Judge: Order! Order!

Curly: Order? I'll take a ham sandwich!

Judge: Hold thy tongue!

Curly: Not tongue, ham!

Curly: [an imaginary horse race] They're off!

Larry: Who's in the quarter?

Curly: Whopper!

Larry: Who's in the half?

Curly: Whopper!

Larry: Who's in the stretch?

Curly: Whopper!

Larry: Who's the winner?

Curly: Rosemont!

Moe: Who's the winner?

Curly: Rosemont.

[Moe slaps him]

Larry: [as Curly heads for Faith, who is more attractive than her sister Charity] What doest thou? I saw her first!

Curly: Pish-posh and tish-tosh. I'll never give up Hope. Why does not thou take Charity?

Larry: I need not charity. I'm on the WPA.

Curly: WPA?

Larry: Aye! Willing Pilgrims Association.

Chief Rain in the Puss: Ugh! No more war. Give 5000 shekels.

Governor: But we have no more than this.

[Chief shakes a small pouchful of coins]

Chief Rain in the Puss: Mm! Good down payment. Take mortgage on balance - interest six per cent.

Pilgrim: Thank goodness! At last are we free to hunt?

Chief Rain in the Puss: No! No hunt till FOB!

Governor: FOB?

Chief Rain in the Puss: Mm. Fork over balance.

Curly: Indian givers.

Moe: Fire at will.

Curly: Which one is Will?

Judge: Ye are accused of doing battle with his Majesty's guards. What say ye to the charge?

Larry: I can explain, judge. You see-eth, it was like this-eth...

Judge: Guilty! I sentence ye to Newcape Prison for forty years! Ye to forty-five! Ye to fifty!

Moe: Forty?

Larry: Forty-five?

Curly: Fifty? I got fifty. Fifty. Fifty, fifty, fifty, fifty, do I hear fifty-five, do I hear fifty five? Going once, twice, do I hear fifty-five? Who'll make it fifty-five?

Judge: [breaks gavel] I shall!

Curly: Thank you. I... Woo!

Judge: Fifty-five years for the lot of ye at hard labor!

Prosecutor: But, your lordship, t'would cost the crown a pretty penny to feed yon wastrels for fifty-five years! Why not send them to our colonies in America to fight the redskin savage?

Curly: Mmm, I just love corned beef and savage!

Judge: Silence! I now sentence ye knaves to defend our colonists from the savages!

Moe: Gadzooks! They'll scalp us alive!

Curly: Not me! Nyuk nyuk nyuk nyuk nyuk!

Moe: [to Faith] All my life I have been looking for a maid like thee, Toots.

Governor: [after returning to his house to see his daughters and the Stooges dancing to the music box] FIE! FIE! What means this frivolity?

[the music box still plays and the governor turns to it]

Governor: QUIET!

[the music stops]

Curly: [after the Stooges drop their balls and chains on the courtroom floor with the the NBC 3-note chimes] Fifteen seconds before 11:00 A.M. Baloney Watch Time.

Moe: Shut up!

Curly: Give ME the bird!

Larry: Nay, tis mine!

[reading the scroll from His Majesty: "Giveth them the works."]

Moe: Why dost thou not lookest where thy smacketh?

Curly: [finding Moe unconscious] Hey, Moe, say a few syllables.

Moe: Why don't ye look where ye swisheth?

[a sign at the edge of town: "'Plymouth City 'Limits / Come 'Again / Plymouth Chamber of Commerce"]

[the colonists are starving from the Native American's hunting restriction]

Moe: Tis a chance to redeem ourselves, lads. We shall hunt anyway and feed the colonists.

Curly: Thou hast said a mouthful.

Moe: I shall bringeth a moose.

Larry: And I shall bringeth an elk.

Curly: I'll bring a couple o' Odd Fellows, nyak nyuk nyuk.

Prosecutor: Your Lordship, these rogues do lay claim to be kin to the three musketeers.

Larry: One for all!

Moe: All for one!

Curly: Every man for himself!

Judge: Silence, ye knaves!