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Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jerry Seinfeld, Jason Alexander, and Michael Richards in Seinfeld (1989)

Wayne Knight: Newman

Seinfeld

Wayne Knight credited as playing...

Newman

Photos37

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+ 22
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Quotes17

  • [repeated lines]
  • Newman: Hello, Jerry.
  • Jerry: Hello, Newman.
  • Newman: Just remember, when you control the mail, you control... information.
  • [Jerry takes Newman's mail route so Newman can get transfered to Hawaii]
  • Newman: Too many people got their mail. Close to 80%. Nobody's ever cracked the 50% barrier.
  • Jerry: I tried my best!
  • Newman: *Exactly*. You're a disgrace to the uniform.
  • [Newman rips USPS patch off of coat]
  • Jerry: You know, this is your coat.
  • Newman: [looks at torn patch] Damn.
  • Jerry: Newman, you wouldn't eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.
  • Newman: I love broccoli. It's good for you.
  • Jerry: Really? Then maybe you'd like to have a piece?
  • Newman: Gladly.
  • [Newman spits it out]
  • Newman: Vile weed!
  • Jerry: You're giving up that easily?
  • Newman: I usually do.
  • Jerry: Newman, you cant let the dream die. You moving away is my dream too.
  • Jerry: You wouldn't it broccoli even if it was deep fried in chocolate.
  • Newman: What? I love broccoli.
  • Jerry: Oh yeah? Taste.
  • [Newman tastes the broccoli and spits it up]
  • Newman: Vile weed.
  • Newman: I propose... AN ALLIANCE.
  • Jerry: An alliance?... Deal.
  • [Jerry and Newman share an evil laugh]
  • Jerry: [stops laughing abruptly] Now, get the hell out of here.
  • Enzo: How'd you like to have free haircut for six months?
  • Newman: What's the catch?
  • Enzo: You're going to get me a sample of Jerry's hair.
  • Newman: Hmm, that job sounds like it might be worth a *year's* free haircuts... and a comb!
  • Cosmo Kramer: Keith Hernandez!
  • Newman: Keith Hernandez! I despise that man!
  • Cosmo Kramer: Remember my idea about rickshaws in New York? Well we're gonna make it happen.
  • Jerry: No your not.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Well Newman knows a guy in the Hong Kong post office.
  • Jerry: No he doesn't.
  • Newman: He's shipping us a rickshaw. It can't miss.
  • Jerry: Yes it can.
  • George Costanza: Why are you home? You're supposed to be out on your route, and getting my calzones for Steinbrenner.
  • Newman: Well, I saw that it's raining outside, so I called in sick. I don't work in the rain.
  • George Costanza: But... you're a mailman! 'Neither rain, nor sleet, nor snow... ' It's the first one!
  • Newman: I've never been much for credos.
  • George Costanza: But I'm paying you!
  • Newman: Hey, thanks!
  • Newman: [Newman is sneaking through Jerry's apartment trying to cheat at Kramer's and his "Risk" game when he knocks over some of Jerry's cassette tapes] Damn!
  • Cosmo Kramer: It's Newman! Quick open the door!
  • Jerry: [when Newman escapes from the window and up the stairs to his apartment] I see ya Newman, I see ya!
  • Cosmo Kramer: I'm taking the Congo as a penalty!
  • Newman: Ah, look, I? I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm a US postal worker and my mail truck was just ambushed by a band of backwoods mail-hating survivalists.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Human, it's human to be moved by a fragrance.
  • Pam: That is so true.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Her bouquet cleaved his hardened...
  • Newman: [whispering] ... shell.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Shell, and fondled his muscled heart. He imbibed her glistening spell, just before the other shoe fell.
  • Pam: Kramer, that is so lovely.
  • Cosmo Kramer: It's by an unknown 20th century poet.
  • Pam: Oh? What's his name?
  • Cosmo Kramer: Newman.
  • Newman: You see, certified mail is always registered, but registered mail is not necessarily certified.
  • Newman's Girlfriend: I could listen to you talk all day about mail.
  • Newman: I'll tell you a little secret about zip codes: they're meaningless.
  • Newman: [to rickshaw pullers] Ok, bring it down to the end of the block, make a controlled turn and bring it back, let's see what you got, go.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Hey, where's he going?
  • Newman: I think he's stealing our rickshaw.
  • Cosmo Kramer: Oh then he's out.
  • Homeless Man: I'll take the job.
  • [pause]
  • Homeless Man: Potato salad!
  • Jerry: Oh, by the way, Newman, I'm just curious, when you booked the hotel, did you book it for the millennium new year?
  • Newman: As a matter of fact, I did.
  • Jerry: Oh, well, that's interesting, because, since everyone knows that there's no year zero, the millennium doesn't really begin until 2001, which would make your party one year late, and thus, quite lame.

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