Space Ghost: I'll be dead long before you were born and I'll be dead long before you'll be dead.

Zorak: I am the Lone Locust of the apocalypse. Think of me when you look to the night sky.

Zorak: My favorite episode of The Golden Girls is the one where they all took contaminated Geritol and died.

Space Ghost: That was never an episode!

Zorak: Well, it should have been.

Space Ghost: Moltar, flush the lake.

Moltar: We don't have a lake.

Space Ghost: Good work.

Space Ghost: I have a giant brain that is able to reduce any complex machine into a simple yes or no answer.

Space Ghost: Oh boy, the Shatner's really hit the fan now. I'm up Dawson's Creek without a paddle.

Space Ghost: I could plead the Fifth.

Zorak: If you could count that high.

[watching 60s cartoon of himself]

Space Ghost: Those stupid kids, why did I even bother?

Space Ghost: I'll spank you smartly with my spank ray.

Zorak: I got a friend coming by in about five minutes, so, uh... I gotta escape.

Space Ghost: What are you all gonna do?

Zorak: I think we're gonna smash light bulbs out by the dumpster.

Space Ghost: No one sleeps with my grandmother!


Space Ghost: Right?

Zorak: Right!

[in the background]

Zorak: From now on.

[singing the Twelve Days of Christmas]

[a horribly failed attempt at the Twelve Days of Christmas]

Council of Doom: On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Black Widow: Leonard Nimoy Sings!

Tansut: Four quesadillas!

Lokar: Three reruns of "What's Happening!"

Metallus: Two plus eight is ten.

Brak: Hi, my name is Braaaak!

Space Ghost: Enough! That was pitiful!

Space Ghost: Bears are Crazy. They'll bite your head if you're wearing a steak on it.

Space Ghost: I saw a yard gnome once. It didn't scare me!

[wearing large wig]

Zorak: What? This is my natural head of hair.

[Space Ghost and Moltar are holding a dinner murder mystery]

Space Ghost: Now, what about these beans?

Moltar: Those must've fallen out of my hair.


Moltar: Well, you're just making all this (bleep) up!


Moltar: Oh, what, you're the only one that gets to make (bleep) up?


Moltar: Those are part of the dinner.

Space Ghost: No they're not. They're part of the plot.

Moltar: They were on the menu.

Space Ghost: Murder is on the menu.

Brak: Space Ghost... I think I'm pregnant.

Zorak: Moltar, take off your helmet... show me your true face.

Moltar: Why?

Zorak: Because, I'm intrigued.

Moltar: No.

Zorak: C'mon... I'll be your friend.

Moltar: NO!

Zorak: C'mon... I'll give you a dollar.

Moltar: Okay...

[loud hissing sound]

Zorak: GOOD GOD!

Space Ghost: Moltar, what's our depth?

Moltar: 20,000 leagues, sir.

Space Ghost: Take her to twenty-one.

Moltar: Twenty-one? But... why?

Space Ghost: Because it's more fantastical.

Space Ghost: Dames are like mustard: they taste great on a sandwich. But when you're not eating a sandwich... they just sit there in the fridge... on a shelf... in a jar... labeled... mustard.

Space Ghost: Welcome back, stupid viewers! You'll watch anything! Go ahead, change the channel. You'll be back!

Zorak: Hey! You took my soul!

Zorak: You dance like a woman.

Space Ghost: I dance like a woman... if she were a man!

Zorak: Well... ya got me there.

Zorak: Vengence is the refuge of the weak.

Space Ghost: Did you just call me a monkey?

Space Ghost: Let's break down these boxes so they store easier!

Zorak: ...That's boring!

Space Ghost: You don't know from fun!

Moltar: Show me the heinie!

Zorak: Put your pants on.

Space Ghost: I'm gonna go to the desk, now...

Zorak: You go ahead and *try*. You see what you get.

[teleports to the desk]

Space Ghost: Here I am now... At the desk.

Moltar: [shouts] You got lucky, Pal!

Zorak: You try it *next time*! You see what you get!