This is one of the most god-awful movies ever. Shaq better just stick to basketball. This movie took away apart of my life I will never have back. I will make fun of this movie until I die, and then some. It is so horrible it is not even funny. MST3000 would have a blast with this one.
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zabouke5 May 2001
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JosephPezzuto30 December 2016"Let's green egg and ham it." I was only seven years old when Kazaam was released into theaters, starring Shaquille O'Neal as the eponymous enchanter. And to this day I am truly grateful that my parents never took me to see this magical mishap of a motion picture two decades later. Back in the 90s when Shaq was at the height (no pun intended) of his professional career with the NBA, Los Angels Lakers and doing several Reebok or Pepsi commercials, his film appearances, especially as a main character, proved to be disastrous. The tag line on the VHS and DVD cover or what have you reads: "He's a rappin' genie-with-an-attitude...and he's ready for slam-dunk fun!" I as the viewer greatly disapproved. Even the Los Angeles Daily News didn't know what to say, so they just slapped "FUN!" on the cover in big capitalized yellow letters. Nonetheless, I would taken away the 'N'. With a budget of $20 million, only earning back $18.9 million in return, it also obtained a six percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes based on thirty-three reviews, and a twenty-four out of one hundred on Metacritic. So why did this family fantasy flop so hard? Let's take a look.
The film promptly opens on a swinging wrecking ball knocking down a dilapidated building in New York City; a perfect metaphor. A final swing knocks Kazaam's lamp in slow motion onto a boombox that just happens to be there as we hear him screaming. And how fitting to see director Paul M. Glaser's (David Starsky from the Starsky & Hutch TV show) name appearing over the sound of breaking pottery. That sound effect alone sums up the rest of the movie indefinitely. We then meet Max Connor (Francis Capra), a twelve-year-old kid on the run from a local gang of bullies, who chase him into the said building being demolished. Max accidentally kicks the boombox and unknowingly awakens the 5,000 year-old genie just as the bullies find him. Kazaam scares them away with his so-called rapping. Max later goes home to Alice (Ally Walker). She is a single Mom of whom she and her son don't exactly see eye to eye, especially since she's seeing a fireman named Travis (John Costelloe, of whom was an actual FDNY firefighter in real life and played Jim "Johnny Cakes" Witowski on The Sopranos). Kazaam later explains to the troubled youth, of whom at first wants nothing to do with him, that he can grant him three wishes. From telling Max that he doesn't "believe in fairy tales" to even taking a shower in front of Max in his own bedroom singing an almost unrecognizable rendition of Stayin' Alive...its just a mess.
Eventually the tough Max warms up to Kazaam and starts to believe what he says when he causes mountains of junk food to rain down from the heavens. He also realizes that he owns the towering turban-wearing thaumaturge until he makes his last two wishes. Of course what Max really wants is to get to know his estranged father (James Acheson), of whom left him when he was two. He sets out to find him, only to discover that he is a musical talent producer of which the cause of his success is specializing in unauthorized music. Kazaam forgets about Max once the boy's father takes a liking to him as a new possible rap talent as he tries his hand at a music career at his nightclub. But the sleazy villainous club owner Malik (Marshell Manesh), wants Kazaam for his own, and it is only the final wish, from the heart, that Max wishes that his Dad would be given a second chance at life as Kazaam personally deals with the Malik and his cronies. Hereafter, Max then accepts Travis as a new father figure.
Kazaam is really one of those good/bad movies that emerged in the 90s. It was good because it was and still is a fairly harmless family film, but bad because it has over time gained attention since its release for its absurd concept and Shaquille O'Neal's performance, making it a critical and financial failure. It also caused Paul M. Glaser to never direct another film since due to negative reviews on his work. Roger Ebert gave the film 1.5 stars, writing: "Shaq has already proved he can act (in Blue Chips, the 1994 movie about college basketball). Here he shows he can be likable in a children's movie. What he does not show is good judgment in his choice of material. [...] the filmmakers didn't care to extend themselves beyond the obvious commercial possibilities of their first dim idea." In a 2012 interview with GQ magazine, O'Neal said, "I was a medium-level juvenile delinquent from Newark who always dreamed about doing a movie. Someone said, 'Hey, here's $7 million, come in and do this genie movie.' What am I going to say, no? So I did it." Though more suited in appearing as a film cameo, Shaq's last leading role would be in the following year as John Henry Irons/Steel in the critically-acclaimed box office bomb 'Steel', nominated for a Razzie Award for Worst Actor.
If Kazaam is wishful thinking in the power to begin anew, than it should have stayed bottled up and lost for one-thousand and one nights deep beneath the sands of the Arabian desert. The film is innocuous but its demise is that it is solely based on and crafted from a mix of genre clichés. Kazaam lacks imaginative stamina and, compared with Shaq's larger-than-life charisma, the film does not know what it wants to be either due to stifled, routine filmmaking and terrible rapping. Nowadays the movie is just a guilty pleasure for millennials to riff or poke fun at. My wish for you is that you never buy or rent Kazaam and see this jolly black giant on your television screen anytime soon. -
TheLittleSongbird1 June 2011Well, adolescent really(19). Like Howard the Duck, Kazaam was a movie I loved as a child but looking back on it I was shocked at how low my taste buds were as a kid. Granted, there are some funny moments specifically the ones with the flying toasts and the bicycle race. And it is not the worst movie of 1996, Ed and especially Bio Dome are worse. However, the special effects are really quite substandard, and the rest of the production values are of direct to video quality and shoddy ones at that. The story is predictable with only a few worthwhile scenes to favour, the sight gags suffer from poor comic timing and the script is childish and simplistic. The characters I really dislike here, the kid is annoying, the villain is one of the lamest I have seen in a long time while Shaquille O'Neal's Genie with his awful rapping(then again I dislike rap intensely, and that is the least problematic of his performance) grated on me fast. The acting doesn't fare much better either, while the direction is literally non-existent and the soundtrack is only tolerable if on mute. This is of course my opinion, disagree all you want, I guess I just didn't like it. 2/10 Bethany Cox
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tokyostreetkiller21 May 2006Shaquille O'Neal delivers an Oscar worthy performance in what might be the most powerful performance of the 90's. All around, it is brilliant. This is a gripping and amazing tale about a genie and his friendship with a lonely child. Acting is purely amazing and the story is beautifully played out like poetry in motion. Honestly, this film goes down as one of the all time greats. Top to bottom, this film is perfectly mastered. Every actor in this film comes through and nails the role perfectly. 11/10
Now, imagine the exact opposite of that. Got it? Okay, the truth is...the movie isn't even *that* good. Shaq, what were you thinking? -
Melllvar29 January 2001This is the worst film I have ever seen.I was watching this film with some friends and after 40 minutes we had enough. The plot was bad and there wasn't a single likeable character.I could get more entertainment watching static. I gave this movie a 1 only because the scale didn't go into negative numbers. Avoid this movie at all costs.
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What a pathetic movie.
I won't waste much time commenting about it. I'm still trying to get back the couple hours I wasted on it.
Let me leave it simply with - Shaq has NO BUSINESS being an actor or singer. He is utterly without talent at both discplines. It's a crying shame that substantially more talented people waste away in community theatres and karaoke bars while Shaq uses his name as a basketball player to undeservedly get cast in movies and cut CDs.
Much of the failure of this movie was the pathetic no-talent that is Shaq. -
akalite_libra21 March 2008For the life me, now that I'm 19 (almost 20) I have no idea why I watched it as much as I did. My dad actually laughed when I asked to get it. For one, it stars Shaquille O'Neal, which should have been a clue. At the time, I thought that was neat, and made me watch it more. I loved this movie while I was young. I use to pray for the genie, so I could make it rain candy. The most hilarious part, was it was an illegal copy, and at the bottom of the screen, it would scroll "This is an illegal copy. If you have bought this from a store, you have broken the law." Anyway, as I got older, I saw how stupid the story line is, and how bad the acting is. However, it was part of my childhood, and you can't ignore your childhood. Make fun of me all you want for once liking it, but remember, I was seven at the time.
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netroach29 January 1999Okay, Shaq can't act. But he doesn't need to; he's mostly there to be big and imposing. It's hardly a good movie, but it's an entertaining kidflick...
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iamnessie23 December 2006i was given the book version of Kazaam for my 8th birthday, and people always say the book versions are always better than the movie, but this time they were wrong. At least with the movie it's over soon.
The acting in this is terrible, which i expected from a film with Shaq who plays a magical rapping genie that comes out of an old ghetto blaster (which there was probably a good reason he was trapped in there). The kid in the film that plays Max is whiny and a terrible actor. He's bullied by neighborhood kids, which i don't blame them because he's a little douche bag.
The story is just plain stupid and extremely cliché. About a boy who's father is always working and never around who finds a new friend who makes his life better and eventually helps him reconnect with his father.
Even at 8 years old i thought this was a stupid idea. It's a surprise any of the people whom worked on this film had careers after wards because it's an embarrassment and should have never been made. i could ramble on even more about how this movie sucks, but you should already know just by reading the plot. -
If you are a fan of really bad movies, and you think there funny, you will the great acting of Shaq. First off putting pro players in movies hardly ever works. Shaq had to of been the worst actor i have ever seen next to Dennis Rodman who also made a few bad movies. Well any way this movie is also bad due to the hideous kid. I would give this a zero but that is impossible.
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Now everybody knows Shaq should stick to basketball. This movie wasn't as horrific as pointed out but I've seen better. A 5,000 year old, rapping, seven-foot genie trapped in a boom box is suddenly awakened by a 12 year old New York boy with nothing better to do. He grants the kid three wishes (all which are not that great) and through it all, a friendship develops. Shaq--or Kazaam-- is discovered at a nightclub, becomes a temporary success, while somehow Max is unhappy with his life. His father is involved in selling bootleg tapes and is involved in some kind of scheme with Malik, the Middle Eastern owner of the club. Max's final wish is for his daddy to have a second-chance. The wish is granted, Shaq is released from that stupid boom box, becomes free, and runs off with Asia-Moon (some woman in the club).
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Hu-Flug-Dung3 November 2006This movie really helped me find myself. Before I saw this movie, I wandered this streets crying often knowing my life had no purpose. Until one faithful day, I found myself in Chuckey Cheese on my usual drinking binge. When to my surprise, the robotic Chucky Cheese and gang started singing "Happy Birthday" which sounds exactly like "You're the Best" (a song from Karate Kid) after an eleven day drink binge. I saw a bright light, which many witnesses argue was a fire cause from the bad wiring in the Chucky Cheese band, pointing at the prize shelf. I took the remaining money I found on a passed out man outside the Chucky Cheese and went to play the Wack-A-Mole game that changed my life. I furiously pounded the moles while I was in the middle of the Chucky Cheese. The children screamed and cried as I fulfilled my destiny; if I could see those children again, I would hug them, for I would not have been able to win those two magical tickets. I went over to thank Chucky which soon after I blacked out, passing out on stage I woke up a few days later in my one room apartment with the tape super-glued to my face. In my excitement I quickly tore it from my skin and shoved it into my VCR. The next hour and thirty-six minutes (I got the special edition) of my life would be the happiest any man could ask for. I was so blown away by the amazing special effects that I was overcame and called an ambulance to pick me up after the movie ended. Shaq play a stunning and realistic role as a rapping Genie. I often found myself dancing in room to his tunes while my neighbor was yelling hurtful words and threats through the wall. After awhile though, I passed out on my floor. Awaking from another blackout, I caught glimpses of Shaq giving candy to all the children. I laughed, I cried. Could this movie be as brilliant as I realized. The ambulance pulled up and I told the paramedics to grab my belly; I was immediately tared. After a few weeks in intensive care, I returned to my house how I left it. Kazaam has given me a new out look on life and hopefully it will help shape your views.
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Floated216 October 2008Kazaam is an alright movie and isn't that bad. It doesn't deserve to be rated so low and in the bottom 100. It was decent. The movie starts out a little shaky but it gets better. The acting in the movie is kinda bad and the plots are very predictable but it was still okay. I'll admit that Shaq's acting is bad and he should stick to rapping and the NBA, the other characters acting weren't that awful.
The movie has a nice fell to it while watching, the scenes and designs are cool. One of my favorite parts in the movie is when Max is talking to Kazaam and Kazaam tells him that he has 3 wishes, so Max wishes that it would rain burgers and fries. That part was funny and cool. I also liked the ending in the movie.
Id recommend this movie -
filmboy-167 July 19991. Paper-thin plot that has been done before 2. A rapping genie cum-basketball player 3. A very, and I mean very infuriating bratty kid. 4. 3 stupid wishes 5.Product placement (then again, what movie doesn't have this) 6.crummy script. 7. Shaquille O Neal rapping. Stir together and you have Kazaam....... What a poor movie!
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nathan-moore18 July 2004This is, by far, without a doubt, the best movie that has ever been produced on film. Shaq's awesomely realistic portrayal of a rapping genie is the best thing to be displayed on screen in decades, rivaling performances of Al Pacino, Kerry Grant, Jack Nicholson, Marlon Brando, and all of the other great actors of our time. Now Shaquille O'Neal shall be added to that list. This uniquely told tale of a boy who finds a whimsical boom box wherein lies a magical genie is one hundred percent genius. This film came at a time when good writing and good casting was scarce in Hollywood; but this film renews hope in a new generation of audiences, and renews hope in a culture. >From the musical score to the costume design, this film is purely golden; the 'Citizen Kane' of a new generation.
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frequentlyrandom21 July 2003Ok, the best thing to do going into this film is to not expect anything from it. I just found it channel surfing a few months back (late May 2003). I remember hearing about it years ago when they first came up with the "movie." But I found it incredibly corny. But in a good way. Shaq plays himself pretty much, a big joker. And who would expect much acting prowess from a man who calls himself "Shaqdiesel."
Anywhoo, as long as you acknowledge that this is going to be a horrible movie, bereft of anything worthy of even seeing a movie, t'is a good way to let your brain turn to jello, like, say, after studing for finals or writing a 10 page paper in 3 hours ;-).
---P.R. -
cmkj-2798321 March 2023The original cut of this movie was better when it was called Shazam and starred Sinbad! When they recut it to include Shaq, the continuity of the film evaporated. And to think they ruined a perfectly good movie all because Sinbad told a joke about Producer Scott Kroopf in his standup set!
Little did Sinbad know that Mr. Kroopf was at the Laugh Factory that night. Immediately, he pulled distribution of Shazam and reshot the movie with Shaq. To save on expenses, the scenes got longer and included a lot more filler - a far cry from quippy, fast-paced Sinbad version. It's a shame the whole conspiracy occurred just as the world wide web became more widely accessed, or else the studio would have had a harder time recalling the thousands of copies of Shazaam that were shipped to video stores. -
This is quite possibly the worst movie of all time. It stars Shaquille O'Neil and is about a rapping genie. Apparently someone out there thought that this was a good idea and got suckered into dishing out cash to produce this wonderful masterpiece. The movie gets 1 out of 10.
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TheNewCritic24 December 2010So I'm aware that this film was released a fair while ago, but I've only just seen it; and not out of free will. I can some up this film in 1 word.... Shaq, the only "actor" who is more robotic than the Terminator. And really thats all that needs to be said, it's a stupid stupid movie that barely makes any sense, it's so uninteresting that I could feel myself getting stupider as I watched. If you see a copy of this film DESTROY IT, and then maybe one day the world will be ridden of this raping of cinema known as Kazaam
1/10 (and the only reason it scored that high is that i'm not allowed to give it a zero) -
Smells_Like_Cheese6 June 2010The other day my girlfriends and I were having our pizza night and looking for movies to watch. Kazaam was on demand and I asked if any the girls had seen it, only one of my friends did and I asked if it really was as bad as everyone says it is. She said she didn't remember since she saw it as a kid so we all decided to go for the bait and see if Kazaam really does deserve one of the worst movies in cinema titles. Oh, yeah, it really does. I could not believe how bad this movie was. Shaq has the acting quality of a wooden shelf, the kid who is supposed to be a hero is actually a brat, the villain of the story looks like a chewed up version of Mario from Super Mario Brothers and the story does not make sense for the child audience it was aimed for. How in the heck is a child supposed to relate to this story of trying to get his pirate music stealing father back with his mother while being stalked by a 7 foot tall grown man offering him free treats and all the presents in the world and OH MY GOD does that not sound so bad?! There are so many things wrong with this movie it drives me insane.
A schoolboy named Max is confronted and chased down by a group of bullies through the city of New Bronslin. Max is chased into the abandoned building, where he discovers a magical boom-box and accidentally unleashes the genie inside. The genie, who introduces himself as Kazaam, tells Max that he is now Max's genie. Max returns home to find that his mother is marrying a fireman. It is revealed that his mother lied to him about his real father's whereabouts, and that he is actually located in the city. Max set out to search for his father in the hopes of rekindling some sort of bond between them. He suddenly encounters Kazaam during his travels, who pesters Max into making a wish. Max eventually finds his father, only to learn that he is a musical talent agent who specializes in pirated music. A employee of the nightclub shows interest in Kazaam upon the realization that he is a genie, and hopes to control Kazaam through Max's father.
Between the awful acting, the terrible script and the lousy effects, this movie is just plain bad. This is how bad this is, Shaq literally slam dunks the villain to defeat him! If that's not a plug in for his career, I don't know what is. The kid Max has no likable qualities, he has a very loving mother and a possible step father who cares for him, yet he acts like a total jerk because he's not getting his way with not having his dad around who is a criminal no less! Even when his criminal father kicks him out of his life, Max still does everything to save him, sick isn't it? Shaq, I don't know the writers were thinking. Maybe that it's so funny that a giant basketball super star should be a genie and it's a great way to make a quick buck for those sucker parents who's kids are begging to see the film. I don't know how to say this other than just say it, it really is as bad as everyone says it is if not worse. Trust me, don't waste your sanity on this horrible movie, Shaq's acting is enough to make you wish this movie never existed in the first place.
1/10 -
Quinoa19843 June 2006Yes, Kazaam is one of those horribly bad movies that almost reminds one of everything that is wrong with not just kids movies, but with humanity. Here we have Shaq as a rapping genie- yes, a RAPPING genie- where he does everything from making bad puns to dressing in ridiculous outfits, all ending in him in a Christ-like pose with lots of light surrounding him. So, yeah, expect really cheesy bits, including the first wish being a lot of junk food falling down from the sky (and, regrettably, not knocking out the two main characters, particularly the kid). What might not be expected is that a film with a kid and Shaquille O'Neill would be so incredibly schmaltzy! The main plot of the film involves this kid, played in that all-too-typical and annoying-kid fashion by the great-grandson of Frank Capra (where in which the kid is yelling out his dialog angrily), who comes upon a genie who's been trapped in a boom-box. Then "hiarity ensues" as the kid makes the Shaq-genie his quasi-slave as he waits on his last two wishes as he tries to make amends with his shady-gang-type absentee father.
This really sappy, contrived son and father story would be bad enough, as there are certain lines that have been uttered in a million other movies (i.e. the "two chances in life" speech from father to son). But it's Shaquille O'Neill who is both the reason to watch the film (ironically), and the obvious sinking crux of it all. His plot line involves him, when not getting the over-talky treatment from Capra, to rap within the dialog and also start off his blossoming recording career. On top of this, he also kicks ass and takes names with the main bad guys who want him back in the boom-box. So is there a camp factor to the movie? Up to a point, but this is even squashed by all of the mushy scenes and 'heart-felt' moments that have really no business with the rest of the material. One might ask if the people making the movie, who were obviously doing it at the behest of the popularity of a BASKETBALL player who wanted to go on the Michael Jordan acting bandwagon, if it would be anywhere near decently entertaining or convincing. I'd hope that they too knew they were just getting paid. But I'd hope even more that they felt at least a little guilty afterwords for feeding the Shaq-machine.
So, if you want to have a fun night of Shaq as genie-turned-rapper-turned-wisecracker, all the more fun to you. Hell, it might even be interesting to have a Shaq movie night with this and his other critically acclaimed effort Steel. But if you're hoping to keep a few brain cells, stay away from what is very likely the worst flick of 1996, and a candidate among many others for worst of the 90's. -
Shaq. Francis Capra. What's the worst that can happen when you join together a horrible basketball player and actor, and one of the worst child actors of the 90's? Before you can say "kazaam," you get "Kazaam," a film that goes to show why such crucial elements as, say, actors and dialogue are important to a story.
The screenplay is just plain bad, and the acting is even worse. The directing style is...well, I don't know, but it was really, really bad. And then, the film has the mandatory emotionally-controlling segments that have nothing whatsoever to do with the already pointless plot, like the whole divorced father piece. Priceless. Priceless as in so awful it has no price.
Cut to the chase, and my sypnosis is this: DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE!
1/5 stars -
John Ulmer -
Dude. This movie was AWESOME. I loved when he dunked it. Alright, i'm drinking, but so what? So, apparently I have to fill 10 lines of text. That's terrible. Good thing I got half a bottle of wine left. So, yeah, Kazaam was amazing. Shaq was a genie. Who better to play the part? No one, that's who. Yizzeah. So, anyway, Max lives in Compton and is sick of getting shot at so he hires this basketball player to be his genie. Said basketball player is terrible at free-throws. Anyway, this guy is always..like..turning crap into something else and making some other crap fall from the sky. Then he (and the Miami Heat) beat the Washington Wizards 105-86 in the opening game of their Eastern-Conference-semifinals playoff series, but then he lost to Steve Nash in the MVP voting. So, the moral is, genies are better than wizards.
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rdoubleoc3 May 2020The movie and plot is dumb, but the concept is a fun idea (who doesn't like genies?). It could have been a much more entertaining movie, however.
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JudasXIV19 January 2002I'm only giving this movie a 1 because I think that this one deserves such a low rating not based only on Shaq's bad performance (either on the set or on the court or on the album). Just taking a look at the camera work, sfx and other performances and letting yourself be entertained is not a just cause to give this movie a 10 let alone a 7. If it weren't for the 10 being a counter-vote I would've given it a 0.