The Likely Lads (1976)

Rodney Bewes: Bob Ferris

Quotes 

• Bob : Did Thelma call?

  Terry Collier : No.

  Bob : Are you sure?

  Terry Collier : We don't have a phone.

• Bob : When it comes to women you're hardly Omar Sharif.

  Terry Collier : If Omar Sharif lived in Gateshead I doubt he'd be Omar Sharif.

• Bob : In the chocolate box of life the top layer's already gone. And someone's pinched the orange creme from the bottom.

  Terry Collier : Bloody hell.

• Bob : I think I'm going through what psychiatrists call an identity crisis.

  Thelma : Is that what Alan Pooley had?

  Bob : I think Alan just liked dressing up in women's clothes.

• Bob : I'm going through a very depressed state recently, I think we should talk it through.

  Thelma : Oh Bob, we've got so much to get done, can't we talk about if later over a cup of tea, it'll keep won't it.

  Bob : Of course, its not important Thelma, I'm only questioning the validity of my entire life.

• Terry Collier : Back in time for a drink, watch the box this afternoon - that's what a weekend should be - sport, sleep, slippers and sex.

  Bob : Not necessarily in that order.

• Terry Collier : That's just one of life's bitter ironies Bob.

  Bob : I suffer a lot from those.

• Thelma : She must have quite a hold on Terry.

  Bob : Probably at this very moment.

  Thelma : Maybe we should invite Chris and Terry to badminton club.

• Thelma : I know the city is a bit grey but outside we're surrounded by breathtaking grandeur, aren't we Bob?

  Bob : Oh yes, breathtaking.

• Bob : These streets are ugly, but they have a kind of beauty.

  Terry Collier : Working class sentiment is the indulgence of working peopled created through football and rock-and-roll or people like you who moved out to the elm lodge housing estate at the earliest opportunity.

  Bob : Well I didn't want my kids growing up in these streets.

• Bob : Nobody cares, nobody's moved by the occasion.

  Terry Collier : Residents are, moved to a highrise.

• Bob : Of course you always had an irresistible sexual magnetism.

  Terry Collier : True but its not just that.

  Bob : What is it then, I'm dying to know!

  Terry Collier : Well once I've got them up here, there's no way they're going to risk leavin this dodgy area after dark.

• Terry Collier : You kicked it up there!

  Bob : Not on purpose, was only making a strong clearance.

• Fireman : We've got better things to do with taxpayers money.

  Bob : I'm sorry, when I get to the top I just lost me nerve.

  Terry Collier : Keeps your hand in doesn't it, better than polishing your bell up all afternoon.

• Bob : Mind you my wife isn't really with me.

  Terry Collier : In town though.

  Bob : Out of sight, out of mind.

  Terry Collier : Good thinking Bob.

• Christina : You are so tired, I put you up.

  Bob : You've put up with me long enough.

  Christina : I not mean with, I up-put you.

• Bob : I don't want to put you out.

  Christina : I not put out, you are nice person, you come to bed and I put you up.