Whose Line Is It Anyway? (1988–1999)

Greg Proops: Self

Photos 

Quotes 

• Greg Proops : [doing the voice on the tape for 'Mission: Improbable' where the mission is to 'get dressed']  All three of you get dressed individually. Otherwise, if you don't get dressed, you'll go outside and you won't have any clothes on. The government cannot be held responsible for the ramifications of this. If the secretary sees you without clothes he'll become aroused... and deny that he knows you. This tape will self-destruct in three or four days so use Royal Mail and make sure it goes nowhere.

• Greg Proops : [Dating Service Videos- Wearing a Greek Ruler hat]  I am Vishnu, the destroyer

  [buzz] 

  Greg Proops : Come with me or perish.

  [buzz again] 

  Greg Proops : Date me or face the bald man!

  [Clive is really mad; Greg finally walks off] 

• Clive Anderson : [Superheroes, someone has just called out Useless Man]  Oh, Caterpillar man! That gives you more to play with, because Useless Man... is kinda what he is. Now what sort of crisis will he have to deal with?

  Person in the Audience : Pants are too small!

  Clive Anderson : Funny thing... have we ever done that?

  Greg Proops : If we have, I'm sure it was frought with hilarity!

  Clive Anderson : So, with that challenge, let's go ahead. So pants are getting too small...

  Greg Proops : Which one am I?

  Clive Anderson : You're Captain Caterpilar.

  Greg Proops : Captain Caterpilar.

  Clive Anderson : And you can bring the elements of Captain Useless as well.

  Greg Proops : Look, I'll be Captain Caterpilar and you can just sit there and be Useless Man like you usually are.

  Clive Anderson : Oh, you're winning tonight, as I can see. So, you might metamorphose into something...

  Greg Proops : Is it about time to make some sort of inappropriate American reference?

  Clive Anderson : Not yet, you do the show.

  Greg Proops : Thanks.

  Clive Anderson : The yakker.

  Greg Proops : I can take a few hits, if you want to...

  Clive Anderson : Get on with it Greg!

• Greg Proops : When's it gonna end, huh? The aggression.

  Clive Anderson : When you give us our colonies back.

  Greg Proops : His colonies. Clive's colonies.

• [hoe-down about sex] 

  Greg Proops : Oh, I'm a randy bugger; I really get around/I like to have a shag with everyone in town/I have lots of fun, I'm happy as can be/And that's cause my name is Tony Slattery!

• Greg Proops : [Let's Make A Date. Greg Proops is the contestant, and Steve Frost is a bachelor acting as a German U-Boat captain]  Contestant number one...

  Steve Frost : [pulls off one of his shoes]  Das Boot!

• Tony Slattery : [World's Worst things to see while flipping through channels]  It's Anne Diamond!

  Ryan Stiles : [in a trance]  No, I won't turn the channel Satan

  Greg Proops : [as an Alien]  Citizens of Earth, remain in your homes

  [cracking up] 

  Greg Proops : send me-

  [buzz] 

  Ryan Stiles : They're nipples, identical nipples!

  Mike McShane : It's the OJ Simpson trial, year 2550!

  Greg Proops : [goes up as Clive, immediate buzz]  OHHHH!

  Mike McShane : Hi, welcome to the serial killer home shopping network, and look at these knives!

  Tony Slattery : Oh, it's that show where Clive patronizes everyone!

  Clive Anderson : Don't bring Clive James into this!

  Tony Slattery : No, I meant Clive Anderson!

  Mike McShane : It's the OJ Simpson trial- Hey, he's being defended by Clive Anderson! Ha!

• Greg Proops : [after a scene in a bathtub]  I think we've learned something from this, Delbert!

  Ryan Stiles : We sure have! Number One- never take a bath with another man!

• Greg Proops : Righty-ho, Mr. A.