- Paula Schultz: Did he hurt you?
- Bill Mason: No, I always take a punch in the nose right after dinner.
- Herbert Sweeney: [Paula has passed out in the Sweeney's bed] Make her move over there.
- Bill Mason: Why?
- Herbert Sweeney: Because she's on Barbara's side, that's why!
- Herbert Sweeney: You're in this too.
- Bill Mason: [upset] I'm in it? Selling girls?
- Bill Mason: How'd you like to sell Barbara?
- Herbert Sweeney: [thinks for a moment] They wouldn't take her.
- Herbert Sweeney: Now honey, this, this poor girl happens to be - Paula - happens to be a defector. And, eh, as a CIA agent, it's one of my secret duties to, eh, offer her asylum.
- Barbara Sweeney: And as your wife it is my duty to commit you to one.
- Weber: But... if they are smart, they might figure us not to be stupid, Therefore, it would be smart to be stupid.
- Klaus: That is the most stupid thing I ever heard of.
- Weber: But, on the other hand, if they are clever, maybe we won't be clever. So it would be not clever...
- Klaus: Ah, shut up! If you wanna go to Mason's room and look around, go, stupid.
- Barbara Sweeney: Your friend... your buddy... getting us mixed up in a mess like this. I'll kill him! I'll kill him!
- Herbert Sweeney: He's my friend, I'll kill him!
- Klaus: Where is she?
- Bill Mason: Barbara, don't open your mouth.
- Herbert Sweeney: That's an imposibility.
- Barbara Sweeney: [sarcastic] Oh, my hero.
- Paula Schultz: Oh, go away. Do you wanna get shot?
- Bill Mason: All right, so I'll be a bullet ridden husband.
- Paula Schultz: Maybe a few holes will let your dishonesty leak out.