the resulting pilot is about as exciting as its opening slow-motion chase. More marketable than watchable, “Matador” is worth sidestepping.

Luna’s Tony “Matador” Bravo is introduced in the midst of a sting operation, in which he runs down a suspect (never mind the bad guy’s awful German accent) despite having consumed several tequila shots. This catches the attention of the...