Eddie: This is a sex shop isn't it?
Shop Assistant: Yes.
Eddie: [slaps money down] I'll have five quid's worth then!
Shop Assistant: Very droll sir, I've never heard that one before.
Eddie: Haven't you? Shall I tell it again?
Shop Assistant: No thank you sir, I'd rather have a pineapple inserted violently into my rectum.
Eddie: You've been working here too long mate.
Richie: [on various occasions seducing women, well, trying anyway] May I say, what a SMASHING blouse you have on?