Quest for Camelot (1998)

Gary Oldman: Ruber

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ruber : [after the giant ogre sits on him]  The ogre's butt.

• Lady Juliana : You're mad.

  Ruber : I'm *so* glad you noticed. I've been working at it for years.

• Lady Juliana : Ruber.

  Ruber : Juliana. I was in the neighborhood, and I thought I'd invade. How about a kiss? I hear you're still single...

  Lady Juliana : Impertinent pig.

  Ruber : Is that a no?

• [Lying under the giant ogre] 

  Gryphon : Well, at lest things can't get any worse!

  Ruber : Wanna bet?

• Ruber : Charming singalong. Now let's get down to business. I've waited a long time for this. What about my new land?

  King Arthur : Sir Ruber, always thinking of yourself. As knights of the roundtable, our obligation is to the people. Not to ourselves. Lands will be divided to each persons needs.

  Ruber : Then I need more than everyone. I wouldn't have supported you all these years if I knew you were running a charity.

  Sir Lionel : The king has decided!

  Ruber : Then it's time for a new king. And I vote for me.

  Sir Lionel : I will not serve under a false king!

  Ruber : Then serve... a dead one!

  Ruber : [moves in to attack Arthur] 

• Ruber : Panic sweeps across the land.

  Gryphon : Precisely.

  Ruber : My plan is perfect.

  Gryphon : Precisely.

  Ruber : Without the sword, Arthur is vulnerable.

  Gryphon : Precisely.

  Ruber : And now Excalibur is mine.

  Gryphon : Eh... here's where we enter a grey area.

• [after Ruber melds Excalibur to his arm with his potion] 

  Ruber : Don't worry, Julianna. I'll make sure Arthur gets it back. Or gets it in the back.

• King Arthur : You may kill me... but you'll never destroy the ideals of Camelot.

  Ruber : Well, I've got to start somewhere.

• Ruber : A spear. How Stone Age. A king would hold a nobler weapon. A king would hold *Excalibur*!

• Ruber : Where did you drop the sword?

  Gryphon : It all looks so *different* from down here...

• Ruber : You've been quite annoying, for a girl.

• Ruber : Find them all and report back to me! Did you hear me?

  Gryphon : Sorry, Master. My mouth was full.

  Ruber : Typical! Of all the evil creatures in the world, I had to find one with *table manners*!

• Sir Lionel : I'll not serve a false king.

  Ruber : Then serve... A DEAD ONE!

  [Ruber attacks Arthur] 

• Ruber : When I get my hands on that girl...

• Ruber : [last words]  Oh no, the stone!