15 September 2003 | uds3
RPM: Remarkably Poor Movie!
As one reviewer came close to commenting. This film is above crticism. To do so, bequeathes it a degree of status to which it is not entitled. In fact the only reason to watch it, besides the plethora of droolable vehicles on show is the undeniable pleasure to be had (assuming one is male...actually in THIS day and age, that is probably no longer a necessary requisite!) watching the professionally curvy Miss Janssen removing her skimpy black knickers for the purpose of inflaming the passions of her mechanic whom she has just erotically doused with what looks like seriously low-grade motor oil!
Anyone notice Jerry Hall scowling alongside the Aston Martin DB3? The years haven't been overly kind so it would seem, since her walk-on slinkathon in furs with Rock icon Bryan Ferry at the latter end of his "Lets Stick Together" film clip! Mind you...a life with Jagger???
But I digress! Arquette can never be anything but the goof he is..the film has by necessity been dumbed down to accommodate his dubious talents here. EIGHT LEGGED FREAKS I suspect is as good as ever he's likely to get. Having said that...he alone is not responsible for the talentless end-product that masquerades here as passable entertainment. You're talking el-cheapo production values, first-time actors, a script by creatively bereft 8th graders and hammy directing. Regrettably its not bad enough to be notable or off-beat enough to be vaguely interesting.
What it IS....is a home movie that neither Janssen or Arquette would want to include on their resume!