29 August 2017 | Coventry
More pleasures, please!
I was thrilled when I unexpectedly found a DVD-copy of "House of 1.000 Pleasures". These typical Italian sex-comedies of the seventies are reasonably hard to come by (at least, harder than Italian horror or crime films from the same era) and this title in particular sounded like a genuine highlight. Something that is called "House of 1,000 Pleasures" AND is directed by Antonio Margheriti AND stars two of the most ravishing contemporary Italian wenches in guaranteed topless roles simply must be a pure gem, right? Well, not necessarily. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't slightly disappointed by the story, quality of the individual tales, the number of genuinely funny sequences and – most of all – the nudity and soft-core sex footage. This is a so-called portmanteau film. In the wraparound story, a ridiculously wealthy and eccentric Arabian Sultan has a big problem. On the first night after his wedding with a beautiful wife, he
can't get it up! Acclaimed poets, writers and story-tellers are hastily summoned to the palace in order to narrate erotic tales to this Sultan and his wife. If the tale manages to excite him, the narrator will receive a giant reward, and if not, they lose their heads! The first tale is a sort of variation on "Snow White", with a sleazy emperor asking his magic mirror every morning who's the most viral stud of the country. He's used to hearing that he still proudly wears that title, until one morning the mirror claims there's a new stallion in town. The emperor invites his rival to the palace for a seduction contest. The first tale is rather tedious, forgettable and not at all funny. The second tale is slightly better, but still not living up to my expectations. This one is more of a re-imagining of the "Aladdin" story, complete with genies and magic flying carpets. It's overall boring, but at least this segment features a handful of admirable special effects. The third and last tale is finally an entertaining one, albeit still very predictable. It tells about a young nymphomaniac princess who demands that her future husband is able to make love to her 13 times (!) between the hour of midnight and dawn. Many potent young studs already took up the challenge, but no one succeeded and now they lay in the graveyard with their heads separated from the bodies. A brave and handsome young man is set to give it another try, with lots of energy in his pants, and a few clever tricks up his sleeve. Anyone can guess the twist-ending on this one, but at least the story is well- developed, funny and benefices from the best acting performances of the entire film.