Mad Monster Party? (1967)

Phyllis Diller: The Monster's Mate

Photos 

Quotes 

• Francesca : [thinking]  I can make the doctor's secrets mine before he bestows them on that Felix Flanken. And I can use Dracula to help me.

  The Monster's Mate : Baby, Francesca is up to something with that Dracula. They both bear watching. Besides, it's her own fault for thinking so loud.

• The Monster's Mate : Stop behaving like the Statue of Liberty. Put down that torch.

  Dracula : Yes, we can still make a deal.

  Francesca : Make a deal with you? Not so long as I have wolfsbane for you, vampire, and a torch for you, Monster. Or is it torch for a vampire and wolfsbane for a monster? Wolfsbane for a werewolf, and a torch for a vampire. No, it's stake through the heart for a vampire and a silver bullet for a monster.

  Dracula : I'll take the torch and you get the wolfsbane.

• The Monster's Mate : Remember what happened the last time you had a roving eye? I kept it in a jar for a week. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

• The Monster's Mate : [about the Mummy]  I don't know how he got his invitation. He has an unlisted tomb. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

  The Monster's Mate : [about the Hunchback of Notre Dame]  Didn't I see him at the Transylvania Gardens in the main event?

  Dracula : The Hunchback of Notre Dame ain't a boxer.

  The Monster's Mate : Afraid it'll ruin his looks, eh? Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

• Baron von Frankenstein : Ah, my dear, you look so... er, ghastly.

  The Monster's Mate : [flattered]  Oh, Doctor.

  Francesca : Oh, brother.