Firehouse (1987)

I like trashy/crappy films. I like those moronic 80's sex comedies that used to be on Skinemax and Up All Night. I like garbage films all around! HOWEVER...

This is so bad, I am actually p*ssed off at myself for watching this. Sure it had its abundance of boobs, but it lacked any sort of cohesion. The fake Irish & British accents were insulting to anyone's ears, let alone the acting was beyond wooden... it was petrified! Just imagine, a movie full of supposed humor that is the equivalent to a 'knock-knock' joke... but just imagine someone telling a 'knock-knock' joke without actually saying 'knock-knock'! It was edited so poorly, that I think whole sentences were left out or something because the scenarios didn't even make sense. The characters are nothing anyone could possibly identify with, and not one of them were likable. In order for a movie like this to remotely hold one's interest, there has to be at least 1 character that you actually like, or at least one character that is funny... and this film contained neither. All the characters were such creeps that you couldn't even laugh at their lowlife-factor. I'll put it this way, "Troll 2" has more cohesion and better acting than this (and I am NOT kidding!)