- Vivian Marsden Halstead: [At door to hotel] Darling, are you gonna carry me over the threshold?
- Arthur Halstead: [Arms full of luggage] I can't baby. I've got all these other bags. C'mon.
- Arthur Halstead: [Reading bills] Valet service, cleaning and pressing, $46! What do you dames do to get your clothes so dirty? What are you, commandos?
- Stanley Slade: I'm changing my will. I've found a new way to beat the inheritance tax. I'm leaving everything to the government.
- Mr. Jordan: Of course, the honeymoon couple. I'm sure you'll like our bridal suite. Wonderful view of the Potomac. Although so few of the occupants notice.
- Stanley Slade: [Writing check] Elizabeth Brush Cartwright. How large a donation do you want, Elizabeth?
- Elizabeth Brush Cartwright: Ah, $50?
- Stanley Slade: $50.
- Elizabeth Brush Cartwright: $50 will keep my nursery babies in milk for a month.
- Stanley Slade: Get awfully mildewed won't they?
- Sgt. Natalia Moskoroff: Tonight in my village, there will be dancing in the street!
- Edna Stokes Cadman: Tonight in my village, we'll be sleeping in the street.
- Stanley Slade: I've got a floating kidney.
- Vivian Marsden Halstead: You have?
- Stanley Slade: Yes. I got it in '29 when Columbia Gas hit $7.00 a share.
- Stanley Slade: Now, important personality, Mrs. Cartwright. A woman of great influence. Always in the news.
- Nan Curtiss Dillon: Oh yeah, she had a big spread in Vogue.
- Stanley Slade: Big spread. Yes, that's her.
- Arthur Halstead: Why didn't we get married before we left New York? Why Maryland?
- Vivian Marsden Halstead: Because it's more romantic eloping like this.
- Arthur Halstead: Eloping from what? What's stopping us? You're an orphan and my family disowned me for voting Democratic!
- Vivian Marsden Halstead: You can tell we're in Washington now, Arthur. Look at all the brass hats!
- Arthur Halstead: [chuckles] Brass hats? Vivian, those are cuspidors.