Allie Lowell: I can't alter my feelings to suit your lifestyle.

Bob Barsky: Why not? You want me to alter my lifestyle to suit your feelings.

Allie Lowell: Only if they're your feelings too.

Kate McArdle: Let me tell you something about your father, Emma. He may not always be there for you like some fathers are. But when he is, it's parades and skyrockets. Cherish every moment because he's one of a kind and he loves you so much.

Jennie Lowell: [Allie and Jennie are concluding a talk about sex] What you're saying is that I should wait.

Allie Lowell: Definitely, yes.

Jennie Lowell: But that the choice is mine.

Allie Lowell: Unfortunately, yes.

Allie Lowell: [after joke has been successfully pulled] And people say I'm not the fun one.