Cpl. Conrad: This new command is an illusion. Give it up.

Col. Martin Hessler: I am Martin Hessler. Four years ago, my panzers overran Poland in one week, that was no illusion. In 39 days, my tanks smashed all the way to Paris, that was no illusion. I conquered the Crimea, that was no illusion. Today, I was given a brigade of Tiger tanks. When I have a brigade of tanks, THAT is reality.

Maj. Wolenski: Where do you think you're going?

1st Cook: To the shelter.

Maj. Wolenski: No you're not. Grab your rifles and come with me.

1st Cook: But we're cooks!

Maj. Wolenski: [pauses] Lunch is over! Grab your rifles!

Col. Martin Hessler: I do not kill prisoners, but I would have no compunction at shooting you myself for your last remark.

Maj. Wolenski: Then do it!

Sgt. Guffy: It's like hitting them with tennis balls!

Louise: Guffy!

Sgt. Guffy: So long, partner.

[looks her up and down]

Sgt. Guffy: Take care of yourself.

Louise: Guffy! Don't you want to kiss me?

[long kiss]

Sgt. Guffy: Don't forget to feed the chickens.

Gen. Grey: They've made mistakes before. Where've they made one this time?

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: Well, they got me mad at them.

Gen. Kohler: [reading an incoming message] "From the American commander of Bastogne to the German commander: Nuts." Nuts?

Maj. Wolenski: You listen to me Colonel,there are survivors in all massacres. And I warn you, if any of my men are harmed, you will be held responsible. There'll be no place on this earth that you can hide, and when you're found, I hope I'm the man that ties the rope around your neck.

Sgt. Guffy: Come on I'm waiting for ya. Come on!

Sgt. Duquesne: I got a bad feeling about this.

Lt. Weaver: If you wanted to make a run for it, why didn't you?

Sgt. Duquesne: I'm in your outfit, Lieutenant. My job is to look out for you, go where you go.

Lt. Weaver: I sure got you into the wrong place this time.

Col. Martin Hessler: General, before you go, may I show you something?

Col. Martin Hessler: What is it?

Col. Martin Hessler: A chocolate cake.

Gen. Kohler: Well?

Col. Martin Hessler: It was taken from a captured American private. It's still fresh. If you will look at the wrapping, general, you will see it comes from Boston.

Gen. Kohler: And?

Col. Martin Hessler: General, do you realize what this means? It means that the Americans have fuel and planes to fly cake across the Atlantic Ocean. They have no conception of defeat.

Lt. Weaver: [speaking to U.S. Army M.P.s he knew were Germans in disguise at the fuel supply camp, in a sarcastic voice] Does the road to Amblève still lead to Malmedy?

[then he shoots them]

Sgt. Guffy: Here's your half, 320 dollars, now what'd you make?

Louise: 1,230 dollars.

Sgt. Guffy: Oh? Whatta you been sellin? I don't see much stock gone.

Louise: Take it.

Sgt. Guffy: I won't take it until I know how you made it. What do you think I am?

Louise: What do you think I am?

Col. Martin Hessler: Release the boy... Shoot the father!

Col. Martin Hessler: The Germans are still the world's *best* toy makers.

Gen. Kohler: The toys we are making these days are not for children.

Col. Martin Hessler: Our column has made the farthest advance! We have outrun the other Panzers! The eyes of Germany are on us! The Fuhrer himself will decorate me. We have done it Conrad! We have done it!

Cpl. Conrad: Then I was wrong. We have won the war.

Col. Martin Hessler: No.

Cpl. Conrad: You mean we have lost?

Col. Martin Hessler: No.

Cpl. Conrad: I don't understand. If we have not won, and we have not lost, than what is happening?

Col. Martin Hessler: The best thing possible is happening - the war will go on.

Cpl. Conrad: For how long?

Col. Martin Hessler: Indefinitely. On, and on, and on!

Cpl. Conrad: But it must come to an end.

Col. Martin Hessler: You're a fool Conrad. Those of us who understood knew in 1941 that we could never win.

Cpl. Conrad: You mean Colonel for three years we have been fighting without any hope of victory?

Col. Martin Hessler: There are many kinds of victory. For the German Army to survive, for us to remain in uniform - that is our victory. Conrad, the world is not going to get rid of us after all.

Cpl. Conrad: But, when do we go home?

Col. Martin Hessler: This is our home.

Cpl. Conrad: And my sons? When do I see them? What will become of them?

Col. Martin Hessler: They will become German soldiers, and you will be proud of them.

[pause]

Col. Martin Hessler: Conrad, do you still have any of those delicacies left you offered me at Ambleve?

Cpl. Conrad: Yes, sir.

Col. Martin Hessler: Prepare them for me. I'm in very good appetite!

[Music]

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: A lot of guys are gonna die to keep you safe and cozy.

Joe: You sure know how to hit below the belt, Colonel. That's dirty fighting.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: We're not in a pillow fight, Joe. I'm sorry it hurts.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: [Kiley is selecting men for a night patrol] I'll take that sergeant.

Maj. Wolenski: OK. But I'll pick the rest of your volunteers.

Gen. Kohler: Well, Hessler. It has been a long time. How good it is to see you again. You look the same. A little - little leaner perhaps.

Col. Martin Hessler: The Russian Front does not put meat on a man's bones, General.

Joe: If we were a hundred feet higher, I'd jump and leave you here.

Von Diepel: General Kohler says we are behind schedule. He wants to know what's holding us up.

Col. Martin Hessler: Tell the general the Americans are learning how to retreat.

Gen. Kohler: War is hard on all of us.

Col. Martin Hessler: Central heating. Crystal chandeliers. You have a nice cellar.

Gen. Kohler: Field Marshall Göring himself gave me that painting. Lovely, isn't it?

Col. Martin Hessler: I imagine he found a bargain in Paris last year.

Cpl. Conrad: The truth... is that I'm a fool. I believed in you, but all that you believe in, is the war. You have the war, you like the war. And all I have are my sons and I don't want to lose them.

Col. Martin Hessler: I am not responsible for your children.

Cpl. Conrad: You are. You would make them soldiers.

Col. Martin Hessler: Yes, and they will fight.

Cpl. Conrad: And they will die?

Col. Martin Hessler: If necessary.

Cpl. Conrad: Necessary for who? For you?

Col. Martin Hessler: You are not only a fool, you are a traitor.

Cpl. Conrad: And you are a murderer! You would murder my sons. You would murder my country. You would murder the whole world, to stay in that uniform.

Col. Martin Hessler: I did not lose a war to die in the back seat of a car.

Sgt. Guffy: Hold it hold it, pull up, we got brass on our tail, pull it forward you idiot!

[mutters under his breath to the officers]

Sgt. Guffy: Drop dead.

[then back to his driver]

Sgt. Guffy: Pull it forward you idiot!

Joe: What am I doing up here? It's like flying inside a light bulb.

Gen. Grey: Pritchard, we're gonna test that information we got from headquarters. If it's accurate, we'll run 'em outta gas.

Col. Martin Hessler: Pick up your cap! Put it on. Try to look like a soldier!

Cpl. Conrad: What good is a soldier anyhow? He wins, he loses. What's he good for anyhow?

Gen. Kohler: Sit down, Hessler. You have too little faith in the genius of the German people. A few stones have been knocked down but our country's strong, united, determined, and more productive than ever. The Allies think that their constant air raids have undermined our morale. This they shall never do.

Gen. Kohler: You are our finest panzer commander, Hessler. You will lead us to victory. Our Germany is now like an iceberg. Only a fraction of it can be seen on the surface.

Col. Martin Hessler: Conrad, I've told you before never leave the motor running. Petrol is blood!

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: Having been an inspector of police doesn't disqualify me from thinking. All cops aren't flatfoots.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: The German soldier facing us is still an undefeated enemy. He can still fight. His leaders know that. As long as he can fight, they'll attack.

Col. Pritchard: I have 10 other officers in my section. We see the same information, get the same facts as you, Kiley. All of us come up with one answer, you come up with the complete opposite. When 10 men tell you you're drunk, you'd better lie down!

Col. Martin Hessler: Boys. Too many boys.

Gen. Kohler: The first battle will turn them into men.

Col. Martin Hessler: In the old days, I lived six months with my men before going into action. I knew them, they knew me. These are strangers. Too many boys.

Gen. Kohler: They have never tasted defeat.

Col. Martin Hessler: Do they know what is expected of them?

Gen. Kohler: They are ready to *die* for you. Can you ask more?

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: Look what showed up on this one.

[shows him a reconnaissance photo]

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: I took it over the Ardennes.

Gen. Grey: Is this a Tiger tank or isn't it?

Col. Pritchard: So it appears. One tiger doesn't make a jungle, sir.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: I expect tigers in jungles. But, when I discover one in a peaceful neighborhood, I recommend all of us take a good look under our beds.

Sgt. Guffy: [referring to whom he plans to sell nylon stockings] The boys in the front. They're gonna need that in Germany. There's lots of broads there.

Elena: General Kohler did not tell me you were so handsome.

Col. Martin Hessler: What did General Kohler tell you about me?

Elena: Nothing. Whatever I want to know, I'll find out for myself. I'm very good at that.

Elena: I am told I'm an attractive woman. You are not paying much attention to me.

Col. Martin Hessler: Very little has escaped my attention.

Elena: [leans in wearing a low cut evening dress] General Kohler did tell me one thing. What he admires most about you is your reputation with the ladies.

Col. Martin Hessler: Who are you? How did you get in here?

Elena: General Kohler's signature is magic.

[to Von Diepel]

Elena: You will excuse us, Major.

Col. Martin Hessler: Before you give orders, may I ask your rank?

Elena: Courtesan, first class. Compliments of General Kohler.

Elena: Aren't you going to offer me a drink? Or, have you been at the front so long you have forgotten your manners?

Col. Pritchard: Kiley, you're crazy. Facts mean nothing to you. Evidence means nothing. The only thing you can see are your own cockeyed hunches. Well, that doesn't work in the Army. I'm recommending you for transfer to a desk in Washington. You can tell the President how to run the war.

Lt. Weaver: We haven't got a chance.

Sgt. Duquesne: Relax. Stay loose.

Lt. Weaver: You think we'll have to surrender? Well, I hear they treat American prisoners real well.

Sgt. Duquesne: In a big battle, they treat nobody real well.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: What do you think?

Maj. Wolenski: Well, sir. I'm regular Army. I don't get into beefs between colonels. But I'll tell you what some of my stir-crazy men think. They think we got a great opportunity here. We got a chance to wipe out Germany. Just wipe it clean off the map. Knock everything down, every city, every castle, all the bridges, all the roads. Everything. Don't leave two stones standing together. Just wipe the slate clean. Turn Germany into a prairie, then ship over a few buffalo and let them start from scratch. Now, what do you think of that, colonel?

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: I think your men ought to wash their socks and take a shave. It stinks in here.

Elena: What shall we talk about? Your wife, perhaps?

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: You make coffee as bad as my wife.

Sgt. Duquesne: Come on. There's a back road that leads to the motor pool. Maybe we can get us a jeep.

Lt. Weaver: How do you know?

Sgt. Duquesne: Because I studied the maps when we arrived here. Just like you should've done.

Gen. Grey: [on the phone] Hello, Cheyenne. What's that? You're under attack? In what strength? Well, what's your guess? I can't give you air reconnaissance, I'm blind.

[hangs up]

Gen. Grey: Get Apache.

Lt. Weaver: What if we run into their lines?

Sgt. Duquesne: We're still ahead of them.

Lt. Weaver: They might have advanced patrols.

Sgt. Duquesne: It's enough trouble keeping alive in this mess without you bellyaching. If you wanna surrender, go ahead. I'll make it easier alone.

Lt. Weaver: You're out of line, sergeant.

Sgt. Duquesne: *Sor-ry*, Lieutenant.

Louise: Here. You hold all the money. I gotta go back into action. You don't know what it's like in combat. You know, you get shot, somebody takes all your money. Before the plasma comes, some guy's got his hand in your pocket.

Sgt. Guffy: Guffy. Guffy. I don't want you to get killed.

Louise: Who's talking about getting killed? You take care of the money.

Louise: When a woman goes in business with a man, it means forever.

Sgt. Guffy: What's forever?

Col. Martin Hessler: We did not have time to get better acquainted; but, all of you know my reputation. My command always suffers the highest casualties. The price of victory is never cheap. In this battle, we will be as hard as our tanks. I will reach the objectives assigned to me - no matter what the cost.

Louise: I will wait for you.

Sgt. Guffy: How can you feel this way about me? I never laid a hand on you.

Louise: That's why.

Gen. Kohler: Why have you stopped?

Col. Martin Hessler: They have dug in. It's a very strong defense.

Gen. Kohler: Bypass it.

Col. Martin Hessler: I have considered that.

Gen. Kohler: There's nothing to consider.

Col. Martin Hessler: We must measure what we might gain by what we might lose.

Col. Pritchard: [to Kiley] It's very difficult for me to say this. I was wrong.

Col. Martin Hessler: We have the opportunity here to break their morale, to destroy their will to fight. That is why you must permit me to reduce Ambleve to ashes.

Gen. Kohler: You have until 0400. That is all.

Gen. Grey: Look at that fog. If it stays, we won't find them and we won't fight. If it lifts, they'll find us. And that will be the end of our men and our tanks. And I'm praying that it lifts. What does that make me, Dan?

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: A general.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: Empty fuel drums and men carrying siphon hoses add up to one thing. The Germans are low on gas. They have to forage for it. That's their weakness!

Maj. Wolenski: Colonel, there are survivors in all massacres. I warn you, if any of my men are harmed you will be held responsible. There will be no place on earth that you can hide. And when you're found, I hope I'm the man that ties the rope around your neck.

Col. Martin Hessler: Major, I have never liked threats. I do not kill prisoners. But I will have no compunction at shooting you myself for your last remark.

Maj. Wolenski: Then do it.

Joe: Where are the flying orders? I wanna see them. I wanna know what lunatic issued them.

Lt. Col. Daniel Kiley: There are no orders, Joe. I'm the lunatic.

Col. Martin Hessler: What is this food?

Cpl. Conrad: It's the best this town has to offer.

Col. Martin Hessler: I told you, tanks run on petrol and soldiers run on rations. I must eat as my men do so I know how far they can go. Take it away.

Col. Martin Hessler: Tiger to all units. Close hatches. Forward.

Col. Martin Hessler: Tiger to Panther, spread out to left. Tiger to Lion, spread out to right. We will try to encircle. Sherman damaged. We'll finish it off. Fire! It's a hit. The next, 11 o'clock, 900.

Sgt. Guffy: Butcher One, this is Butcher Three. There's a Kraut at 1 o'clock with a pennant on his antenna. This one belongs to me. He's mine. There he is. All right, kick her left, kid. Left. Now, hard right! Hard right! Stay with them! Range: 9-0-0. Up two. Fire! Good shot! We got him!