Tiffany Jones (1973) User Reviews (9)

The Pete Walker Film Anouska Hempel Tried To Hide.

[morrison-dylan-fan · 6/10 · 27 November 2011]

Since seeing clips of the BFI Flipside release Man Of Violence,I have been keeping a look out on finding some of the other "lost" films of re- acclaimed British director Pete Walker.

Recently,I was surprised,when I suddenly stumbled upon a DVD of Pete Walker's adaptation of a Daily Mail comic strip,which due to having a fun saucy cover,really started to make me look forward in viewing this oddly forgotten British Comedy.

The plot:

In the Easton Europe city of Zirdana,a small group of revolutionary's break into the mansion of the ruling military general (whose currently on a plane for his first ever visit to the UK),and get hold of all the information that he has been stopping anyone else from seeing.As one of the gang goes through a pile of papers,he finds in amongst the arms contract details a picture of a model (Tiffany Jones)who they all instantly suspect of being a spy.On his landing in the UK,the military general demands to finally meet the model whose picture he has been staring at for the last three years.

This leads to Tiffany getting a very surprising call,to tell her that she must meet the dictator of Zirdana!.After having had a very eventful "first date" with the dictator, (who spent the whole time slobbering all over her)Jones gets caught up in the political turmoil of Zirdana,when the UK members of the revolutionary group kidnap Tiffany for questioning,and later on,she runs into the well meaning prince of Zirdana,who got ousted from the country via the military coup.This leads Jones to deciding,that since the ruling of Zirdana is in such a big mess,she is going to have to do everything herself,to get the prince back to his country and bring Zirdana back to its former glory.

View on the film:

Checking online for any information about this really fun film,I was sad to discover that Anouska Hempel (now Lady Weinberg) ,who gives Tiffany Jones just the right mix of intelligence and nativity has brought the copyright of the film in an attempt to stop it from ever seeing the light of day again.

Although Anouska does have quite a few scenes where her full beauty is shown,the very good script by Alfred Shaughnessy (who would later become one of the main writers for the highly praised TV drama series Upstairs Downstairs)actually avoids most of the easy trappings for these types of comedies,with Jones being shown as the only person in the film who can improvise and carry out a plan successfully.

For his solid directing, Pete Walker finds a good balance for the movie,with the film having a good side of sleaze and a surprisingly "light" feeling,with none of the sickening bulling feel of Mary Millington's disappointing films being anywhere in sight,thanks to Walker turning spy conventions on their head in funny ways, (such as a chief threatening to hurt Jones with some mildly warm soup)and making even the more "loose" moments in the second half of the movie (an over- extended final chase scene) move at a enjoyably pleasant pace.

Final view on the film:

A very good-natured comedy,whose fun moments do not deserve to be forced into obscurity.

Good fun for Walker fans

[Groverdox · 7/10 · 3 March 2019]

"Tiffany Jones" was a return to straight sexploitation for Pete Walker, who spent most of the seventies making the horror b-movies he is best known for.

Tiffany Jones is apparently a comic strip character. The opening credits feature shots of the comic strip - and an awful theme song.

"Zirdana - Eastern Europe" says the title. This... country (?) is apparently a dictatorship. The president of Zirdana arrives in England, according to a news report Tiffany Jones watches, while wearing a skimpy towel.

She's a model.

The movie provides some nudity at about the fifteen minute mark, with Tiffany in the bathtub.

She is tasked with doing an ad for Zirdana's tourism.

She is made to stand topless in front of Zirdana's evil president.

The president falls in love with Tiffany.

She is a surprisingly plucky, intelligent character, who is able to fend off his advances with her mind.

She is also effortlessly sexy, and doesn't mind appearing in a state of undress.

Tiffany is summoned to a photographer's studio, and the actor who plays the photographer is someone I recognize from other movies, though I'm not sure which ones. Is he one of the Hammer actors?

The photographer takes Tiffany's photo, but really he just wants to interrogate her about her work with the president. He's "Zirdanian" and wants to kill the dictator.

The photographer is actually a member of Zirdana's deposed monarchy.

Tiffany Jones provides not one, but two bathtub scenes.

In another scene, Tiffany is strapped to a gurney by a group of terrorist chefs. She is in her lingerie, until one of the chefs cut her bra off, while discussing different culinary methods of torture.

The beautiful Tiffany displays her talents again when she is able to convince a chef to swap places with her, and claim she has run off.

Tiffany then joins forces with the chefs, to help them overthrow the President.

While sneaking around, Tiffany encounters two middle aged American diplomat types, who apparently don't mind sharing a room, or appearing naked in front of each other. Luckily, Walker has the intelligence to know we don't want to see nudity from these senior citizens, and doesn't show any. Tiffany does give us a shower scene, though.

There follows a delightful scene in which the President eats lunch outdoors with many beautiful models, all of whom disrobe.

The "conclusion", or at least the final scenes, become pretty muddled. I guess Walker tried to tie up the nonsensical plot, but I admit I stopped paying attention for the first time during the last bits.

But, you know what? I still recommend "Tales of Tiffany Jones". It is exactly what we love Pete Walker for: he knew he wasn't making great art, or even legitimately good movies. He was just trying to have fun. And he invited the viewer to join him.

Neither One Thing Nor The Other

[david-879 · 4/10 · 12 April 2006]

The original Tiffany Jones newspaper strip won plaudits for its wit and style. Written and drawn by two female fashion journalists, it told of the exploits of a glamorous model, Tiffany, and her friends Jo and boyfriend Guy, and epitomised the free spirit of 'Swinging London'. Unfortunately this seems to have been completely jettisoned in this rather tedious adaptation. Instead poor Jo and Guy are relegated to a brief appearance at the start of the film, and then disappear for the duration. Tiffany gets embroiled in an attempt by a deposed foreign royal to overthrow the dictatorship which has taken over his country. The makers of the film seem unsure how seriously they should take the story, and how much sex and nudity (which is after all the only reason most people will be watching) to throw into the mix. One can only speculate what Fiona Richmond's producers, makers of probably the best looking sex films of the period, would have done with this story. Or how it would have been handled by the more low-brow creators of the 'Confessions' or 'Adventures' films; doubtless the clothing would have been lost with more panache than happens here. Anouska Hempel does not have the knowing sexuality of a Fiona, nor does she have the dizzy wide-eyed innocence which might also have worked. Instead she is reduced to reacting to everything that happens to her as if it was an everyday occurrence. The viewer is left with a feeling of regret for what might have been.

Nothing (script, acting, etc.) in this film rises beyond 4 stars

[Musicianmagic · 3/10 · 15 October 2018]

The producers must have given up on this film before production even started. Very weak script, while based on a comic strip, the comic had better dialogue. Plot is simple but also juvenile. The acting extremely mediocre as if no one cared. Much of the sets, props & costumes are sparse or weak. Cinematography slightly above amateur. Music, very dated though nothing memorable even when made. So what is left? Bare bodies. You see the lead actress in states of undress a number of times, often as a running gag thru the movie, though no laughs by me. One extended scene has a number of girls getting undressed (some full frontal) but the camera jumps around so much, doubt anyone gets excited from it. I originally gave 4 stars but as I wrote the above review, changed it to only 3 stars. It really is an awful movie. An hour in I just wanted it to end. I recommend you save your time and watch any other movie.

Comic Book Catastrophe - Below Average Comedy

[ninjaalexs · 4/10 · 28 October 2021]

Anouska Hempel bought the rights to this film to stop it being released. A lot of actresses change careers, but acknowledge the fans that put them were they are today. Sam Fox doesn't get them out any more, but she still appreciates stripping off and being a huge personality put her on the map. Luckily a VHS release on the Jezebel (which put-out cult sexploitation films) imprint of Salvation Films was released in the late 90s.

The film is based off a British comic strip, about a sort of female spy with St Trinians-esque capers. The film is absolute rubbish. Sure, most of these British sex films weren't funny or sexy, but at least most like Confessions Of A Window Cleaner weren't boring. There is very little nudity or sex in this film despite an overly-zealous BBFC 18 rating and very little action. I've heard the similar film The Big Zapper is better, but I've not seen it. To me it seemed like the budget was too small or Pete Walker had his hands tied in some way, maybe the budget or the source material.

I watched this as Pete Walker completest and as a fan of crappy British cult films. The version I saw was a rip of aforementioned VHS tape. I can't recommend this to anyone as a film experience apart from for its scarcity and cult status.

Not Walker's usual fare

[Leofwine_draca · 4/10 · 24 November 2022]

This atypical Pete Walker romp is a far cry from the horror fare he would later put out - and much worse in quality, too. Based on a long-forgotten comic strip, it features THE SCARS OF DRACULA's Anouska Hempel as the titular character, who finds herself getting intimate with the tyrannical ruler of a made-up country. Somehow, somewhere this seems to have been devised as a gender-swap Bond spoof, but something's lost along the way. Instead we get grating comedy, endless nudity from Hempel, an excruciating nude bathing sequence that goes on forever, and a cast of famous faces (including poor old Eric Pohlmann) deserving better.

Spy comic

[BandSAboutMovies · 3/10 · 25 April 2020]

Pete Walker (Die Screaming, Marianne; Frightmare; House of the Long Shadows) directed this movie, which is based on the comic strip by Pat Tourret and Jenny Butterworth. It fits nicely into both the comic book and spy genres.

Anouska Hempel was one of the Angels of Death in On Her Majesty's Secret Service, plus she had roles in Scars of Dracula and Black Snake before becoming an interior designer and a member of British society.

Here, she plays Tiffany Jones, a model by day and secret agent by night. This movie lives up to the tagline, "Presidents want her, Revolutionaries seek her, And that's why she's always taking off!"

Perhaps that's why Hempel bought the UK rights to the film, preventing any future DVD releases or TV showings. I'm sure she's very unhappy that it's on Amazon Prime now.

It's not great, but it is a time capsule of London in 1973 in a way that the Austin Powers films can only hope to create.

Unwatchable

[PurpleProseOfCairo · 1/10 · 26 December 2023]

I didn't get far into this before, realising how bad it was, then skimmed through the rest of it to have that initial impression confirmed. It really is a cheap, nasty, offensive piece of junk. The one positive is the beauty of Miss Hempel, but neither her acting, the script, nor the people surrounding her can raise this above the level of disaster.

You may recall this kind of muck that was prevalent in the 70s - Mary Millington, Fiona Fullerton, etc. This is a prime example. The attempts at humour are sub-infantile, the nudity is unimpressive (imagine the desultory naked women from a 60s movie, like Woodstock, for example) and everything about it is simply an insult to the intelligence. I'm not surprised Miss Hempel tried to wipe it from history.

I just wish she had been successful.

Great Piece of '70's Kitsch

[hello-50209 · 10/10 · 6 April 2024]

Fab '70's B movie starring Anouska Hempel who appears to have some trouble keeping her clothes on! Based on a Daily Mail comic strip. Of course, the storyline is silly, Hempel tries to help the denim clad prince of the fictional state of Zidana regain his murdered father's crown, and while is doesn't entertain in the same way that the Confessions films do, (there's no Robin Askwith), it's a magnificent period piece for those interested in the fashions and designs of the time.

Check out the purple wallpaper, platform shoes, double denim, phallic orange candle, Hempel's Hendrix style military jacket etc. The acting is passable, particularly Eric Pohlmann who plays President Jabal. The film is choc full of period character actors. Lynda Barron, John Clive, Sam Kelly, 'Allo "Allo's Richard Marner, Ray Brooks as a photographer, and even the lovable Geoffrey Hughes as a Zidanan chef/President impersonator.

There's cross-dressing, a camp photographer's assistant and even a cameo by 'Diddy' David Hamilton. If you're looking for something cerebral, then obviously go elsewhere, but if you don't mind a slab of period seventies fluff then and like looking back at the fashions of the day then you'll enjoy it.