Wizards of the Lost Kingdom (1985) User Reviews (32)

Pathetic

[bensonmum2 · 2/10 · 21 April 2017]

Standard disclosure: I watched Wizards of the Lost Kingdom courtesy of the new MST3K. I've always prided myself in my ability to separate the movie from the show to give my honest opinion. A movie isn't necessarily bad just because it appeared on MST3K. With all that being said, however, I can honestly say the Wizards of the Lost Kingdom is one steaming pile of monkey poo. The movie tells the story of Simon – a sort of wizard-in-training. Simon's father was killed by the evil Shurka when he took over the kingdom. Simon was sent away for his own protection. Now, Simon, a creature that resembles a commode rug, a garden gnome, and an uninterested, out- of-shape Bo Svenson set off to right the wrongs of Shurka.

I could write so much about Wizards of the Lost Kingdom, but really, what's the point. The movie is so juvenile, so inept, and so plain old bad that it's not worth the trouble. I suppose if you were under 8 years-old, you might find a little to enjoy. Everything about the movie – acting, special effects, costuming, stunts, humor, lighting, plot, direction, sets, locations – is bottom of the barrel. For the most part, I really didn't care about anyone on screen and whether they lived or died. It's all just so pathetic. I haven't rated the movie a "1" for two reasons. First, I have a soft spot for Bo Svenson. He's not the best, most charismatic actor you'll see, but he's made some movies I really enjoy (Inglorious Bastards, for example). And two, there's something about the way Thom Christopher plays a bad guy – or more accurately, overplays a bad guy – that I can't help but enjoy. While he's not as over-the- top as Shurka he was as Troxartes in Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell, he comes close. I'm not going to say it's a "good" performance, just fun to watch.

Amateurish little young warrior thingy.

[emm · 3/10 · 2 January 1999]

Think of this film as a Saturday morning live-action program from ages ago. Even the small tykes will find this one hard to please because it runs like molasses! I can't fully understand how god awful it is to make something too typical and uninteresting, especially in the costume department! Too many warrior-wizard movies out there have used the same old plotline numerous times over, but this is mighty scarce considering its appeal to the little darlings. And who in the world would've let a topless mermaid be cast in the first place? I thought this was a "family" movie! MST3K, here's another fine gem for your 1999 TV season!

Sum of its parts

[kosmasp · 3/10 · 31 December 2020]

Someone watched a lot of fantasy movies and thought: Hey I can do that. Well I would argue, no you can't. No offense to whoever did this. Maybe there was interference maybe other influences ... whatever the case, this is quite the hot mess (or cold mess if you prefer that).

There is I guess a Chewbacca style character that is just ... I mean I guess you can view him as cute too. If you watched this as a kid ... who am I to say what you should feel about this? But Production values and everything cries ... in agony and pain. Even the actors it seems struggle ... then again maybe this has nothing to do with the movie but with their "talent". I'm not going to suggest anything.

Still believe it or not, I have seen worse movies. This can have some moments that are sort of fun (and I'm not talking about the not very well aged Special effects or in camera tricks) ... nothing one has to have seen ... unless they are as crazy as me I guess

it's so bad that it's good

[Jaimz · 12 October 1998]

I saw this movie by accident when it was on TV a few years ago... immediately it became a cult movie for me and my friends.

I've seen this movie about 500 times (i'm serious), and the bad special effects, bad acting, bad story, never gets old.

All i have to say is, it's so bad that it's good.

And they made a sequel??

[aegis-9 · 1/10 · 21 December 2004]

This movie is truly brilliant. It ducks through banality to crap at such speed you don't even see good sense and common decency to mankind go whizzing past. But it doesn't stop there! This movie hits the bottom of the barrel so hard it bounces back to the point of ludicrous comedy: behold as Kor the Beergutted Conan wannabe with the over-abundance of neck hair struts his stuff swinging his sword like there's no tomorrow (and the way he swung it, I really am amazed there *was* a tomorrow for him, or at least, for his beer gut). Don't miss this movie, it's a fantastic romp through idiocy, and sheer bloody mindedness! And once you have finished watching this one, dry the tears of joy (or tears of frustration at such an inept attempt at storytelling) from your eyes because some stupid f00l gave these people another $5 to make a sequel!

A real stinker

[mikeburdick · 1/10 · 27 February 2022]

Imagine if an 8-year-old tried to write a film, and cobbled together an amalgam of characters from all the films they'd seen-'The Wizard of Oz,' 'The Never-Ending Story,' 'Star Wars,' 'Conan the Barbarian,' 'Raiders of the Lost Ark', Disney cartoons, etc. That's 'Wizards of the Lost Kingdom', in a nutshell.

It's essentially a half-baked coming-of-age story of a young wizard who has to recover a ring before the evil wizard finds it. Whoever made it had huge ambitions, but it comes off like an extended episode of 'H. R. Puffenstuff' just less fun and with much lamer costumes and sets. A typical middle school play looks pretty professional, by comparison.

There's no real character development, with every character remaining just as they were at the beginning. The main character is meant to be trained in wizardry, but acts mentally slow throughout and falls for the lamest, most obvious tricks in the book over and over. Rather than survive on his wits, he seems to survive by pure luck.

As noted, it's plot light, so there's not much of a story arc, more a series of predicaments, none of which has much drama. There's a seemingly endless stream of characters who come and go, sometimes in a matter of seconds, often without any explanation of who they were.

The acting is embarrassing all around, especially number-one billed Bo Svenson, who acts like he's begrudgingly playing along with his kids in the backyard. The others are either amateur or high-camp, like the cartoonishly evil bad wizard and his partner, who make Frank-N-Furter from 'Rocky Horror' seem subtle in comparison.

The action sequences often begin and end without any actual action, as if they couldn't afford a stunt coordinator and couldn't be bothered choreographing anything, so just asked the baddies to drop their swords and run away, then moved on to the next scene.

I don't think I've ever rated anything a 1, but this film definitely earned it. Terrible acting, terrible script, terrible costumes, terrible effects, terrible action sequences. I know 'Plan 9 from Outer Space' is meant to be the king of bad movies, but this one's worse.

Yowser! Now this is bad...

[matt-81 · 1/10 · 19 April 1999]

Go immediately and rent this movie. It will be be on a bottom shelf in your local video store and will be covered in dust. No one will have touched it in years. It may even be a $.50 special! It's worth ten bucks, I swear! Buy it! There aren't very many films than can compare with this - the celluloid version of that goo that forms at the bottom of a trash can after a few years. Yes, I gave it a '1,' but it really deserves much lower. 1-10 scales were not designed with stuff like this in mind.

So bad it's good

[brandtfam1 · 5/10 · 22 April 2006]

I first saw this film a long time ago, it was pretty bad. But I still liked it. it was entertaining to watch the worst acting possible. Now you may not know this but there was this Adult fantasy film called DeathStalker, and the plot of Wizards of the Lost Kingdom is set as a direct sequel to it. This movie is bad, so bad it's funny. that's why I give it a 5 star cause I enjoy bad movies. They're fun to watch.

Set after the events of the film DeathStalker, Wizards of the Lost kingdom is a cheaply made movie that even has footage from DeathStalker reedited as part of the movie. The soundtrack however is the best part. By far an original soundtrack, it was actually the soundtrack to Roger Corman's Battle Beyond the Stars by James Horner. It is the only really good thing about this movie. In 1989 a sequel was made and it was even worse.

Wow ... this really lowers the bar

[DaCritic-2 · 1/10 · 15 November 2000]

If somebody wants to make a really, REALLY bad movie, "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" really sets a yardstick by which to measure the depth of badness.

Start with the pseudo-Chewbacca that follows around the main character ... Some poor schmuck in a baggy white "furry" costume that looks as if it was stitched together from discarded pieces of carpeting. Work your way slowly, painfully, through more not-so-special effects that thoroughly deny the viewer from suspension of disbelief. Add a garden gnome (just for the heck of it).

On second thought, skip this movie entirely and find something else to do for an hour and a half.

Words fail

[Coventry · 2/10 · 23 August 2009]

What we have here is a downright brilliant piece of early 80's incompetence that will render even the biggest connoisseur of trash- cinema completely speechless! "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" is a very cheap and cheesy fantasy/Sword-and-Sorcery adventure that doesn't have an actual plot but does eagerly & shamelessly borrows elements from other films. Writer Ed Naha and Hector Olivera (who?) watched enough similar type of movies to know that they needed a handful of essential characters, but probably figured that all the rest would follow automatically. In order to make a fantasy-adventure you need: one super- evil villain (preferably with a black cape), one young hero in training, one lone warrior, one amiable type of furry pet, one wise midget living in the woods (optional) and a whole colorful collection of hideous demons, enslaved dwarfs, and winged gargoyles to serve as filler. The story is phenomenal and so original, with Simon the young son of a wizard having to flee from his beloved kingdom after the evil magician Shurka takes over the power and killed the king. Simon wants to go back and save the people, but therefore he needs his powerful ring which he lost during his escape. Simon befriends lone warrior Kor (the usually cool dude Bo Svenson who clearly needed the pay check), who assists Simon during the long and devastating journey full of ordeals, dangerous encounters and magical showdowns. Admittedly it doesn't even sound too bad thus far, but that's merely just because I excluded all the deliciously inept little details. Simon has a best friend named Gulfax, for example. Gulfax is an albino version of Chewbacca and evokes incontrollable chuckles whenever he opens his poodle-snout to yelp something incomprehensible. The obstacles during journey back home are hilariously irrelevant to the "plot" and simply serve as padding footage to cover up the lack of actual content. Simon has nightmarish visions inside the tent of a suspicious forest nymph, Kor settles an old score with the pig-faced nemesis whose sister he refused to marry and there's the supposedly horrible 'suicide cave' where you can only sing your way out of. But the absolute most unequally brilliant sequence – not just of this film alone but in the history of cinema – involves the resurrection of four zombie warriors. Simon awakes the legendary courageous warriors, hoping they will assist them in their battle, but the rotting corpses only take a few steps, complain about how tired they are and return back to their graves. That's it! So much for the zombie sub plot! Best sequence ever! I could go on listing unintentionally hilarious little details for several more paragraphs, but you get the idea. "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" is a tremendously messed-up "so-bad-it's-good" film. Word of advice: do not watch this joyful piece of junk alone. Invite friends, preferably the dope-headed types with a wicked sense of humor, and watch it in group. It will be a night to remember

Shockingly bad

[Ozias_Pilgrim · 1/10 · 17 December 2018]

Genuinely jaw-droppingly bad. I disagree with the 'it's so bad that it's good' reviews. This film gets to that perplexing level of meaning dissonance, but just keeps going, exploring unchartered depths of bad film making.

Gulfax

[macdonell_calum · 10/10 · 18 October 2006]

This movie is horrible- in a 'so bad it's good' kind of way.

The storyline is rehashed from so many other films of this kind, that I'm not going to even bother describing it. It's a sword/sorcery picture, has a kid hoping to realize how important he is in this world, has a "nomadic" adventurer, an evil aide/sorcerer, a princess, a hairy creature....you get the point.

The first time I caught this movie was during a very harsh winter. I don't know why I decided to continue watching it for an extra five minutes before turning the channel, but when I caught site of Gulfax, I decided to stay and watch it until the end.

Gulfax is a white, furry creature akin to Chewbacca, but not nearly as useful or entertaining to watch. He looks like someone glued a bunch of white shag carpeting together and forced the actor to wear it. There are scenes where it looks like the actor cannot move within, or that he's almost falling over. Although he isn't in the movie that much, the few scenes are worth it! Watch as he attempts to talk smack to Bo Svenson, taking the Solo-Chewbacca comparison's to an even higher level!

I actually bought this movie just because of that character, and still have it somewhere!

Gulfax may look like sh!t, but he made this movie!!! The only reason I've never seen the sequel, or even sought it out, was because of his absence! Perhaps should there be a final film, completing the trilogy, Gulfax will make a much-anticipated return!

This movie is beyond B...

[erickward27 · 7/10 · 8 April 2006]

I have to start by telling you how I came across this movie.It was winter time in Alaska around the year 1990.A friend of mine from Australia was staying with me and my girl friend in a shoe box of an apartment.Winters in Alaska can be a bit brutal and most people stay indoors,drink heavily and watch anything that comes on the television.I had found this movie outside of a thrift store laying in a snowbank and right away new it was a treasure.It is quite possibly the best worst movie ever.We spent the next two weeks watching this movie and drinking like fish.We watched it so many times in fact that we would sometimes turn the television on its side or upside down for a more full filling effect.It is a true gem.The laughs will come nonstop and the memories last forever.If you see this movie for rent in a video store,steal it.You won't regret it!

Presenting: the world's dirtiest waterfall!

[soulexpress · 1/10 · 23 August 2017]

I don't usually review films that I've only seen on MST3K. However, WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM irritated me so much, I've made an exception.

It's impossible to make a wizard-themed movie without a nod to "Lord of the Rings." However, this film does not merely *nod* to Tolkien. It copies him like the class dunce who copies test answers from the smart kid and still gets them wrong. The story revolves around the teen- aged Simon, who must flee when the good King Tyler (yes, King Tyler) is overthrown by the evil Shurka. Schooled in the art of wizardry, Simon must find the Ring of Magic (to rule them all?) and the Sword of Power to defeat Shurka and reclaim the kingdom (which looks to encompass about a city block of real estate). Accompanying Simon on his quest are Kor the Conqueror (an ostensibly great warrior, though nothing he does in the film proves it), Simon's eight-foot-tall pet Gulfax (who looks like a huge white bathroom rug), and the Forest Wizard Hurla (a dwarf who resembles the Travelocity gnome).

Everything about this film reeks of incompetence: the writing, the acting, the costumes, the visual effects (no, that dragon's head isn't a hand puppet!), the stunts, the so-called comedy relief, the sets (could those parapets look any more like Styrofoam?), the locations (where did they find such a filthy waterfall?), the directing, the editing….

Oh yes, the editing! Many scenes felt clipped, which led me to assume the MST3K gang had done some cutting to fit the show's 90-minute time slot. However, IMDb listed the running time as a mere 72 minutes. So the filmmakers themselves were the culprits, which didn't really surprise me.

Bo Svensson was precisely the wrong choice for a swashbuckling action hero. His Kor is noticeably overweight, his hairline is receding, he has more neck hair than a werewolf, his charisma is slightly lower than a 3rd-shift worker's at a mandatory 9:00 a.m. staff meeting, and he swings his sword in a way that made me think of fly-fishing. Vidal Peterson portrays young Simon in such a way that makes Troy McGreggor of THE FINAL SACRIFICE seem like Harry Potter in comparison. Thom Christopher's Shurka is so carpet-munchingly over the top as to make me wonder if the film was an elaborate prank. As for Gulfax, I saw no reason for his being in the film; he literally does nothing the whole time.

Amazingly, WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM spawned a sequel. I'm afraid to watch it, even with the MST3K treatment.

sometimes pure trash is wonderful

[psychodaemon · 14 July 2003]

this got it all, or lacks what every you put it.. very bad acting, very bad costumes, very bad settings, lousy effects, but, still this movie is a perfect example of a movie that is so horribly bad that its awesome..

i bought this on vhs 3 years ago in a fleamarket among 20 other movies didnt even reflect over this movie i just wanted a terence hill movie and got all tapes dirt cheap if i bought em all...

put this in the vhs, i got a thing for 80ies fantasy movies...

this is the only movie i saw, then directly afterwards looked on again, and the day after looked on again... that should tell you something about how cool this movie is... i enjoyed it totally..

Too Noisy To Sleep Through

[boblipton · 1/10 · 22 October 2020]

It's not a good thing when the first thing you notice in a movie is the bad costume design. It's not just the spangles on everything, like Wigstock gone mid-budget, it's someone who's clearly the Wookie -- he looks to be about seven feet tall and wears a costume made from freshly washed, white poodle fur, who is usually shot at crotch level. Well, I suppose there were all those costumes from THE BIRD CAGE just lying around....

Anyway, story. Yes. Wizard Thom Christopher in a darling spangled hat kills the old king and takes over the castle and, presumably the kingdom, if he could find it. The old king's son, Vidal Peterson is a wizard, but not a very good one. He hooks up with wandering warrior Bo Svenson and the aforementioned fake Wookie, and they go on a series of poorly designed, low-level D&D encounters in their quest to get the magic ring. What magic ring? Shut up, he explained.

Along the way, there's a lot of sets from Dollar Store's Post-Christmas. sale There are also bat puppets, computer effects designed on a Sinclair ZX80, and lots of people in spangly hats. This was the year Bo Svenson joined the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Coincidence?

a Sword&Magic campy humor film...not to purists of the genre

[a_mon_lem · 4/10 · 5 January 2012]

Deliberately the movie has a plenty scenes of parody of the Conan the Barbarian style films, i've watched this in a BETA videocassette release, i found the end credits full of the bloopers occurred during in filming, Bo Svenson take the matter as a tongue cheek humorous attitude to make this "thrash" movie, added the special effects Ed Wood trademark,for many late adolescents won't take this movie seriously, but a nostalgic feeling comes companies in remember the movie, of course. Not released in cinema, i found this in video if anyone want ask if this movie passed through cinema marquees, never i heard about them, only few scenes cut or may i must say were steal ed was posted in another TV spots in Mexican open TV networks...but this film cab be found in the thrash movies sharing place with Udo Bowel or Allen Smithee films.

Whew! What a Stinker!!! :=8P

[MooCowMo · 1/10 · 4 May 2000]

Need a lesson in pure, abject failure?? Look no further than "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom", an abysmal, dirt-poor, disgrace of a flick. As we all know, decent moovies tend to sprout horrible, horrible offspring: "Halloween" begat many, many bad 80's slasher flicks; "Mad Max" begat many, many bad 80's "futuristic wasteland fantasy" flicks; and "Conan the Barbarian" begat a whole slew of terrible, horrible, incredibly bad 80's sword-and-sorcery flicks. "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" scrapes the bottom of that 80's barrel, in a way that's truly insulting to barrels. A young runt named Simon recaptured his "good kingdom" from an evil sorcerer with the help of a mangy rug, a garden gnome, a topless bimbo mermaid, and a tired-looking, pudgy Bo Svenson. Svenson("North Dallas Forty", "Inglorious Bastards", "Delta Force"), a long-time b-moovie muscleman, looks barely able to swing his aluminum foil sword. However, he manages to defeat the forces of evil, which consist of the evil sorcerer, "Shurka", and his army of badly costumed monsters, giants, and midgets. At one point, a paper mache bat on a string attacks, but is eaten by a 1/2 hidden sock puppet, pitifully presented as some sort of dragon. The beginning of the film consists of what can only politely be described as bits of scenes scooped up from the cutting-room floor of udder bad moovies, stitched together in the vain hope of setting the scene for the film, and over-earnestly narrated by some guy who never appears again. Words cannot properly convey the jaw-dropping cheapness of this film; the producers probably spent moore moolah feeding Svenson's ever expanding gullet than on the cheesy fx of this flick. And we're talkin' Brie here, folks... :=8P Director Hector Olivera("Barbarian Queen") presents this mish-mash in a hopelessly confused, confuddled, and cliched manner, destroying any possible hint of clear, linear storytelling. The acting is dreadful, the production levels below shoe-string, and the plot is one tired cliche after another paraded before our weary eyes. That they actually made a sequel(!!!) makes the MooCow's brain whirl. James Horner's("Braveheart", "Titanic","The Rock") cheesy moosic from "Battle Beyond the Stars" was lifted, screaming and kicking, and mercilessly grafted onto this turkey - bet this one doesn't pop up on his resume. Folks, you gotta see this to believe it. The MooCow says as a cheapo rent when there is NOTHING else to watch, well, it's moore fun than watching dust bunnies mate. Barely. :=8P

A disaster fantasy movie

[stefanozucchelli · 5/10 · 2 February 2022]

This movie turns out to be one of the worst zeta series fantasy I've seen. There are too many problems to enumerate them all. I recommend seeing it so you can get an idea yourself.

As if it were made for Mystery Science Theatre 3K

[romine1 · 2/10 · 2 March 2024]

Some of the actresses are attractive. The villain looked the part. And Bo Svenson speaks English. That's the end of any praise, other than the unintentional hilarity of the costumes, special effects, dialogue and cinematography.

Every stone and castle scene is an homage to stucco and paper machet. The yeti-like mascot looks like a hobo draped in a synthetic fur rug. And child actor Vidal Palacios (Peterson), who played Simon, has disappeared since this film was released.

I'd only recommend watching on the 2023 MST3K release on Netflix. While its easy to criticize, I've gotta say I'm thankful for awful old flicks like this one. Hope the actors had fun making them.

Every bit as good as Labrynth

[kdr2555 · 5/10 · 22 September 2022]

If watched and enjoyed Labrynth, The Never Ending Story, Krull, The Princess Bride or any other 70's and 80's science fiction/fantasy movie made for 6 to 12 year olds, you should enjoy this. That being said, I think this move killed Thomas Christopher's Career (he was Hawk in the Buck Roger's TV Series) the movie is woth watching for the many opportunities it gives for mockery, derision, ridicule at it's expense. The key point is this movie was not made for anyone with an intellectual, or social maturity beyond about the age of 14. I watch These movies occasionally for the purpose of a short escape from reality and to relatively easier more carefree times in my life. At those times this movie and all the others that fit my description above Score 10 Star.

Why I like this crazy movie

[halation · 10/10 · 26 October 2004]

When I saw this movie first, it was long ago on VHS-Video. I did like this movie, because it was funny and excitingly. Some years ago I saw another movie, called: *Andy Colby's Incredible Adventure* In this movie were parts of *Wizards of the lost kingdom* used in. They called this movie "KOR the conquerer". I began to search for the "KOR"-Movie many years, because I wanted to see the complete movie, not only the parts which were used in the *Andy Colby*-Movie. No shop had this Kor-Movie to rent and no shop did know this movie. Many years I watched my old VHS-tapes I had at home, and what a wonder... I had this movie since many years still at home, but the movie had a different title, because in Germany it has 3 or 4 titles. So I was happy to find this tape at home and this time I had much more time in watching *KOR the Conquerer again. The music is great during the hole movie, but the best part of filming in combination with the music is this moment, when KOR is walking drunken through the green forrest. The music in the background had some kind of magic. I like Bo Svenson, and also the boy, who played Simon in the movie. Both of them did their job very good. Manfred Kraatz, Germany, 26.10.2004. Thanks to all for reading my comment.

An Enjoyable Escape

[gavin6942 · 6/10 · 3 October 2017]

When evil screams throughout the world. When all the galaxies converge. When all that's fair and fine seems lost. A Hero will emerge.

Ed Naha wrote this film and in retrospect had some humorous things to say: "I don't think this movie was so much shot as it was beaten to death. When they whittled it down to what was useful from the footage, it only ran 58 minutes. Now Roger (Corman) had done a lot of sword-and-sorcery films, and so he told a couple of the editors to pull all they could from them and edit that footage in. So now the finished movie has a 15 or 20-minute prologue that has nothing to do with rest of the film!" Some of the added scenes are obvious, and anyone who knows enough of Corman's work will notice the recycled score and other second-hand pieces. But despite the slap-dash effort, it actually comes out to be a pretty fun movie. Plot inconsistencies, yes, and some silliness, but still plenty of fun... and some rather gnarly monsters and bad guys. Whoever built these props and costumes is first-class.

Wow!

[carolinequick · 10/10 · 13 July 2005]

Although i am inclined to agree with the other comments made by people who have seen this movie, i am ashamed to say i rather like it. Not often can such a huge pile of 80s pap be found outside of a Wham! video, so it is most definitely worth a viewing (£0.79 a night in my local store!). Watch out for the insanely obvious seams and zip on the monster's costume, the fact that the 'hero' looks a lot like Keith Chegwin and such classic lines as the following: Evil Wizard-Type Bloke: "At last we meet Kor..." Kor: "Thrilling, isn't it?"

Amazing!!I also like the fact that although the video box looks quite exciting with images of a castle surrounded by raging seas and a dangerous falcon-like bird carrying a handsome hero to safety (among other such 'interesting and engaging' suggestions of what goes on in the actual film, none of them actually happen. No, I'm not joking...there really isn't a raging sea or a ferocious bird, it's just trying to make you interested...classic in my opinion. This film gets 10 for pure entertainment value!!

Oh my......

[msalbego · 11 December 2003]

Oh....I'm not even sure what to say about this thing. Without question, the worst film I've ever viewed in my lifetime. As I watched, my eyes grew larger, my mouth gaped, and drool poured out. I cannot believe stuff like this gets created. People, this was in THEATRES. Imagine PAYING to see this! Oh the humanity.