Charley Partanna: [annoyed] Marxie Heller so fuckin' smart, how come he's so fuckin' dead?

Irene Walker: I can't get over it. What kinda creep wouldn't catch a baby? If it was real it coulda been crippled for life.

Charley Partanna: He wasn't paid to bodyguard the baby.

Irene Walker: Charley, I've been doin' three to four hits a year for the past couple of years, most at full pay.

Charley Partanna: That many?

Irene Walker: Well, it's not many when you consider the size of the population.

[Charlie is telling Maerose about Irene]

Charley Partanna: I met her in a church. It just happened. I knew she was the woman for me. She'd organized the scam in Vegas. I go looking for the bad guy and it turns out to be my woman, can you imagine this? Not only that - Pop tells me she's the piece man for the Nettabino contract. Just the same, I love her, Mae... I love her.

Maerose Prizzi: Well...

Charley Partanna: How can I live with this? I gotta do something about it. I gotta straighten it out.

Maerose Prizzi: Then do.

Charley Partanna: Do what? Do I ice her? Do I marry her? Which one of these?

Maerose Prizzi: Marry her, Charley. Just because she's a thief and a hitter doesn't mean she's not a good woman in all the other departments. If she was some kind of fashion model, well it wouldn't last more than thirty days. But you and she is in the same line of business. You are lucky you found each other, you know that, Charley?

Charley Partanna: Yeah, I guess.

Maerose Prizzi: She's an American! She had a chance to make a buck so she grabbed it. Marry her, Charley. Then at least I'll be able to get something out of it... I'll be able to go back in the family.

Charley Partanna: Yeah.

Maerose Prizzi: So let's do it.

Charley Partanna: With all the lights on?

Maerose Prizzi: Yeah. Right here. On the Oriental. With all the lights on.

Charley Partanna: Do I ice her? Do I marry her?

Charley Partanna: [On the telephone] Pop? Charley. I'm in L.A., and that ain't all. I'm gonna get married.

Angelo 'Pop' Partanna: Ah, the same woman, the contractor?

Charley Partanna: Yeah. She's Polish, but the family will get used to that gradually.

Angelo 'Pop' Partanna: Yeah, every time she walks in a room, all the rest of the women in the family are gonna have to shut up. But I know how you feel about it, Charley. I won't try to stop nature. Good luck, son.

Charley Partanna: Thanks, pop.

Angelo 'Pop' Partanna: Say listen, the Don wants you here for a big meeting tomorrow night.

Charley Partanna: Jesus, Pop, what about my honeymoon?

Angelo 'Pop' Partanna: Well, you'll have it in Brooklyn!

Charley Partanna: Aw, shit.

[Pop hangs up]

Dominic Prizzi: Jeez Mae, you look awful. My beautiful daughter's turned into an old woman. Charlie Partanna did this to you. He had a chance to be godfather of the Prizzi family and he had no use for you.

Maerose Prizzi: Oh, he had a use for me pop. He came to my place in New York the night before he left to marry the woman in California, and he forced himself on me. He did it to me.

Dominic Prizzi: He did it to you.

Maerose Prizzi: Yeah, poppa. He screwed me three times, maybe four, I can't remember.

Dominic Prizzi: You wash out your filthy mouth, you hear? How can you say such things to your own father? He done that to you? Charlie? You sure?

Maerose Prizzi: Am I sure? Poppa you should see the size of him! You should.

Dominic Prizzi: Shut up! How can you say such things to your father? Where's your honor?

Maerose Prizzi: Are you kidding poppa? I have no honor any more.

Eduardo Prizzi: [reading from the letter from Charley] "Dominic put out a contract on me..."

Dominic Prizzi: He's a fuckin' liar!

Eduardo Prizzi: You wanna hear the letter? Then listen, don't talk. There's about a 130 million dollars here, maybe more. We gotta renegotiate before we get it back. Just shut up and listen. Go on, sit down. Go on.

[continuing to read from the letter]

Eduardo Prizzi: "Dominic will say it's a lot of bullshit. But it so happens he hired my own wife and he gave her a down payment of 50 thousand dollars and my wife is sittin' here next to me and she's laughin' like hell. I personally think the Don found Dominic on a doorstep because Dominic is fifty times too dumb to be a Prizzi!"

[Eduardo and Angelo laugh]

Don Corrado Prizzi: Charley, you swore an oath of blood, my blood and yours, that you would always put the family before anything else in your life. We are calling on you to keep that sacred oath.

Charley Partanna: Irene is my family. She's my wife.

Angelo 'Pop' Partanna: Charley, she is a woman you have known only for a few weeks. She is your wife. We are your life.

Charley Partanna: We've wasted a lot of time, Maerose.

Maerose Prizzi: [sarcastic] 4 years? Why didn't you wait until I was 50?

Charley Partanna: You could have been a fat tub of lard when you were 50.