Patch Gallagher: Yes, yes, yes, the top spot. Where if you drop, you've got twice as far to fall. Maybe I'm a sap for trying. And maybe I can make something out of you, if you can stand up when I get through with you.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I've got good legs, Mr. Gallagher.
Patch Gallagher: Yes, so I've noticed; but, don't let them run away with you.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Sorry to tell ya, but I'm the kind of investment that doesn't pay.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: [reading a note from Tod] Don't say 'them things'. Don't say 'can it'. Don't say 'guy'. Don't buy shoes with ribbons on them. Don't forget, what's a striptease on 2nd Avenue is art on Broadway. The $50 is to buy you a dress without a zipper.
Steve: So, you took Warner, eh?
Patch Gallagher: Yeah, I know she's not so hot, but with all the real talent going Hollywood, you've got to make the best of what you can get.
Steve: We'll be down to using midgets pretty soon.
Patch Gallagher: Well, work on her. Use a whip if you have to, she's got to be loosened up by the time we open.
Steve: I'll offer her candy, maybe she like's candy.
Patch Gallagher: Offer her anything, but, more money.
Jasper Bradley, Sr.: You didn't really mean to walk out on me just for a few costumes.
Patch Gallagher: Rather than send beautiful girls out in those, I'd let them go on naked.
Jasper Bradley, Jr.: You know, Papa, that's a swell idea.
Jasper Bradley, Sr.: That's the same idea that got you kicked out of school!
Tod Newton: Do you like gardenias?
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I love 'em!
Tod Newton: I could take you in my yacht to Tahiti where they grow wild, millions of 'em.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Hoping I'd go wild too, huh?
Tod Newton: It might do you a world of good, Janie.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Tod, dance me towards the bedroom, will you?
Tod Newton: Hmmm...
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I want to get my coat. I'm going home.
Chorus Girl #1: How's that Barlow get to take Warner's place?
Chorus Girl #2: Didn't you ever hear of poisonality?
Judge: What's your name?
Rosette Henrietta LaRue: Rosette Henrietta LaRue! Occupation: hipswinging!
[the court erupts in laughter]
Judge: Now, Miss LaRue, just what constitutes a striptease?
Rosette Henrietta LaRue: A good constitution and a couple of zippers.
[the court erupts in laughter again]
Judge: Don't be ambiguous.
Rosette Henrietta LaRue: Oh, I won't if you won't.
[Smiles and sticks out her tougue. More courtroom laughter]
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: [to the heavy drinking Tod Newton] You sure drink a good dinner.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I'm like the guy throwing quarters in the slot machine. I keep on trying.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I'll stick to those thousand-to-one shots - sometimes they win.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Listen Paderewski, were them funny noises comin' outta you or the piano?
Marcia - the Southern Actress: And you all can tell that Mr. Gallagher, that cotton will grow black before I come to see him again, sir! Where we all come from, the gentlemen know how to speak to ladies. And you can tell him from me...
Steve: Break it up, you all go back to the Mason-Dixon line, sugar.
Patch Gallagher: Hey, look, those guys are a lot of silk hats and silk socks with nothing between. That's what all these dames fall for. Don't let it fool you. It never works out.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: But...
Patch Gallagher: Dancing is your racket, Duchess, I know it.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I'm not going to run out on you.
Patch Gallagher: Maybe I ought to speak Cuban! And it's the same in any language!
Steve: Wait a minute, the boss is all steamed up and this ain't no Turkish bath.
Patch Gallagher: I don't mix business with pleasure.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Well, it'd be a pleasure to me if you'd mind your own business.
Patch Gallagher: Yeah? Say, listen, its my business to see that you gals keep your shapes, Duchess.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: You mean to see that we don't give 'em away.
Chorus Girl: Hey! Look what Ward King says in his column. "It is rumored that one of the new girls in the forthcoming Bradley production, soon will go to the alter with a gay blade from the social registered section of Our Town." What does she do? Hypnotize 'em?
Art Jarrett: [singing] My dancing lady, There's nobody like you, You find such pleasure, In doing what you do...
Patch Gallagher: I've been in this racquet for years. If you don't get a good break, you get a bad one. That's show business.
Patch Gallagher: Listen, Steve, Bradley can't do this to me. I'm gonna carry this show myself. I'm gonna produce it! I've got some dough! And what I haven't got, I'll get! I'll hock my car, my clothes, my house, everything!
Steve: That's great. And-and-and-and I got some, I got some money I been hoarding against the next Depression. And you can have every dime of it!
Patch Gallagher: All right! Drag it out!
Patch Gallagher: Even the creditors are wise. Hangin' around like a pack of hungry wolves.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: But, don't you see, if you could show 'em a hit.
Patch Gallagher: You can't kid them. I'll be lucky if they let the curtain go up. They know a hit from a bust!
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Oh, Pat, if its gonna be a bust, let me be there when it happens.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Okay, bruiser, the first round's yours. But, I'm not licked yet!
Patch Gallagher: If you don't get a good break, you get a bad one. That's show business.
Tod Newton: Hello, Gallagher.
Patch Gallagher: Well, well, if it isn't the other half of the firm. Back from Havana so soon? Somebody close your show too?
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: You trying to be funny, Patch? Tom's not in the show business.
Patch Gallagher: Another
[orders a drink after downing a shot]
Patch Gallagher: ... Not in the show business huh?
Tod Newton: Come on away, Janie, he's just a...
Patch Gallagher: I'm a little drunk, is that what you're trying to say. Well, drunk or sober, my hat's still out to you. There are more ways than one to close a show, and you taught me a new one.
Tod Newton: That's enough...
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Hey, wait a minute.
Patch Gallagher: What's the matter? Afraid your boyfriend'll get a poke in the jaw for throwing a hundred people out of work just so he could take you on a joy ride to Cuba?
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I don't know what you're talking about,.
Patch Gallagher: No? Not much.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I'll be seeing ya.
Patch Gallagher: Oh, sure, sure. We'll sit around the fire, whittle sticks, and talk about a girl who traded Broadway for Park Avenue.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: You shouldn't have said that, Patch.
Patch Gallagher: No. No, I shouldn't have said that. And I shouldn't have said anything to you but beat it the day you came in her.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Okay, I'll take it. But remember, I stay out of your private collection.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Gee, this is a swell du... uh, place.
Patch Gallagher: That's too bad, because it's going to be changed.
Pinky - the Show's Author: You can't do that without our say-so...
Patch Gallagher: It's in my contract that I don't have to put on a turkey. What I say, goes.
Pinky - the Show's Author: Mr. Gallagher, I might say that I've been expecting something like this.
Pinky's Pal: Now, don't irritate Pinky - you know how he is.
Patch Gallagher: Sure, sure. I know how he is. I had a cousin like him once. We had to shoot him.
Rosette Henrietta LaRue: How can you pal around with me and still be so dumb?
Patch Gallagher: You got paid for rehearsing. Nobody else did. You didn't think Bradley gave you that, do you?
Tod Newton: Shut up, Gallagher.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Say, what is this?
Patch Gallagher: Ah, you don't savvy, eh?
Patch Gallagher: Well, maybe I oughtta speak Cuban. It's the same in any language. I suppose you don't know that your boyfriend here paid Bradley to close the show.
Tod Newton: You can settle that with me, Gallagher. Janie had nothing to do with it.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: Tod, did you...
Patch Gallagher: Oh, yes, Tod did, and I'd like to take Tod over to the theater right now and feed him to the boys and girls for breakfast. They need something to eat. Well, we'll show 'em tomorrow night, and on my dough.
Janie 'Duchess' Barlow: I'm through dreamin'. I'm gonna start doin'.