Hunter: Works for me!

Hunter: Ya need a date?

Dee Dee: Yeah. You got somebody in mind who doesn't look like a cop?

Hunter: Uh, wait a minute now. You look more like a cop than I do.

Dee Dee: Hunter, if you looked any more like a cop, they'd give you a TV series where you got to play one!

Dee Dee: Boy, this really fries my eggs!

Hunter: Ya know, this time last year, I got 25 fruit baskets. If I get one more fruit basket, I'm having a sex change operation!

Lloyd Fredericks: It was a setup, and I want a polygraph!

Sergeant Brad Navarro: You shut your mouth, or you're gonna need Poly-GRIP!

Curguyan Consulate General: I must confess. I am totally addicted to your detective shows on television.

Ben: All these years, I wondered who you were, what you were like. I wondered if I was anything like you. I just wanted to know who my father was.

Hunter: Well, now you know. You should also know that you've had a father for the past 17 years. A good man. A man that's loved you, raised you, given you a good home, worried about you. I think that's a pretty good definition of fatherhood.

Dee Dee: This guy is so intelligent, he's having his mail forwarded.

Hunter: Oh, I love smart crooks!

Hunter: Can you imagine what it's like to sit there for two days and answer personal questions about your sex life?

Dee Dee: Yeah, it's like that every time I go to visit my mother.

Dee Dee: So, what did the psychiatrist say? Can Ricky go out and play, or are all his groceries in the same bag?

Dee Dee: Did you hear that gunshot?

Hunter: That wasn't a gunshot. It was a branch that had fallen off of a tree due to the insurmountable weight of the snow that landed upon it.

[Flashing his badge]

Hunter: I've got 16 years behind that badge, Drasso. And if it wasn't for that, I'd pound your head square. Now, you know where I live and you know when I get off. So if you want a piece of me, come on. If you don't, shove off!

Woman: I was expecting a shabby little man in a raincoat.

Hunter: You've got the wrong television show.

Hunter: Captain? Do you know how many officers have been killed because they were too busy firing warning shots?

Dr. Bolin: You truly are a trobuled person.

Hunter: Well, you should be the expert on mental disorders, being as screwed up as you are!

Carlos: [Engine reving up] Hey Hunter. Those aren't the car keys for that car.

Hunter: Yeah I know but McCall could hotwire a broom handle if she had to. See ya.

Carlos: Hey wait. Hunter come back here. HUNTER!

Hunter: I know your father married your mother when you and she had nothing. He brought you to this country, gave you a good home, loved you... and when you got in trouble he called mel.

Ben: Yeah... yeah... why you? Why not some other cop?

Hunter: Because he knew I was the only one that would help you.

Ben: But he told me he never met you before.

Hunter: He was telling you the truth, Ben. He'd never met me before... but your mother had. I'm your father, Ben.