[some time after Dr. Warner was electrocuted]

Dr. Newman: Hello, Alf, I'm Dr. Newman.

ALF: No need to ask who you're replacing.

Dr. Newman: We're going to try a little game called numeric sequencing.

ALF: Does involve electric shock?

Dr. Newman: Absolutely not.

ALF: Forgive me if I'm still paranoid, there's still a silhouette burned into the linoleum.

[the military is playing a video of one of the tests done on ALF]

ALF: This one is definitely the Pepsi.

[Mullican and Hill have kidnapped ALF and put him in a mail bag]

Dr. Mullican: Don't look now, the mail's awake.

ALF: What's going on? Oh, wait, now I remember, I'm being kidnapped by humans. There's a switch.

ALF: [ALF is strapped into an electric chair] I take it this isn't the word association test.

Dr. Warner: No, no. We're going to conduct a different test.

ALF: I'm not sure I like the word 'conduct'.

Dr. Warner: [after ALF looks at a High Voltage sign] Oh, pay no attention to that sign, it shouldn't even be there. I'll remove it if it bothers you.

ALF: It bothers me.

[Warner gets electrocuted when trying to remove the sign and falls over]

ALF: [as Warner begins to sizzle on the floor] Medic. Medic.

Military Researcher: Good morning. I'm Dr. Carnage.

ALF: Yikes.

Military Researcher: Yikes yourself.

Dr. Mockton: Hello, I'm Mockton. I'm going to show you some inkblots.

ALF: Does this involve electric shock?

Dr. Mockton: Let's not start that again.

ALF: I'm a bit curious about the "Don't ask, don't tell" policy here in the military.

Dr. Carnage: What about it?

ALF: Well it assume it's worked to you advantage.

Dr. Carnage: [to the camera] Stop the tape.

Dr. Stanley: Let's try some word association. I'll say a word and you say whatever pops into your mind.

ALF: Food.

Dr. Stanley: I haven't said anything yet.

ALF: Nothing interesting, at least.

Dr. Stanley: Sit.

ALF: I am sitting.

Dr. Stanley: No, that's the first word: sit.

ALF: Oh, um... food.

Dr. Stanley: Sunrise.

ALF: Breakfast.

Dr. Stanley: Square.

ALF: Meal.

Dr. Stanley: Left.

ALF: Overs.

Dr. Stanley: Should we stop and get you something to eat.

ALF: I could use a little snack.

[after watching footage of Alf in a crash test]

Maj. Melissa Hill: That crash test is the perfect example of the cruel and inhumane punishment Alf has been subjected to, Mr. Chairmen.

Col. Gilbert Milfoil: He had an airbag, it just didn't work.

ALF: [Rick is angrily venting his contempt for Dexter Moyers] Rick, I've never seen you like this.

Dr. Mullican: Nah, I just don't like the guy, is all.

ALF: No, I mean from this angle... and I thought I had a lot of nose hair.