Major League (1989)

Margaret Whitton: Rachel Phelps

Photos 

Quotes 

• Board Member 1 : I've never heard of half of these guys and the ones I do know are way past their prime.

  Charlie Donovan : Most of these guys never had a prime.

  Rachel Phelps : The fact is we lost our two best players to free agency. We haven't won a pennant in over thirty-five years, we haven't placed higher than fourth in the last fifteen. Obviously it's time for some changes.

  Board Member 2 : This guy here is dead!

  Rachel Phelps : Cross him off, then!

• [a naked Lou Brown tries to take a bath, but the whirlpool is broken] 

  Lou Brown : I've had it with this nickel and dime stuff! I'm gonna get that bitch on the phone!

  Rachel Phelps : [enters the locker room]  You wanted to talk to the bitch?

  Lou Brown : Yeah!

  Rachel Phelps : Don't you think you oughta cover yourself with a towel first, Mr. Brown?

  Lou Brown : We're out of towels, and I'm too old to go diving into lockers.

  Rachel Phelps : I can take it if you can.

• Rachel Phelps : [Charlie and Rachel are having a meeting about the team]  Any ideas?

  Charlie Donovan : On how we can get worse?

  Rachel Phelps : Mmmmm...

  Charlie Donovan : How about a series of fines for good play? Maybe a $30,000 bonus to the guy voted Least Valuable Player.

  Rachel Phelps : Maybe the problem is... we're coddling these guys too much. Yeah!

• Rachel Phelps : I think he'll fit right in with our team concept.

  Charlie Donovan : That reminds me, I was going to ask you. What exactly *is* our team concept?

• Charlie Donovan : Vaughn's been looking good out there today.

  Rachel Phelps : Don't worry, he'll blow it.

• Lou Brown : Oh, this old body could use a soak...

  Roger Dorn : Yeah, but you won't like it too much,'cuase it ain't working again.

  Lou Brown : Dammit, I thought that they were gonna replace this thing!

  Eddie Harris : [Coming in]  Hey! there's no hot water in here!

  Lou Brown : I've had it with this nickel and dime stuff! I want that bitch on the phone!

  Rachel Phelps : [Coming in]  You wanna talk to the bitch?

  Lou Brown : Yeah.

  Rachel Phelps : Shouldn't you cover yourself up with a towel, Mr. Brown?

  Lou Brown : We're out of towels. And I'm too old to go diving into lockers.

  Rachel Phelps : I can take it if you can.

  Lou Brown : What happened to the new whirlpool we were supposed to get?

  Rachel Phelps : Our budget has forced us to cut back on equipment.

  Rachel Phelps : [Knocks on Vaughn's athletic cup] 

  Rachel Phelps : ooh, cups still work though. Guess you're gonna have to fix the old whirlpool.

  Lou Brown : We've fixed it six times already! Now there's no hot water in the shower!

  Rachel Phelps : The pipes in this building are old and rusty.

  Lou Brown : How am I supposed to take care of my players with no hot water and no therapy equipment?

  Rachel Phelps : Your players have to get a little tougher. What are they a bunch of pansies?

  [while holding a pair of leopard briefs] 

  Rachel Phelps : [the rest of the team makes an obscene gesture behind her back] 

  Lou Brown : Over 162 games and even tough guys get strains... Sore arms... Muscle pulls...

  Rachel Phelps : It's only temporary. If I can get anybody to watch this team none of this would be necessary.

  Rachel Phelps : [walking out] 

  Rachel Phelps : You're lucky I can still afford to pay your salary.

• [repeated line] 

  Rachel Phelps : Sit down, Charlie.

• Rachel Phelps : I hate this fucking song.

• [first lines] 

  Rachel Phelps : Good morning, gentlemen, and welcome to another season of Indians baseball.

• Lou Brown : What happened to the new whirlpool we're supposed to get?

  Rachel Phelps : We're having a few problems that have forced us to cut back on equipment.

  [taps Vaughn's cup] 

  Rachel Phelps : Ooh! Cups still work, though. We simply have to fix the old whirlpool.

  Lou Brown : Yep, that's 6 times already. Now there is no hot water in the shower.

  Rachel Phelps : The pipes in this building are old and rusty.