Both its release date (March 2020) and subject matter conspired to make Spanish thriller The Platform a pandemic mega-hit for Netflix four years ago. The streaming giant will be hoping that this follow-up — which hurls us back into the nightmarish tower-block prison dubbed ‘The Pit’ — might bank similar record-breaking viewing-figure returns. Sadly, on the strength of the film's quality alone, that seems unlikely.

Before we get to the meat of this confounding sequel-or-is-it-a-prequel (more on that confusion in a moment), a brief recap for those who might have missed the first outing. The Pit — also known by its more PR-friendly title ‘The Vertical Self-Management Centre’ — is a 333-floor jail, featuring two cellmates per floor. Once a day, a floating platform containing a vast, medieval-style banquet descends from the very top to the very bottom, stopping briefly at each floor. Inmates are permitted to gorge themselves on as much grub as they can while it's there,...