Piranha

Scientists developed a variety of piranha which can live in fresh and salt water. Then the government project closed down, and they poisoned the water. But the fish survived, and eat Keenan Wynn.

It's a dumb-sounding idea for a film, one of the many movies that came out after the success of JAWS. Surprisingly, it's a funny spoof of the movie, from the posters based on the mega-hit's poster, to director Joe Dante having two-legged reptiles running around, to a silly pastiche of the beach scene. Writer John Sayles was so disgusted that he thought about giving up on film, returning to novels Instead, he took his earnings and made RETURN OF THE SECAUCUS SEVEN, and Steven Spielberg thought it was so funny, you talked Universal out of a lawsuit and hired Dante.

RELEASED IN 1978 and directed by Joe Dante, "Piranha" chronicles events when genetically-enhanced piranha are accidently released into a river system in central Texas, which threaten kids & counselors at a Summer Camp and vacationers at a lake resort. A spirited skip tracer (Heather Menzies) and a backwoods drunkard (Bradford Dillman) team-up to save the swimmers. Kevin McCarthy and Barbara Steele play military scientists who experimented with the escaped piranha.

While "Piranha" is sort of a "Jaws" (1975) knockoff, it's different enough to not be a rip-off: The story takes place in a river system deep in the mainland and not the ocean; the 'monster' consists of teams of little vicious fish rather than a huge Great White Shark; the beach sequences involve quaint campground-like beaches rather than major ocean beaches; unlike "Jaws," there's a focus on alluring young women, although "Jaws 2" (1978) delivered the goods in this area as well; there's more of a sense of adventure and even suspense; and the tone mixes-in amusing elements with the horrific mayhem.

As inferred, the picture is highlighted by several quality females with curvy Belinda Balaski (from "The Howling") and cutie Melody Thomas Scott (from The Young and the Restless) featured in prominent roles. Moreover, voluptuous Janie Squire has some worthy screen time in the prologue. There are superb women in the periphery as well. Interestingly, the 2010 quasi-remake, "Piranha 3D," took the sleaze route with loads of nudity, but the women are ironically hotter here, not to mention the film's all-around more entertaining.

THE MOVIE IS LEAN and filler-free at 93 minutes and was shot along a river near San Marcos in the heart of Texas, Northeast of San Antonio. WRITERS: John Sayles and Richard Robinson.

GRADE: A-

The ultimate underwater horror movie. Well at first Piranha does seem to live up to other horror films but it does have various goofy and campy moments. The beginning is quite fine whilst the film does show a bit of nudity. However, during the middle of the film viewers will be on the edge of their seats, wanting to find out how these small killer fish might cause relentless horror and unspeakable doom. Given its popularity and its mediocre writing I'd rather be not wanting to watch its sequels rather than only watching this movie. In the end, while the movie may be an edge of your seat roller coaster ride, it may also have its ups and its downs.

In the wake of "Jaws" came countless man vs. nature flicks with everything from bees to grizzly bears to frogs coming out to get man back for his crimes against the ecology (and don't forget "Night of the Lepus" in which huge bunny rabbits munched on hapless victims!) This film is considered one of the best imitators, primarily because of its tongue-in-cheek approach and it's deliberately campy writing and casting. Menzies is a hotshot missing persons expert who goes in search of two young hikers who have disappeared. She enlists the aid of hermit-like Dillman who lives near an abandoned government testing facility where the hikers were last suspected to have been. When they come upon a murky tank and believe the bodies could be at the bottom, Menzies releases the contents, unwittingly unleashing a school of vicious, genetically-altered piranha onto an unsuspecting river full of camp kids and park revelers. From there, it's a race against the clock to get to Dillman's young daughter who is about to enter a camp relay race in the water downstream. The film is deliberately peppered with actors who've made their mark in either horror or suspense films and it makes no pretenses about its lack of originality (though it does manage to come up with some despite itself!) Dillman (sporting an atrocious come-and-go Southern accent) and Menzies have a surprisingly decent rapport with each other with a few amusing scenes tossed in amongst all the panic. McCarthy pops up as a terrified scientist who knows his plans have gone awry. Wynn has a cameo as a gruff, but likable neighbor of Dillman's. Steele plays an ominous scientist in cahoots with Army colonel Gordon to keep the whole situation under wraps. Bartel is the persnickety camp counselor and Miller is the smarmy amusement park owner, both of whom disbelieve that there's any danger. Despite it's minuscule budget and rather homemade effects, the film does generate a bit of eye-opening gore and more than a little discomfort as these tiny fish nibble away at anything in the water. If "Jaws" caused people to avoid the ocean, this film could make people think twice about cloudy rivers and lakes! The murkiness of the water only adds to the horror of it all as the bikini-clad tourists and innertube-wielding kids can't begin to see what's coming. It's just a sting, then a nibble, then blood everywhere! Some of the effects are tacky and amusing, but there's a certain level of true fear as well. If one likes this genre to begin with, it will probably be a pleasure to watch. Others may be less enthralled.

The 1978 Roger Corman produced picture Piranha was about…well, piranha. Killer fish escape a government research lab and kill hapless vacationers, fishermen, and scientists. The film could have been real hokey if not for writer John Sayles and director Joe Dante. The two of them would become very successful in Hollywood with the release of The Howling. The cast is full of familiar faces such as Kevin McCarthy, Paul Bartel, Dante regulars Robert Picardo and Dick Miller, and Barbra Steele. The effects are cheesy but that's part of the fun. I believe that they made the best movie about menacing fish that they could. It has just the right mix of comedy and terror and it's entertaining. The Jaws video game was a nice touch too.

"They're eating the guests, sir."