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  • That's one of Jack Duffy's lines to the character played by Julian Eltinge, probably the best drag performer of the 20th century, who was so good that's there was a Broadway theater named for him that survived until the reconstruction of Times Square in the 1990s -- the theater is still there, the name has changed.

    People familiar with Christie short comedies of the 1920s, in which the plots were little more than set-ups for the gags, will be pleasantly surprised at how well their house actors, who always played 'types' in those short films, adapt to the feature film. Structurally the writers have taken Eltinge's stage success, "Madame Lucy" and translated it well for the screen, keeping the action largely the same and substituting comic chases for dialogue -- while retaining the shock value of Eltinge in drag kissing Ann Pennington and vamping Stanhope Wheatcroft.

    The story is powered by two sets of conflicts: Eltinge, a penniless architect, and Wheatcroft both want to marry Pennington, and Duffy and Lionel Belmore are in a lawsuit, each anxious to marry the female witness to an accident, to determine her ability to testify. Naturally they think Eltinge in drag is that woman....

    Anyway, once Eltinge is in drag, the various mistaken lecheries are the jokes and, like CHARLEY'S AUNT -- which the Christies made with Eltinge the same year -- everyone performs very well, and the usual Christie gag sequences take on their own lunatic logic -- the sight of Jack Duffy, who specialized in playing geezers at a young age, dancing with Eltinge in a dress and beard is sure to break up any audience with laughter.
  • Julian Eltinge began his career as a female impersonator in boyhood, and made a living at it for a long time. His act appealed primarily to women, who were impressed by the fashionable frocks and gowns that Eltinge wore onstage and the grace and beauty of his female impersonations. (Some women asked him for his beauty secrets!) Eltinge went to considerable trouble for his female characterisations (such as shaving his fingers) but was, by all accounts, not effeminate in his own behaviour. Even so, male theatregoers generally disliked him.

    Eltinge was well aware that audiences might question the motives of a male performer who voluntarily dressed as a woman. He typically starred in drawing-room comedies as a robust he-man who (for some implausible reason) reluctantly wears female disguise to achieve some short-term goal, but who is anxious to get out of skirts and back into trousers as soon as possible. A typical Eltinge bit of comedy went like this: briefly finding himself alone onstage in female disguise, he would yank off his wig and fling it onto a table, then he would light up a cigar and say something like "What a relief!" in his normal male voice ... just as the door opened and someone started to enter. Quickly, Eltinge would snatch his wig and put it on again, speaking in a female voice and resuming his she-identity just in time to avoid discovery, while trying to hide the lit cigar. Eltinge sometimes played biological females: in one marital farce, he played the bride, the groom AND the other woman!

    "Madame Behave" stars Eltinge as handsome architect Jack Mitchell, who lives in a luxury flat with a male room-mate (hmm...) but who is nonetheless courting beautiful young Gwen Townley (Ann Pennington). Jack's rival for Gwen's affections is wealthy Percy Fairweather (played by Stanhope Wheatcroft). Jack's flatmate is Dick Morgan (David James), a wastrel who has squandered his inheritance. Dick and Jack are both broke: Dick doesn't have jack, and Jack doesn't have ... well, they're broke.

    The elderly landlord is named M.T. House (ouch!). When he learns that Jack and Dick don't have the rent money, he vows to evict them. Meanwhile, M.T. House is suing Dick's uncle Seth Corwin, who injured him in a motor accident. The only witness was a mysterious young woman named Madam Brown, who can't be located. Whichever man she favours in her testimony will win the lawsuit. Corwin and House both hit on the same scheme: to find Madam Brown and propose marriage to her, figuring that a wife can't testify against her husband. (Sorry, lads: a wife can't be *compelled* to testify against her husband, but she can testify against him if she wants to.) Both men separately rush off to Madam Brown's last known address, intending to propose to her.

    Jack, of course, decides to disguise himself as Madam Brown. Somehow he easily gets hold of an extensive female wardrobe in his size, plus wig and shoes and make-up ... even though he doesn't have any money. (Maybe Jack and Dick just had all these things handy in their bachelor flat. Hmmm...) Eltinge, wearing 1920s fashions, makes a surprisingly fetching woman in his Madam Brown disguise. For some implausible reason, Eltinge passes himself off as the lady witness and fends off marriage proposals from both men. Meanwhile, Jack is trying to promote the cash to buy an engagement ring so that he can ask Gwen to marry him. (Yes, Jack, she'll marry you in a second when she sees how pretty you look in that dress.)

    All logic and plausibility flies out the window. The climax of the film features burly actor Tom Wilson in a dress, looking much less convincing than Eltinge. The performances are good. Lionel Belmore (an underrated actor who starred in Erich von Stroheim's 'Greed') is funny in a rare comedy role as uncle Seth. The landlord is played by Jack Duffy, a youngish actor who had a long career playing toothless old codgers. (Duffy was skilled with make-up and wore dentures offscreen, but took them out for his old-man roles.) The scenes between Duffy and 'Madam Brown' are uncanny: two young men are playing an old man and a beautiful woman, and they both look rather convincing!

    In real life, Eltinge invested his money badly and ended up broke. In his later years, when he could no longer play attractive young women, he tried one last comeback in California, hoping to do a nightclub act dressed in some of his female finery. But the local ordinances prohibited men from wearing female clothing in public. Eltinge was forced to do his act in (male) evening attire, alongside a clothes rack of female costumes. He would exhibit each one in turn, describe the show in which he'd worn it, and do a brief scene in female character while remaining in male garb. The act was not a success.

    "Madam Behave" is an amusing farce and a good record of a stage performer who was once very popular. (A Broadway theatre was named after Eltinge.) I'll rate this movie 6 out of 10 ... but it's no "Some Like it Hot".