2 August 2015 | Michael_Elliott
You'd Be Better Off Taking a Meatcleaver to Your Own Face
Meatcleaver Massacre (1977)
1/2 (out of 4)
Four students break into the home of their professor with the plan on scaring him but one of them decides to take it a bit further. The professor ends up paralyzed and unable to speak but even worse is that his family were brutally murdered. Soon the four students begin to suffer strange deaths and it turns out the professor is communication with an occult through brain waves.
Also known as Hollywood MEATCLEAVER MASSACRE, this film is best remembered for "starring" Christopher Lee. Apparently Lee provided on screen narration for another film that never materialized so the producer sold the footage to these filmmaker who added it to the beginning and end of this picture. I guess you can understand Lee being upset over this but at the same time you have to wonder why he didn't ask to re-write the dialogue but what he has to speak is quite laughable and it really reminded me of the speech Bela Lugosi had to give in GLEN OR GLENDA? If you're going into this movie for Lee then be warned that he only has two brief scenes.
The rest of the movie is pretty bad as it's clear no one had any movie experience and were just trying to make a cheap horror movie that could hopefully get into theaters and make money. I'm not sure if they succeeded in making money but there's no question that they made a very bad movie on many levels. For starters, the film was shot without much light so the majority of the scenes are extremely dark and to the point where you can't see what's happening. The screenplay really doesn't contain any logic as it's never quite clear why the students would kill the professor and what they do in the aftermath is quite dumb as well.
The film contains some pretty bad performances throughout and if you're just hoping for cheap exploitation due to the title then you'll be disappointed as well. The murder sequences are rather bland and there's certainly not enough gore here to make it worth sitting through. There's really not too many good things that can be said about this picture but I am thankful that it only ran 79-minutes.