27 April 1999 | dvox
"Charlie's Angels" on horseback sidesaddles itself in silliness!
Saddlesore saga concerning cowflop capers concocted by crew of curvy "con" cowgirls out to clear themselves by crushing a career-killer stalking the president of the United States (this one-trick-pony "Charlie's Angels-on-horseback" clone even corrals actor David Doyle as president!). Cowboy cameos by veteran character actors Doug McClure and Vic Morrow cannot lasso this lengthy lonesome trail loser from a literary lynching! Add actress Jessica Walter and actor Paul Burke to the rioutous roundup and you have "The Love Boat" dry-docked some- where between Denver and Durango! In fact, the bronc-busting "best" performance portrayed in this petticoat ponygirls pablum is by a young Geraldo Rivera-lookalike, who, as "The Colonel" (no lines and no billing in the cast credits) is felled by "Sean" (such a sinister name), "Europe's most deadly assassin"! The foppish, swaggering Sean, strolls down the stairs, cordially greets "The Colonel" (the most consistent character in that he just stands inert, as a silent, passive plot foil). "Wild and Wooly" is weak and wimpy. Rumor has it the director had to get out of Hollywood by sundown! I give this tumbleweed travesty 0 stars, but 4 cow-pies!