The Mouse on the Moon (1963)

Ron Moody: Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy

Quotes 

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Peace. prosperity, and plumbing.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Benter, you know the Constitution as well as I do. I warn you, if you don't keep that daughter of yours under control, I shall have her beheaded - or worse.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : I propose - we request a loan for research to build a rocket to send a man to the moon.

  Benter : Rocket? We can't even build fireworks.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Remember, the Americans are a strange people. Above all, they want to be loved.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Gentlemen, you are all aware that we face a grave crisis in the wine industry. If we are to lose our main source of income, then we must take new and drastic steps to save the economy and, even more, to save the vary existence of our beloved country.

  Benter : Such as?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Such as installing indoor plumbing.

  Benter : Indoor plumbing?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Precisely, indoor plumbing to - encourage the tourist trade.

  Benter : All you want is a hot bath for yourself! Does anyone really think that our country's tragic situation can be rectified by installing a few indoor privies?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Modern living demands indoor privies! Everyone wants them.

  Benter : I don't. They're not sanitary.

  Grand Duchess Gloriana XIII : Surly, this is a matter that should be discussed by the Privy Council.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : I hardly think so, Your Grace. It isn't that kind of privy council.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : The truth is I think I'm finished. You see, this week tomatoes. Next week, bombs.

• Professor Kokintz : Mountjoy, great news!

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : The Americans have replied!

  Professor Kokintz : They have?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : What did they say?

  Professor Kokintz : Yes. What?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : For what?

  Professor Kokintz : For what?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : What did they say?

  Professor Kokintz : I don't know.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : But, you said they'd replied.

  Professor Kokintz : No, you said they'd replied.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Did you or did you not say you had great news?

  Professor Kokintz : Yes.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Then we've won!

  Professor Kokintz : No, we've two!

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Two?

  Professor Kokintz : The bobolinks. In the forest.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Two what?

  Professor Kokintz : Bobolinks.

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : What the hell are bobolinks?

  Professor Kokintz : Birds! Rare little birds. Never found in Europe and I found two.

• Vincent Mountjoy : Why did they chase me? Who are they?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Young beatniks.

  Vincent Mountjoy : Beatniks? Here?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Things have changed. We live in grave times, my boy.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : The money is for modernization, plumbing, hot - steaming - baths.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : "So I ask you to back me in my efforts to put Grand Fenwick on the map. Let our watchword be: Forward with the people. The skies the limit." Get the idea? Goes equally well for rockets or plumbing.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Cynthia, listen, this boy worries me. I think he's touched. This mad desire for physical fitness, it's not healthy. Why, you're an attractive girl. Can't you interest him into more manly things? You know what I mean.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : The American taxpayer has always been deceived. It is his birthright.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : I'll announce it on television. Fireside chat to the nation. We've had that set for three years. It's about time we used it. How shall I begin? "Good evening." Brilliant!

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : My dear boy, don't you understand? That's good for every taxpayer. It takes the rivalry out of the space race, makes the world safer for it, and we get our bath tubs.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : You're always exploding things. Could you make a realistic explosion inside that Russian hot water heater?

  Professor Kokintz : That Russian what?

  Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : The rocket.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Vincent! What on earth are you doing with those chickens?

  Vincent Mountjoy : Fresh eggs on the way out and roast chicken coming home.

• Prime Minister Rupert Mountjoy : Hello! Are you there? You moonstruck monsters!