"Mitchell"...oh boy, that was weird to watch. In a bizarre way it fulfilled all my expectations as being a bad film. I was searching for something like that after a successful stream of good projects coming my way, not to mention I was curious in seeing the great character actor Joe Don Baker as a leading man. But the reality of "Mitchell" was far beyond any possible expectation; the outcome seen was a manageable disaster that didn't claim lives but managed to destroy a few brain cells on the way. It's so bad that it's good (for brief moments) and it gets a few laughs from the audience even though this isn't a comedy...but it's extremely hard to take it seriously. For the most part, it's just a troubled and boring wreck, and thanks to MST3K which made this a cult hilarious flick that we can enjoy some of its lousiness.
Baker plays the title role, a reckless and sleazy detective obsessed with two on-going investigations: one which revolves heroin dealers and other about a rich guy (John Saxon) who killed a burglar in his house. Obvious even to the clueless viewers that apparently those two actions are connected in some way. Mitchell tries to act like Dirty Harry (there's even a similar sequence when he shoots a running suspect on his knee) but doesn't have the same bite. He's too weak for it. He's drunk, clumsy and falls for the slightest possible weakness and that is when a prostitute is thrown on his lap, paid by the people he's investigating - which delivers the funniest scene of the film, a sex scene with an idiotic and funny theme song about his character. As I write this, that song still echoes in my head (My, my, my Mitchell...).
Trying to establish why "Mitchell" fails in so many levels is a difficult task and one that wouldn't fit in the limited lines we're allowed in here. It's just too much. While the few action sequences are actually interesting to watch (problem is that they always revolves around car chases, except the opening with the burglar), the rest of the film, the investigations, lame sex scenes that doesn't add anything to the film and the cringing dialogue with the kid on the street...they just don't work. And don't get me started with the dialogues between Mitchell and Martin Balsam character (whom is there to help the detective with his heroin case), which dragged on and on. I wasn't amused nor thrilled, just waiting for the "climatic" ending because the ridicule was going for far too long. No wonder that the writer only developed TV scripts after this wreck, making of this film his only theatrical screenplay.
What amazes the most in "Mitchell" is that the acting isn't all that bad as the writing. Sure, the cast was forced to deliver some of the weirdest lines of all in their whole careers, execute actions and thoughts in one of the worst projects of all time, but I think their acting isn't so atrocious as expected. Baker was in fact a good lead, in some ways I liked the character and for a brief moment when this thing wasn't so cheesy, it could actually render him a nice film series. He has charisma, some humor, plays a hard character that has some vulnerabilities but at the end of the day manages to do his job despite some unorthodox methods and his sloppy ways of acting - I've never seen a "hero" running away from trouble so many times like he does. Balsam, Saxon and others weren't so bad either. The problem stays with the script, which offers us poor dialogues, strange and unworthy of attention sequences, a waste of our time. But whatever, the damage wasn't so terrible because I've seen a lot worse and MST3K's observation of this "film" was so great that for a moment we can all say that celluloid wasn't so wasted after all. Their watching and comments on it are some of the most amusing, hilarious and relevant moments in the entertainment. It speaks volumes on this film and a lot more humored and better than most film criticisms I've ever seen ("Mittens?!?" Joe Don Baker is "Mittens"; Ooh, it's "Mitchell", the Martha Mitchell story. Joe Don Baker IS "Martha Mitchell"), not to mention the loads of references they throw on it from Johnny Mathis, "Fame" to Pink Floyd. Their version (slightly censored though) deserves a higher praise; the original "Mitchell" alone gets some note with me. It wasn't that bad though it made me feel ill for some time. And yes, this movie makes "Driving Miss Daisy" looks like "Bullitt". 3/10