Sally McGuire: Hello, glamour boy.

Jimmy Plum: Hello Sally.

Sally McGuire: What's dragging you down?

Jimmy Plum: Well, I was out with my girlfriend and her boyfriend and we bumped into his wife and she said...

Sally McGuire: Wait a minute. Say that again and say it slower.

Aunt Betsy: Yes, you can't control fate.

Jimmy Plum: No, but sometimes you can give it a little push in the right direction.

Jimmy Plum: Her mind's an open book to me. Most of the pages are blank.

Angela Rutherford: And I won't even cook, if you don't want me too.

Jimmy Plum: You see, the major and his wife are very much in love with each other. So they were divorced.

Sally McGuire: That sounds sensible.

Jimmy Plum: Yeah, but something tells me they're still in love with each other. It's a hunch.

Sally McGuire: I know - man's intuition.

Jimmy Plum: Yeah, but they're both too proud to admit it. If I could only think of some way to get 'em back together again.

Sally McGuire: Jimmy, I'm going to talk to you as woman to woman.

Jimmy Plum: You mean my slip's showing?

Sally McGuire: Now take my advice. Go and see the major's wife and tell her she's still in love with her ex-husband.

Harriet West Jarrett: When you've been burned once, you don't go out looking for fire to play with.

Angela Rutherford: What a disagreeable woman.

Jimmy Plum: From a man's point of view, she's a very glamorous woman.

Jimmy Plum: She certainly is sophisticated.

Sally McGuire: Who, Angela?

Jimmy Plum: No, the major's wife. I didn't even get to first base with her.

Sally McGuire: You mean the major's wife?

Jimmy Plum: No, Angela.

Sally McGuire: Oh, I see, heh. I was a little mixed up at first, but now I'm becoming confused.

Jimmy Plum: Are you gonna believe me, or are you gonna believe what you just saw? I, I mean, you haven't seen anything yet. I, uh, I, I mean, what am I saying?

Angela Rutherford: I don't blame you a bit for getting rid of her.

Maj. Hilary Jarret: I didn't. She got rid of me.

Jimmy Plum: Anyway, everybody in town's talking about you two.

Angela Rutherford: They are? What do they say?

Jimmy Plum: Well, there's two schools of thought. Either you're robbing the grave or he's robbing the cradle.

Angela Rutherford: A boy at 18 is still a child. A girl at 18 is a mature woman.

Sally McGuire: Oh, Jimmy all my life I've wanted a man. A man who'd make my hair stand on end; who'd send chills up and down my spine; who'd bring tears to my eyes.

Jimmy Plum: You don't want a man. You want a shampoo, a massage and a bottle of horseradish.