Roxanne (1987)

Claire Caplan: Lydia

Quotes 

• [C.D. drops from a tree in front of the ladies] 

  C.D. Bales : Where am I?

  Nina : You're in Nelson.

  C.D. Bales : Nelson? Why, I'm home. They brought me home!

  [waves to sky] 

  C.D. Bales : Bye! What day is it?

  Nina : Friday. "Dallas" is on.

  C.D. Bales : Friday? Then it took no time! It didn't exist in time!

  Dottie : What?

  C.D. Bales : The spacecraft! I was walking along, and a spacecraft landed right in front of me.

  Lydia : I read about this in the Enquirer. Did it have lights on it?

  C.D. Bales : Lights? You never saw so many lights! It was like Broadway! Then this door opened. A creature came out, had big suckers on his palms! He walked like this:

  [makes pucker sounds] 

  C.D. Bales : Then he took his palms, put them right on my face. Took me over to Roxanne's house, because they wanted to observe me.

  Dottie : At Roxanne's house?

  C.D. Bales : That's where they are right now!

  Dottie : Ah, this is bullshit. We'll miss "Dallas", come on, girls, let's go.

  C.D. Bales : You think I'm nuts, don't you? They wanted to ask me about older women.

  Nina : Why?

  C.D. Bales : Because they wanted to have sex with them.

  Sophie : Where?

  C.D. Bales : Here! Right here in Nelson. They wanted to start a colony of supermen who would have sex with older women because they said, and I quote, "they really know what they're doing."

  Lydia : We do!

  Sophie : It's been so long!

  Dottie : Oh, girls, girls! Do you actually believe that there are creatures from outer space who want to have sex with older women?

  [pause] 

  Dottie : Let's go and check it out!