12 May 2003 | VideoPokerAddict
I never, ever did anything to deserve this.
Many people will probably never know how truly awful some movies can be. Perhaps they've seen such atrocities as "Battlefield Earth" or "Crossroads". Maybe they've even seen a lot of the horrific stuff that was on MST3000.
That all seems tame compared to films such as this. Every conceivable problem arises with this clunker. Let's see what we have here: There is narration more obnoxious than listening to Rosanne sing the national anthem for 20 years. A musical score which would've been more appealing if they recorded an angry chimp taking out his aggression on a piano. Editing which was apparently done by a 4 year old with a pair of scissors and glue and a blindfold. A screenplay which might as well have been written by randomly stringing words together.
The problems just go on and on and on. Is your idea of excitement seeing Dick Van Patten making out with Priscilla Barnes? What about James Hong making out with Priscilla Barnes? Perhaps you enjoy watching people play roulette in a New York comedy club/casino. (What the...?!!) If so, then this might be your cup of tea. If not, then I would recommend running as far away from this movie as you can. 1/10