11 March 2013 | Bezenby
Full on post-nuke trash!
It post-apocalypse time again! Everyone's decked out in leather gear, with open top jeeps and machine guns. There's mutant cannibals and weird cults, bad hair and a heavy metal soundtrack. Everything's fine in the Empire of Ash, except there's not much ash and plenty of greenery. In a post-apocalyptic world where cultivation is easily done, couldn't everyone get along and do a bit of farming?
Of course not! It's time to strap on an M16 and blow away loads of people! This film has Big Bill Smith as the high priest of a cult trying to breed some old guy called the Grand Shepherd with some young fillies, and that's about all the plot I understood there because I couldn't make out a single thing Bill Smith was saying. You've also got a lady called Danielle wasting all the bad guys, her arms dealing buddies and a young guy who's mum got killed (this guy also has the best 'Nooooo!' scene ever, so extra points there).
It's all just gun fights, explosions, boobs and cannibals, and nothing to worry about. What more do you need from a post-apocalyptic film? Nude oil massage? Well, there's one in here too! Empire of Ash 3 is just what you need - all thrills and no brains. Recommended!